Home is You

Chapter 27

Liam

I fall onto the couch after finishing dinner, my head spinning from the therapy session. I wasn't expecting to get anything out of it, but I actually feel relieved and somewhat happy that I was able to openly talk about Steffy and all that has happened. If felt like at least some of the burden has been taken off my shoulders.

I rub my hand over my face, my head spinning, weight lifted, but still feeling exhausted from today. I maneuver myself to get comfortable on the couch. As soon as I am situated the first thing that pops into my head again, is that today was our anniversary. I feel some guilt that another anniversary has passed that I am not able to celebrate appropriately with Steffy. I wasn't able to send her those vases of roses that I send every year. A couple weeks ago, I was debating if I should send them anyway, but I did not want to drudge up any more hurt and sadness for her. I didn't want to open any wounds that she has been able to heal the past year with me being gone. I don't want to cause her any more pain.

I walk over to the mini bar in my room, and grab the bottle of vodka, along with a glass, and some ice, before sitting back down on the couch and pouring myself a drink. "To us, my Baby," I say raising my glass in the air. "Happy anniversary, Cheers." I take a gulp of the vodka downing it in a matter of seconds. I pour myself another drink, and drink that one as quickly as the last drink. I pour myself one more and set it down on the table. I only plan on having a couple as I shouldn't drink that much with the medicine I'm taking.

I take my phone off the coffee table and reminisce with pictures of Steffy that I've saved on my phone. Even though, it's a pain to transfer the photos over every time I get a new burner phone, it doesn't matter. It's my only connection to Steffy. I begin to flip through the album of pictures from our first wedding in Aspen. It seems so long ago, but at the same time it seems and feels like it was yesterday. We had so much fun together. That trip together, Steffy taught me a lot about expecting the unexpected, going with the flow, not over thinking, going with what feels right. She taught me that, especially feelings don't necessarily need to be a big grand gesture or a huge declaration of love. She taught me that simple is just as important, and could be even more intimate and special.

I still remember what she was wearing on our wedding night. I bite my lip, as I remember her coming out of the bathroom in that short white and black lingerie nightgown. She was stunning, her beauty over taking everything. I couldn't wait to take her bed, and get lost in her. She proved to me that I do matter and that my feelings were important. She taught me that relationships are not one sided. I can still see her face clearly as I entered her and she cried my name in satisfaction. It was the most fulfilling feeling, and to watch her come down from her high, just set me off and I began to fall with her.

I loved seeing her smile as I kissed her neck in the afterglow, as I felt the goose bumps form on her skin. I kiss her neck.

She laughs, not facing me, but I know she is smiling. She turns to face me, "We are married."

"Yes," I smile back, leaning into her to kiss her deeply. I lean up to pull her closer to me to cuddle her in my arms.

"We have the Aspen souvenir rings to prove it," she says holding up her hand to mine, to admire our rings. She snuggles into my chest. "Are we crazy?" she asks softly.

I kiss the side of her head, "I know you are," I whisper.

She giggles, before leaning her head up to kiss me.