The mafia hunt.

13|An Angel To Save Me

Unedited
I need some motivation to edit these chapters, guys. 😩

Grayson

13| An Angel To Save Me

I saw her. I looked over her. I loved her from a distance. She was always closer to me then she thought. I couldn't resist myself, I had to be near her. I didn't care if I would be found and killed, as long as I got to see her one last time, that's all I cared about.

Was her.

Before her, nothing kept me from leaving. But then she came into my life with her dazzling smile and stunning eyes, a laugh that made me smile, her voice so soft it made my heart calm down during a storm. Her love that made me feel wanted, needed and that comforted me at my worst.

Just, her.

"You can't keep doing this." His voice thick with disapproval.

I slam the door behind me and ignore his judging eyes that follow my tired figure.

"You're only hurting her more then you already have." Although I tried to ignore his words, I still heard them. I heard the truth behind every syllable he spoke. Each one cutting me deep.

"I know." I sigh, rubbing my face.

"Then why do it? Why keep torturing her?"

Why? It's a question I ask myself everyday, why can't I just walk away? I know it's the best thing to do, to keep her safe if she's out of my arms. But I don't want her to be, I don't want to leave her. I didn't ask for this, I didn't want to do this but I had no choice.

It was me 'dying' or her actually dying.

What would be the point in that, if she's no longer walking and breathing on this earth. Then why should I?

"I can't live without her." I look towards him. His eyes close in exhaustion.

"Are you really living?" He asks. I turn my head away from him, looking down at my hands, my finger running over where my ring used to sit. Now a tan line replacing the silver band, the one that sits on her finger. I felt closer to her somehow, like I was connected to her.

"I'll never truly live without her, Nikko. But it's pretty damn close." I mutter and walk away from him.

Another early morning I've come back after visiting her. She doesn't know I'm there, how I wish she could see me. Every night, I've made it a habit to go to her. It's just getting harder and harder to walk away from her. I could barely do it the first time, Nikko had to drag me out there himself. I'm afraid I may slip up and endanger her more then I already have.

It's so just hard to be away from the one you love.

I'm scared. I'm terrified she's going to forget me and move on. I know I should want that, I should want her to live again and find someone who will love her. But I'm selfish, I don't want her to forget me and love another. I don't want her to have a life without me In it.

I'm so mad at the whole situation. I feel like the same kid who would hold back his tears and scream as a belt came to my back over and over. I felt like I was back in the basement, locked up for hours on end.

I felt like a prisoner.

They took away the one thing I had. It was like taking oxygen away from a human being, you can't survive without it. I felt like my oxygen was taken away and I'm left suffocating.

I swear each day I was growing to become even more crazy.

My walls are filled with pictures of her. Everyday I wake up, the first thing I see is her beautiful face. I would smile softly, then I would frown and stare at them blankly.