The mafia hunt.

5|Acceptance

Nova

Stage 5-Acceptance

When we finally come to acceptance, it's not that we don't feel pain anymore. Because, the pain never truly goes away no matter what however, it's when we finally realise that this is our reality now, the new normal and we have to accept that.

Our heart will still hurt when we think of them, they may be all we think about. But at last, we know that they're in a better place, they're in peace and we can't too. It will hurt every time they cross our minds or that special day comes up on the calendar and you're left celebrating alone.

But we can move forward.

I smooth out my dress, a heavy weight on my chest. I look up into the mirror, glad I decided on wearing no makeup today. I don't want to look like that lady from the IT crowed. You know? The one who begins to cry and ends up looking like the joker?

No thanks.

I tie my hair back into a loose ponytail frowning at the dark circles under my eyes. I slip on my jacket and let out a large breath.

Todays the day where we finally let him go.

I walk out of my bedroom and into my quiet empty apartment. My shoes click against the wooden floors boxes still scattered around the place. I haven't yet got all my furniture, I only have what I need for now.

My bed.

I grab my purse placing my phone and keys in it and slipping my gun into the secret pocket of my jacket. I pick up the card with his picture on, written words of how missed he'll be. It truly does hurt so much.

Swallowing the lump in my throat I leave the card on the table, not wanting to see his face everywhere I go. Locking the door behind me I make my way to my car, light rain patting down.

"You can do this." I say to myself as I look outside of the car window.

"It's just a funeral. It's okay, everything is going to be okay." I mumble nodding my head with determination. I start the car and begin my drive.

I can do this.

***
I can not do this.

There's too many people coming up to me and saying how sorry they are for my loss. To many people sharing stories I didn't want to hear about. Too many people crying for a man they didn't know.

I can't do this. Everything is not okay.

The rain has now picked up and is drenching everybody. Umbrellas have been opened shielding the people dressed in black. I look over at the large mass, practically half of the mafia has come. I've been to a funeral before and we don't take loosing one of our own lightly. I spot many Italian and English mafia symbols tatted onto skin. I even see a few Russian and French members paying there respects.

Because Grayson inherited the throne, he has a lot more people here today. It only makes my heart beat more and my skin clammy. I swallow the lump in my throat, feeling Liam place his arm over my shoulder giving it a comforting squeeze.

I look over at him and he sends me a nod. I let out a shaky breath and face back to the front. Six men dressed in black suits carry the casket towards us, there face emotionless. The crowed becomes silent only cry's being heard every now and then.