Help Me To Heal

1944

Bucky stood outside for a few minutes trying to calm his breathing, his mind racing with images of Lexie and Steve. Steve with his hands running all over her naked body, he imagined what her face looked like, what sounds she made as Steve brought her to her climax. He squeezed his eyes closed, trying desperately to think of something, anything else before the ball of rage in his chest exploded. He thought about how she looked stood at his bedroom door last night saying she needed him, he thought about how she felt this morning with her arms and legs wrapped around him. He thought about her cute hair style and the way she held her coffee cup to warm her hands. His breathing returned back to normal and he went back inside.

After dragging the other armchair and the couch outside, Bucky grabbed a couple of bottles of cola and headed up to check on how Lexie was doing. There was a trash bag full of Steve's toiletries outside the door looks like she's already done the bathrooms then.

He entered the bedroom to find Lexie sat on Steve's side of the bed, cross legged staring at something in her hand with an intense scowl "Chip? You OK?"

No response. He walked closer to see what it was she was staring at, he realised it was a photo of Peggy, probably the one Lexie had mentioned she knew Steve kept in his bedside drawer.
"You're right, she is pretty" Lexie muttered

"Yeah well, she's pretty dead now." Bucky snatched the photo out of her hands and ripped it in to pieces before stuffing it in to a trash bag.

Lexie stared at him, her hand still holding the ghost of the photo, her jaw slack.

"What? You said you wanted to move on from this shit, you're not gonna do that by staring at photos of Peggy. Like I said, bitch is dead." He shrugged

Lexie couldn't contain the laugh that escaped her, it was the hardest she had laughed in a long time, maybe ever. She wiped a tear away "I seriously don't know what I would do without you Buck"

"Well for starters you'd have to drag your own shit outside"

"Speaking of that..."

Bucky rolled his eyes as he drank from the bottle of cola "Oh god, what now?"

She stood up and gestured towards the bed "just the mattress. The bedframe was mine before Steve moved in, but Steve picked the mattress. It's too bloody hard for my liking but he said the softer ones were like sleeping on a marshmallow, and he said it like that was a bad thing"

"Consider it gone" he opened the large bedroom window before dragging the mattress towards it and pushing it out through the window on to the ground below. "You're welcome"

"Erm.. sure." Lexie watched Bucky curiously for a moment "Sorry about before Buck, I took it too far"

Bucky shrugged, trying to be nonchalant "it's whatever. So, how are you going to replace all this stuff?"

"By the magic of the Internet of course! Gonna go find some stuff online I like and order it to be delivered so I don't ever have to leave the comfort of my own home"

Bucky chuckled, knowing how much Lexie hated going out. "Not to pry, but how are you going to afford it? I mean there's a reason my apartment is empty, furniture is expensive and I mean like 10x what it was in the 40s."

"I can't tell you" Lexie looked at the floor, picking nervously at her fingers.

"What? Why? Is it bad?" His expression switched from concerned to a playful smirk "Oh I get it, it's dirty right? You're a porn star or something aren't you?"

Lexie scoffed loudly "what?! No of course not!"

"Oh yeah, that's definitely it" Bucky winked at her