THE AFTERGLOW | | vk

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"I'll be Jeongguk's caregiver," I said and looked at looked nana. she looked shocked but smiled later. "r-really?" she tried to confirm." Taehyung, you know that you don't have to force yourself in this." she assured. I immediately shook my head saying that's not true " Really, nana. I want to be his caregiver. To be honest, I liked Jeongguk already when I met him in the hallway. My happiness doubled when jimin brought him home saying he was the I was supposed to train. I jumped internally. He was so cute and squishable and on top of that, he was so innocent. The way he talks, the way he looks at me, everything about him was beautiful." I looked at nana. " I've already decided to be his caregiver even before we talked earlier." I smiled." but I was so uncertain about his family but now I guess it's not the problem." I looked at nana who was smiling at me and I returned it back but my small dropped at the next thought. " But, nana, Does Jeongguk want me as his caregiver and he never said that he likes me in person," I asked nana worried. she sighed before she spoke. " Taehyung, I can tell you what to do but can't tell him what you feel about him. You know what you feel. It's inside and no one can know it better other than yourself." she cheered me smiling. I nodded. That's true. I know what I have to say. I took a deep breath and made my way towards jeongguk who was busy on the phone and knelt down in front of him. I took a glance at nana. She gave me a nod and reassured me.

"Kookie, I want to talk to Jeongguk. Is it ok for you to slip back to your big space? I promise to let you back into your headspace once I'm done talking for as long as you want ok?. "I requested as he looked at me and pouted." rweally? fo' ash long ash I wan'?" he asked cutely and I nodded excitedly as a reply. He grinned like a happy bunny and stared into space. I let him take his own time. " H-hyung, hi. W-what do you want to talk a-about?" he asked me with his eyes filled with curiosity.

 " Jeongg--" I was interrupted," I-it's ok, Hyung, You can still call me kookie," he said looking at anywhere but my eyes. I smiled at him as I held his hands in mine, softly rubbing them.  Kookie, "I want you to listen carefully to everything I'm going to say and take your time and lemme know your decision. Ok? he nodded and I snorted. "Kookie, I know it has only been around 3 weeks since we met. But I fell for you when I saw you for the first time. You're one of my top reasons for looking forward to a new day. Just thinking of meeting up, hearing your voice, and seeing your beautiful and cute smile is enough to make me happy. I wish I could always feel like I do when I'm with you. I've been struggling with an uneasy feeling for a certain time now, and I think it's time I came straight to the point. Thing is, I really like you. I've liked you since we first became good friends, We've been friends a while now, and I find myself really drawn to you. There's just something that can't be put precisely into words, but I feel like I like you. Not just as a friend, but I like you because we are such good friends. Does that make sense? You know, I think perfection is made up. There are no perfect things, no perfect people. If you want to search for perfection, you'll waste your time. What I like about you so much is that your flaws play nice with mine, and I'd be lucky if you wanted to be more than friends. So, what do you say? I think of you so often that I find myself wondering what's real anymore. If I know one thing for certain is that a reality that I want to live is one in which you're by my side. Do you want to start a new journey with me? Jeongguk, will you be my boyfriend? I'm not the best at putting my feelings into words, but I want to try nonetheless because I really care about you. Well, that's it really, I've said it. I care about you and want to be more than friends. Do you feel the same? and I hope you feel the same way; but if not, that's ok. But lemme tell you this, I care for you no matter what. I will be really glad to be your caregiver. ill help you and little kookie with everything and anything. I Like you for who you are. I won't judge you for having little space and to be honest, it's the cutest thing to deal with. Only a dumb person would deny that it. I promise to be with you till my grave. Even if you reject me, I'll. be there for you as a faithful loyal guardian." I confessed. I spoke my heart out and I'm scared to look at him right now. scared of rejection. I slowly looked at Jeongguk who had a blank face. I guess I'm getting rejected today. I turned around to look at nana who grinned at me with tears in her eyes and I smiled back. 

