𝔼𝕣𝕒𝕤𝕖 𝕎𝕙𝕒𝕥? [ON HOLD]

105.5

The wind blew inside my dorm as I opened my window, an icy attack nipping at my fingers and biting my nose. The frequent puffs of warm air that left me made shapes in the air.

It was 3 am on a school night, and I just couldn't seem to sleep. My boyfriends were cuddled under the covers in my bed, while I sat in the ceil looking out at the stillness of the UA campus.

I had only my pajama shorts and tank to protect me from the cold. It didn't matter though. The cold made me feel alive. Made me feel human.

I didn't know what brought this on, whether it be the mundaneness of my routine or the lack of smiles in the halls, it didn't help me figure out what this awful but peaceful feeling was.

It sat in my chest, around my heart, constricting and pulling me in different directions. It was familiar but terrifying.

Having chills running down my legs, the hair on the back of my neck standing up, and little goosebumps stood at standby; made me feel human. It numbed the burning and saddening feeling in my chest, whisking it off it's feet and dancing it to sleep.

For only a few minutes I felt free. For only a few minutes, I was aware of everything. The tap of my digits against the floor, the steady blowing of the trees, my lovers snoring behind me. It felt perfect, right, and peaceful.

I hear some shuffling, and the pulling of covers. The boys were getting cold. I gave a silent sigh and pulled the window shut. Feeling caged once more as the burning feeling erupted in my chest.

Why was I feeling this? And what did I need desperately that my body was trying to tell me so forcefully?

Maybe I would never know.

But that was okay, I had people who cared and would help me if I ever got too curious. All I had to do was ask.

My eyes finally dropped, and I knew I wasn't going to remember a single thing about this tomorrow. If it was meant to be, things would change, or I would be the change needed.

That's how the universe worked.

~~~

A/n: Yooo 169k reads, funny number guys. :D