Only Friends

Chapter 58 - Fearless

We woke up the next morning excited to be playing in the final of the World Cup. When I woke up, I thought it was a dream. I thought it was all a dream. But it wasn't. It was entirely, and utterly, real.
I turned over to my phone, seeing the unread message from Jill flash on my screen. I felt guilty. Very guilty. She said she loved me. She loved me and I loved her. What was the issue?

I am vice captain of my team, I can't be doing anything to hurt our chances at winning. I can't do it. The team must come first. And that meant I couldn't think about it. Shouldn't think about it.

Sam and I got out of bed and changed into our uniforms straight away. We were so keen to get going and to get playing. The numbers of 13 and 20 were printed on our backs with Harrison and Kerr written alongside them. Both Kerr and 20 and Harrison and 13 are iconic now.
"We are doing this for 20," I said to her, smiling.
"No, we are doing this for 13," she answered back, before hugging me. Doing it for 13 - doing it for Dad.

Dad has always dreamed of me playing in a World Cup. He always said that he was going to be there. Be in the stadium when I win a World Cup. But he won't. And he never will be. His legacy only lives on in my memories. John Harrison.

I stared out the window, as we drove to the stadium. I was sitting next to Sam, but I was in the window seat. I had my phone open, on the messages tab, deciding whether or not to send Jill a quick text.
"What's wrong?" Sam asked, looking at me.
"Nothing," I answered back.
"Indi, why have you been staring at your phone for the past 20 minutes?" I looked at her, annoyed that she always knew when something was up.
"Jill texted me."
"But I thought you guys were talking."
"She said I love you." Sam looked at me, blankly.
"Oh."
"Yeah. The day before we are set to verse each other in the most important match of our lives."
"Do you love her?" Sam asked, looking at me. I stared back into her eyes, nodding. I did. I love her. I love her more than anything in the world. She is my everything. My person. I know she is. Without her, I have felt incomplete, like part of me is missing. Like I need her. Like I need my Jill. "Then Indi, you need to stop worrying and stop stressing. I love you, but this has been going on for too long! You love her. She loves you. Fuck everything. Fuck everyone. And just do it. You both deserve each other."
"I know. You're right." I laughed slightly, knowing that she was.
"When aren't I?" I leant into her and hugged her, resting my head on her shoulder.

We soon arrived at Stadium Australia, England was set to take on the US first. Kristie was obviously playing in the team, and ended up starting the game. I am glad she is finally starting to get the recognition she deserves. She is one of the best players I have ever played with and against, and it always pissed me off how she was second best in so many teams.

Sam, the rest of the Matildas and I, watched the game from the players viewing area that was allocated to us. We were able to warm up while watching the game.

Within the first 20 minutes, the US had scored, and it was from Kristie. Kristie scored to give her team the lead. I loved that I saw her thriving and soaring, and fulfilling her dreams. After she had scored, she did a heart sign with her hands - a symbol for Sam. When she did this, I turned to Sam.

"For you?" I asked her. She nodded, smiling. She was blushing hard, so incredibly in love with Kristie.

Only 20 minutes later, Kristie then assisted her sister, Sam Mewis, for another goal to give them a 2-0 lead going into half time. I was proud of them both. I loved them both.

As Sam and I were watching the game and warming up, she spoke to me.
"Inds, can you give the pep talk before the game?"
"Yeah, sure, why?" I asked her.
"I just don't know what to say." I gave her a hug, knowing that nerves were getting the better of her. She never normally felt nerves on this level, but this is a World Cup final. It is something we've never experienced.
"Play fearlessly," I said to her, "that's when you do your best."
"But what if my best isn't good enough."
"You're Sam Kerr!" I said, holding her shoulders to look at me, "best striker in the world. Go out there and play the way you know how. Play like the little 12 year old who just wanted to have fun and didn't give to shits about making it anywhere. Play like her!" Sam nodded, and we continued to warm up.

As the bronze medal game wrapped up, with the US taking the 2-0 win, Kristie was interviewed and her voice was bouncing off the stadium.
"Kristie Mewis, congratulations on the third place finish. You had an amazing game yourself, talk us through it."
"Yeah, we were obviously upset to not be in the final, but we knew we wanted to go out there and get the bronze, and I'm happy we were able to do that." Her American accent is very obvious when she speaks to an Australian interviewer.
"So, we all know you and your sister, Sam, have an amazing relationship, tell us about how that transfers on the field. We saw you assist her for a goal, and that must have been pretty special."
"Yeah, it's amazing playing with Sam. Obviously as my sister, we have this amazing relationship and bond and I am really lucky to be able to have this experience and share it with my family."
"Lastly, who are you supporting in the final?" The interviewer asked, laughing.
"Matildas, obviously! Go Sammi and Indi!" She said into the microphone.
"That'll get this crowd to like you. Good job Kristie on the bronze medal."
"Thank you!"

Once we all got into the locker room, I knew I needed to say something to Jill. I couldn't leave her on an unread message before the game. I sent a quick message. I said:

Indi: I'm sorry. Good luck.

I'm not sure what I was sorry about. Was it for not answering her message last night, or lying to her for the past three years? From keeping truths from her that she deserved to know? I'm not sure. I guess I never will be.

I then turned my phone off, not wanting to see if she would reply or not. I got the girls to huddle as I gave the pep talk Sam wanted me to do.

"Girls," I said, as we all came together, "I want each and everyone of you to play fearlessly. Play with your heart on your sleeve because that is our brand, that is what we do. We don't play dirty, we don't play with greed or anger or malice. We play with fight and determination and grit. Don't lose yourself in this battle, but give everything you have because this, this is our chance. Our chance to fulfill our dreams, our goals. Give everything, absolutely everything. OK, everyone?" Everyone nodded and cheered, ready to go out there and play with our entire heart.

We walked out onto the field, and lined up, seeing nearly 80,000 Australians sporting the green and gold. I knew in the crowd Mum and Luke sat there, wearing the number 13. I loved that I got to play a World Cup final in front of them. Most of the girls' family and loved ones came for the game, to show their support. Kristie, after her game, went and sat in the stands also. We sang the national anthem with pride, smiling the entire time, not able to wipe the grin off our faces.

After shaking hands with the referees, the game commenced. I tried to take Jill out of my head, not wanting to think about the fact I was playing her in the most important matches of our lives. As the first whistle blew, I was ready to play. I was ready to win. I was ready to fulfil my dream. One of my dreams...

Note:
- a few more chapters left, this is so sad
- not sure if I'll do a sequel to this straight away, I might do an entirely new story line.. let me know if there r any couples/players you really like etc
- get excited cause the next one is gonna be a good one