Musings of the Insane

Selfish

I sit here alone, with thoughts of you,
Tears tolling down my face.
How can you love me?
How can you even stand to look at me?
**
How dare I!
How could I block your beautiful light
With my ugly darkness!?
How could I be so selfish!?
**
I should leave you and run,
So that you aren't infected with
My lonely, fatal disease.
But I am selfish.
**
I need you too much.
I need you more than life!
But it isn't my life I'll be ruining, is it?
It's yours.
**
How could I be that selfish!?
I would give up everything for you,
Except for you,
Which makes no sense at all.
**
I am so selfish, I already know I'll hurt you if I stay with you.
But maybe some selfish part if me
Believes that you can cure me of this darkness.
**
Either way, it's still so wrong.
I should leave and let you find someone who isn't broken inside,
Who is as beautiful as you.
**
The thought of you with someone else,
Angers and horrifies me, but I know
That it is the best thing for you,
So that you can finally be happy.
**
I have to let you go,
But I can't.
I just can't.
I'm so selfish...