Blob and a Curse [discontinued]

2

*George's pov*

Once my mother had left I was left alone again in my apartment. Only noon but the shadows were already screaming for me to join them.

I take a shaky breath in, I try to compose myself, only to fail. I can feel my mask slide and start to brake. I can't have it this quickly, I just can't. I reach loosely to the blob thing she gave me and I retreat into my room. I place the blob onto my desk on top of dozens of failed attempts to file through my thoughts.

I looked longingly at my discarded guitar on the floor. I wanted, needed, to find right my thoughts down. I had been working on album of sorts? But I don't to realise them well I had already uploaded two them onto soundcloud but only I knew of their existence. I just wanted them to be safe so I didn't delete them and it put me at ease to know they were on a safe platform.

The ones I had uploaded were older ones that I made a couple years ago.

In my uneasiness I just pressed play on one of them and let it play aloud into my room, probably annoying my neighbours.

((play chemical by dean lewis acoustic version))

I found love with the chemicals

I used to pray for a miracle, but now

I know that it's all over

We used to sit by the waterside

I'd kiss your cheek and say "you're mine"

But now I know it's over

And all these little things, they start to slip away

And all these little things start to fade away

And you said:
"Hold me, I'm falling apart"
'Cause I'm scared and lost in the dark
And this feeling surely can not last"

So I took it away, took it away

Away from you

Hmm, whoa, oh

I held your hand but you let it go

And I knew your heart had found a home

Now I know it's over

I flew it out into the sky

Tryna run from this mountain I couldn't climb

'Cause I knew I'd fall over

And all these little things, they start to slip away

And all these little things start to fade away

And you said:
"Hold me, I'm falling apart
'Cause I'm scared and lost in the dark
And this feeling surely can not last"

So I took it away, I took it away

And we were making plans and breaking dreams

When you were next to me

It's 3AM in the back of a cab

And I am begging on my knees

Don't go, won't you stay?

I can't stand to watch you walk away from me

And you said:
"Hold me, I'm falling apart
'Cause I'm scared and lost in the dark
And this feeling surely can not last"

So I took it away,
I took it away
Away from you...

Hmm, whoa, woo, oh

The memories started to flood back I just can't, I need to write down my emotions but I can't.

Before he could stop himself from crying his other started playing

((play better of dead by sleeping with the sirens))

She said she wants to end it all when she's all alone in her room
She cries
The way she feels inside is too much for her
When all you got is these four walls
It's not that hard to feel so small
Or even exist at all
How come no one heard her when she said

Maybe I'm better off dead
If I was would it finally be enough
To shut out all those voices in my head?
Maybe I'm better off dead
Better off dead!
Did you hear a word
Hear a word I said?
This is not where I belong
You're gonna miss me when I'm gone
This is not where I belong
You're gonna miss me when I'm gone

She doesn't know she's beautiful
Because no one's ever told her so
And the demons that she has, are all she knows
And maybe she can fall in love with someone in her life that she could trust
And tell her she's enough
How come no one heard her when she said

Maybe I'm better off dead
If I was would it finally be enough
To shut out all those voices in my head?
Maybe I'm better off dead
Better off dead!
Did you hear a word
Hear a word I said?
This is not where I belong
You gonna miss me when I'm gone
This is not where I belong
You're gonna miss me when I'm gone

When all you got is these four walls
It's not hard to feel so small
When all you got is these four walls
It's not hard to feel so small
All she wanted was to be enough
All she wanted was to be enough
So what does it take?
Maybe it's not too late
Yeah no one heard her when she said

Maybe I'm better off dead
If I was would it finally be enough
To shut out all those voices in my head?
Maybe I'm better off dead
Better off dead!
Did you hear a word
Hear a word I said?
This is not where I belong
You gonna miss me when I'm gone
Gone, gone
This is not where I belong
You're gonna miss me when I'm gone
This is not where I belong
You're gonna miss me when I'm gone

I went to hug my knees but felt the blob on my lap, I was to overwhelmed to remember that I had put it on his desk, to overwhelmed to feel it softly nuzzle it's head into my chest. I just hugged the blob and held it for dear life, I just couldn't stop myself from crying, I hadn't sobbed like this in over 7 months. I needed it, but it's wasn't welcomed with open arms.

It look me a much shorter time to calm myself down, it just felt like someone was hugging my lovely and patting my head to calm me down when all I was holding onto was this stupid blob thing.

I took one last shaking breath it and looked at the blob and whispered, "thank you" it was dumb I know, but it was nice to feel someone's company.

I know I just had my mother over and I love her, I do but she just wasn't the company I needed but she was the only company I had.

I feel dumb, this is dumb, it's only some dumb shitty cheap stuffed toy. And I'm 19! I can't find comfort in a stuffed toy.

I got out of my chair and collected the new music sheets my mother had brought me. I took a long breath in when I sat back down, not noticing the blob was no where in sight.

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