Home is You

Chapter 8

Steffy:

It is quiet in the car on the ride home and the tension is thick. I want to say something, anything to comfort Liam, but I don't even know what to say without losing control of my own emotions. I know how ever deep my torture is, it's nothing compared to what Liam is going through.

We pull into the driveway after the longest and quietest ride home ever between us. Liam has gotten out of the car without even a word to me. I can feel the tension between us and I can feel Liam slipping away from me, into the black hole. I want to do everything; no I need to do everything in my power to pull him back. He needs to grasp that this may not be as awful as it seems. I'm on the border if I should give him a bit of time and space to digest what's been divulged to us or talk to him now.

I go with my impulse and decide on for now to just scratch the surface, make sure he is okay, ask him if he wants to talk about it and just reassure him how much I love him and will be there for him. No matter the diagnosis, this doesn't change anything for us or between us. He needs reminding of that.

I don't find him in the immediate vicinity when I go back inside. I check the bedroom before peering outside on the patio. I don't see him, but I see his cell phone on the patio table. I'm assuming he went down to the beach. I open the sliding glass and step outside before closing the door. The sun is shining and there is a slight breeze. I take in the ocean air before heading down the path to the beach.

I immediately find Liam sitting in the sand, shoes off, pants and sleeves rolled up. He's staring out into the ocean. I sit down next to him quietly and wrap my arms around his arm, before placing my head on his shoulder. He doesn't say anything nor does he look down at me. I sigh sadly, wanting anything to take his pain away. I've never felt so helpless, I just want to cry.

I sigh, and rub Liam's shoulder. "You don't have to say anything, Liam. I just want you to know that I love you and this doesn't change anything between us. Whatever it is that you need...." I say semi trailing off. "I am here, and you can count on me. There is nothing I wouldn't do for you. We will get through this no matter what."

We sit in silence for a long time, just being together without the words. Finally, after what seems like a long time, Liam leans over and kisses my head.

"Thank you, Steffy."

******

I finish cleaning up from dinner after putting the kids to bed. My mind is racing from all that we had to take in today. Liam seems to be in a better mind space then earlier, but the atmosphere around him has changed.

"Hey Mom," I hear as I'm putting the last dish in the cabinet.

I turn to face Cooper.

"What's up Cooper?"

"What's going on with Dad? He seemed off at dinner, and then he just randomly left. I thought tonight was going to be game night?"

I use Cooper's sudden interest in game night to my advantage. "What are you saying that you want to participate in game night, now?"

"Definitely not," he replies walking over to the fridge to grab a drink. "It's just that Dad seemed weird. He was all for family fun night, and then he just leaves, and leaves Taylor and Jamie hanging. That's not like Dad. Did Grandpa Bill call him back to the office? Is he coming back?"

"Of course he's coming back. He does live here you know?" I smirk at Cooper. I pause for a moment to think quickly on what I should say to the kids. "Yeah, he had to go back to the office for a bit. You know, Grandpa Bill is a tyrant and wants things done within an hour of assigning it," I lie. I decide to just leave it with that until we know more. I know that if we tell Kelly and Cooper now, we will get asked a hundred questions that neither of us have the answers to. "He will be back later. It's not like you wanted to participate in game night to begin with," I chuckle softly. "If it's not too late do you want me to send him up to your room? Or you will just talk to him in the morning?"

"Nah, it's okay, I'm going to just go upstairs and finish the game. I'll see Dad in the morning."

Within a few minutes of Cooper going upstairs, the door opens and Liam comes in. He looks like a shell of a man, with sadness and pain written all over his face. "I was getting worried about you. So was Cooper, I might add. He was just down here a few minutes ago asking if you were okay and why you rushed out of here so quickly after dinner, especially since you were pushing for game night."

"Yeah, I'm sorry; I just needed to clear my head. I needed some alone time. What did you tell him?"

I nod walking over to him. "I figured that you did, today was a lot. I didn't—didn't know what to tell Cooper when he asked where you went and what was going on with you. He said that you seemed off at dinner. If he noticed it, I'm sure that Kelly did too. I told him that you had to go back to the office for a bit."

He runs his hand through his hair and sighs looking down. "That's probably for the best right now."

I bring my hand up to his scruff. "Are you okay?"

"I guess..."

"I know that you don't really care for them, but I'm going to take a bath in a bit, maybe you should join me?" I ask with a small of seduction in my voice. I bring my hand down to cup him and he groans at the gesture.

"You are a tease," he says. "As much as I'd love to join you, I think I'm going to take a pass on the offer."

"What?" I say semi shocked.

"Yeah, you go, relax and enjoy yourself. I'll see you when you get out and we can talk about how we will deal with the kids and decompress from today. Today was a tough day, but until we know exactly what we—I am up against, I can't dwell on it. I don't want to take away from anything because I'm dwelling on the possibilities and the what if's. For now, I just need to focus on the now."

"You are right, Babe. I'm proud of you. There is just one thing I want to make a correction to."

"What's that?"

I pull Liam's head down to press my lips against his. "It's we. It's what we are up against."

An hour or so later, I'm in the bathroom, just finishing up getting ready for bed. I have brought the new prototype lingerie set from work, and have put a tiny bit of make up on. I am hoping that with a little effort I can help Liam forget all about today. I want him to focus on what's important; I want him to focus on us. The more I think about what I hope is to come tonight for us, the more sensation I feel below. I don't even have to feel to know that I'm dripping. Despite all, I want this man. I want to see him lose control and relax. I want to please him tonight. I want tonight to be about him. I will always take pleasure, but tonight his pleasure will be my pleasure. We both need release from today, but I know he needs it more. Anything I may get out of it is an added bonus.

I open the door to our bedroom, and loosen my robe as I walk in the room. It doesn't take long for me to realize that Liam has fallen fast asleep. He's curled up on his side of the bed snoring lightly. He has pajama pants on, and a sheet lazily pulled over him. I'm surprised at his clothing choice as he is one that sleeps either strictly naked or in boxers only. I walk over to the other side of the bed and slide in, semi disappointed that he's fallen asleep on me, but grateful that he's getting some rest and peace. I swing my arm around him, before wrapping my leg over him as well. I press against him so our bodies are touching. I lean up and kiss the bottom of his chin. "I love you, Babe," I whisper softly before leaning back down and snuggling into his chest, before finally drifting off to sleep as well.