That Neighbor of Mine (BxB)

Kabanata 13

Kelly

Zeus had slowly changed. And I'm afraid that it's because of his feelings for me. Alright, I'm giving him the benefit of the doubt but still I am not letting him to keep liking me. He can't like me and he can't be with someone like me.

Isang linggo na ang lumipas simula nang huling usap namin. And in that week, we don't talk. Hindi ako sumasabay sa kanya pauwi. Ang iritasyon ko sa mga pinag gagawa niya ay hindi parin mapawi-pawi. And in that week, everytime I talked with Oddysey, I am feeling so guilty for hiding the truth from her. Hindi ko alam kung totoo nga bang huminto na si Zeus sa panliligaw kay Riva. Sobrang naaawa na ako kay Oddysey.

For the both of them, they kind of always together. Palagi silang ipinagtabi ng mga kaibigan namin. And the teasing won't die too. Zeus face was always the usual everytime I looked at him. Seriously dark and bored face. Napuna nga ni Oddysey iyon one time.

"What's with Zeus? He seems so distant, cold, and unapproachable," Oddysey whispered while we are on the library.

Natigilan ako sa binabasa ko at nag-angat ng tingin sa kanya. She looked so curious and worried at the same time.

I only sighed and shrugged. "I don't know. Bad mood? Nothing's new naman."

"No... I know he always looked unapproachable to strangers but... to us he is kind. But these past days, he seems off. Hindi niya siguro gustong palagi kaming tinutukso? Ano sa tingin mo?" She asked sadly. Nakapangalumbaba at nakatanaw sa labas ng library.

Naaawa na naman ako sa kanya. These must be hard for her. What did Zeus do to her?

"Is he shutting you off?" Napabaling siya sakin at umiling.

"Hindi naman pero parang wala siya sa mood makipag-usap palagi. I think he has a problem."

I sighed. That bastard again. Will he really be shitty to Oddysey?

Not talking to Zeus for a week is not that bothersome. Kasi palagi kaming nagtetext ni France araw-araw. Hindi nga lang namin mahagilap ang isa't-isa sa loob ng campus kasi busy siya masyado. I can't help but to miss him.

Every night, I always hugged the teddy bear he gave me. Nag-iimagine ako na siya ang kayakap ko. I just missed him so bad that I'm being delusional again.

Palagi kong naalala ang huling pagkikita namin at nahihiya ako sa nga nararamdaman sa araw na iyon. Sobrang childish ko kaya sinubukan ko ngayong magpaka-mature. I shouldn't be feeling jealous because he isn't mine nor I'm his.

It was so clear that I and him are just friends. Kaya dapat huminto na ako sa kahibangan ko sa kanya.

Saturday came and just like the last time, France and I went to the gym together again. But unlike last time, I am trying to have self-control now because I might acting immature again.

Hinanda ko ang sarili na kapag makita si Camille at si France ay dapat wala akong maramdaman. But I was wrong, the moment Camille approach us as we went in, I can't help but to lose my mind.

Naghahari na naman sa isipan ko ang pagka-insecure, inis, at... selos. I hate myself for acting like this. I don't like this anymore. Kahit anong pilit kong iwaksi sa sistema ko iyon ay hindi pa rin. I have no control over this emotion I am feeling. It sucks.

My vision blackened and my thoughts was ruled by my irrational thoughts. Umiigting ang bagang ko nang makita na pinisil ni France ang mukha ni Camille. They both laughed at something. The bitterness in me got me so much to the point that I felt envious towards them.

The whole day, hindi ko maiwasang maging tahimik. Labis na irita ang aking naramdaman sa sarili. I can't be this possessive over him, right? This is just not right! Gaya nong huling Sabado, binisita ko si Tamara sa bahay nila. Tamara is getting better and I am happy for her recovery.