𝐖𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐖𝐞 𝐖𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐔𝐬

Part 21 ~ Find You

Anika's Point Of View ~

There was no questions. 

I told Darren that Michael was just an old friend. Someone I used to go to school with and we have been catching up since I have been back in town. He is good that way, Darren. But I think back and it hurts me so. Michael didn't stay long, not at all. Simple introductions were made on both parts before Michael just . . left. Darren went back inside the house. But I stayed at the door. My eyes showing nothing but gloom as I watched his retreat. I couldn't take my eyes off him. He got to his car, but then he turned around. 

To look back at me. 

Before he got into his car, driving away. I closed my eyes after that. Putting my head down. He was so sad. I'm so sorry, Michael. I'm so sorry. I give a smile. A small wave to Darren. I watch as he goes through security, on his way to his flight. Back home. I'm staying here still of course. I'm not going back yet. Grandmother still needs much looking after and I'm still all she has. But I need more help. It's something I know I need to look more into. I can't do it on my own no more. 

There is Lisa. 

She still helps me out. She minds grandmother, keeping an eye on her because I don't want her to be on her own. I asked Lisa if she could today, but she couldn't. She told me she has a brunch on. Catching up with her sister. Which is very nice. But she did tell me she is able to check in on grandmother once she gets home. That is fine. I left grandmother with her books. I don't know what else to do. I'm just hoping it will keep her occupied for a while. I watch as Darren gets through, picking up his bag once it comes back to him as she waits on the other end of the baggage scanner - getting the all clear. He turns around, giving me a final wave. I wave back, watching as he turns the corner and is then gone. I take a deep breath once he disappears. My hands taking a hold of my jacket from either side, bringing it together and in front of me. My arms crossed. I make my way to the exist, back towards my car. 

But I'm not going back to grandmothers . . not just yet. 

I need to go and see Michael. 

I know I shouldn't but I can't ignore this feeling. I drive out of the car park, back onto the main road. Mind drifting. I once more picture Michael's face when he saw Darren. I wanted to put my arms around him. Protect him. But I couldn't. That feeling inside me as I knew that I wasn't allowed to do that . . ugh. I can't even describe it. I could honestly feel my heart break in that moment. But I'm not a stranger to that feeling. Not at all. It has happened to me before . . 10 years ago. When I left. When I left Michael. And I'm still picking up the pieces from that. I watch as everything passes by. Each street different from the last. My heart pounding with each turn. I don't know what I will say to Michael when I see him. I guess I'll figure it out once he's standing in front of me. I'm looking out, making sure I don't miss it. I look at the address again. His address. 

It's this block. 

I find a park just outside, turning my car off. I probably should've called him but . . that will take more time. I just want to see him. So fucking badly. 

Now I'm on the floor. I see the number. The front door is before me. This is it. This is Michael's apartment. I knock, waiting for an answer. I don't even know if he is home or not. It's been a few seconds and still nothing. Maybe Michael isn't home after all. I won't lie, I'm sad. But just as I'm about to turn around, the door opens. He is home. My question has only just now been confirmed. 

"Michael. Hi . . " I say, my voice shaking. 

Michael stares at me, not knowing what to say. I don't blame him to feel that way. Oh god. Does Michael even want me here? What if he wants me to leave?