when I turned and looked at jeongguk who still carried the same expression on his face." you can take your time and give me your reply." I smiled and looked down. I was about to get up when I felt a mass thrown onto me.  I looked down to see Jeongguk hugging me really tight. " H-hyung, I don't need time, I r-really l-like y-you too. I really do." he looked up at me with his innocent doe eyes. His long hair falling onto his forehead and cheeks that had the deepest pink hue on his cheeks. " T-Thank you for a-accepting the r-real me." He continued shyly. " I w-would be really glad If y-you are my c-caregiver and Yes, I'll be your boyfriend. I promise I will not trouble you too much." He confessed hiding his face in the crook of my neck." I cradled him really tight and kissed his forehead lovingly. " You can trouble me as much as you want. Don't restrain yourself from doing anything for me. ok?" He quickly nodded his head in my neck and we relished our moment in each other's arms.

It was evening already. I am still here at the orphanage. Three of us are sitting on the couch. Jeongguk slipped into his headspace and is really clingy and doesn't let go of me. Not like I care. Nana is really happy after what she witnessed. she is really thankful and grateful for jeongguk. 

Jeongguk is watching his favorite movie on my phone, sitting on my lap as he leaned his back on my chest. I held his waist securely so that he doesn't fall down. Nana and I were talking about how to officially bring jeongguk out of the orphanage and shift with me and about his little space. 

" If the child is aged out but is stable financially, he can move outta the orphanage." nana stated. " I can't adopt Jeongguk, nana but will it be ok if I showed my bank balance??" I doubted." yes, you can show them and Jeongguk has to sign the documents which say that he is willing to walking out of the orphanage after he aged out and is living a decent life outside." nana explained. well, that isn't a problem then unless he doesn't want to move out cuz he might miss you. he is really attached to you. isn't he?" I spoke. " He would. As much as I want him to be with me, I want him to have a decent life and explore the world." nana said and smiled looking at jeongguk. " Don't worry, nana. we will visit you every weekend." I assured and bounced Jeongguk who was slipping down from my lap to give him a better position to sit.

 "Taehyung, you have to know few things about Jeongguk in his little space."

"Yes, nana I was going to talk about it." 

" Jeongguk is really sensitive in his little space. He is really clingy. His medical reports show that he is brittle. His bones are little weak and can be cured with a proper calcium diet. I suggest you to take him for a medical check-up once he shifts with you. Talking about his mindset, he has 2 stages of his headspace. Little space i.e 2-4 years of age. Baby space i.e 0-2 years of age. He mostly slips into 2-3 years of age and into his baby space if he gets too carried away or if he feels like getting pampered. Most Importantly, he has to be in his little space for at least 5 days a week. Don't force him to come out of his headspace. Sometimes he gets shy or triggered by some things and resists himself from slipping. Chocolates, candies, lollipops, or any kinda desserts, especially banana milk and toys like stuffed ones and etc trigger him to slip. You never know at what age he wakes from his sleep. So ask him when he wakes up. As I already told you, he needs special treatment and needs in his little space. he loves to dress in baggy clothes which makes him feel comfortable throughout the day. You might wanna have to buy few little space things later.  he might wake up to be 2 or 3 or 4 or maybe like a newborn baby. Don't yell at him. he hates loud noises. He loves watching cartoons. He loves to cuddle and last but not least, never ever leave him alone in one room. There might be chances of him slipping into his baby space if he is overstimulated. There will be more things that you'll come across when start being with him." she explained and I carefully listened and noted things down in my phone. " Oh I forgot, Jeongguk absolutely hates water. he doesn't like to come in contact with water," she stated. That time I remembered how whinny he was being today when I wanted him to shower." Yes, I noticed that today. He almost threw a tantrum saying that he didn't want to bath." I said and nana laughed " you are going have a hassle life to bath him." nana joked " If it's him, I've got no problem to face a hassle." I said and kissed jeongguk's crown a looked at him with adoration.

"Can't wait to start my new life with you and to embark on a new adventure with you. "