I saw him for the first time in two months. I sat in the row behind him and plucked the back of his head on my way to my seat because I know that makes him smile. I saw his smile for the first time in months. I almost melted on the spot and was smiling the entire service. He makes me happy and I'm glad to know I do the same to him. I love him too much to let him go.
My biggest fear is rejection. Well, that and ending up alone for the rest of my life. Not just single, but having everyone walk out of my life and never come back. That's why I need him more than he knows. That's why I love him more than he can comprehend. And that's why I can't let him go no matter how much he wants me to. I can't lose him. I've had too many people walk out on me and if he leaves, I don't think I'll recover from the heartache that comes with that. Maybe that's why I need to keep my feelings for him hidden as much as I can. I mean he kinda knows but I never confirmed it so it's just his opinion. But I'm not ready to turn opinion into reality. I mean what if he doesn't reciprocate the feelings? What if my confession is what pushes him away? What if it ruins everything we built together? But then what if he does feel the same? What if he's too scared to admit it because he thinks I won't feel the same? What if he doesn't want to ruin our strong friendship? So many what ifs, not enough answers.
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The X File
HumorIt's weird that I'm starting this way late in my life when I could've done this at the beginning but better late than never, right? So I got this idea to wrote out my thoughts about life from "After 3" and I thought it would be good to write out ev...
