The mafia hunt.

21|With The FBI

Unedited

Nova

21|With The FBI

I felt like I was getting tired. Even though I know there's a chance he could be alive and out there, I didn't know how long I could keep going. I was confused with myself, part of me has hope that's he's alive. I mean I saw his grave fucking empty! Another part of me just wanted it all to end. That part of me has seen and bared the worst. They had all the tears, the endless nights of wondering if he would ever come back. They had the screams of hurt and anger that was thrown out into the world.

That part of me is so fucking tired and they've mourned him. They've been allowed to feel the pain, anger, but most of all, they've felt alone. That's how I feel when I look up at myself through the mirror. My eyes dull and my skin pale, I splash some warm water over my face and turn the tap off. 

My hands travel towards my rumbling stomach. "All right, we'll get you some food," I mumble and walk out towards the kitchen.

My eating habits were something I was trying to get used to, the change is something I want ready for. Foods I used to love, either make me throw up or just taste disgusting. Whereas, good I hated have again, either become something I love or I throw it up. For example, eggs, I loved eggs with some crispy bacon and sausages for a nice breakfast. Now every time I even smell them, I'm gagging as I run to the bathroom.

Now, what am I eating? Fucking cereal with a glass of chocolate milk. I'm eating like a child and I couldn't care one bit. I pour myself a bowl of chocolate mini Weetabix and my usual glass of chocolate milk. Walking over to my sette placing my socked covered feet up and wrapping a big blanket around myself, I turn the tv on and settle down enjoying my breakfast.

I look over at the kitchen, a frown on my face. A sudden sense of loneliness overcame me.

"Okay, what's next?" I look over at Grayson, his face practically shoved into a cool book. I giggle and he looks over glaring at me but I can still see the smile.

"Hey! Do you want these cookies or not?" He rolls his eyes.

I walk over to him, wrapping my arms around his waist and resting my chin on his back. "I do and I'm very thankful you are willing to make them for me," I mumble into him.

He turns around and hums. "You don't sound thankful." He shrugs with a goofy smile on his face. "I think you should help me."

I laugh and roll my eyes. "Fine. I don't mind helping you." I shrug and walk towards the laid out Ingredients on the table. "People do that," I look over my shoulder meeting his gaze, "Help people. Not that I'd expect you to understand." I laugh when his hands grip my hips and spin me around. He serves me down and I turn to face him with a smile on my face.

He rests his hands on my hips and I brush back his soft hair. "You, Grayson Blackwell, are one of a kind," I whisper softly.

His hand cups my cheek, his eyes watching me with curiosity. I tilt my head to the side with a small smile wondering what's going on in his head. "What are you thinking about?" He shrugs shaking his head softly.

"You truly are what they call you," He whispers and I pause looking at him confusingly.

"What do they call me?" I nervously laugh. He leans down towards my face, his lips hovering slightly over mine.