Of Gears and Humanity

| 05.1

[ELENA]

"Okay, Carmine, stop being a stubborn horse!"

With my hand around Carmine's reins, I tugged, pulling him through towards the ends of the forest. We'd been walking for four hours, dodging tree branches and hopping over rocks, to make it back to the desolate ends of my side of the Earth. The Gate was within reach; I could see the tall, metal and stone exterior of it just beyond the trees.

As much as it excited me, knowing I could hurry over and see if I'd lost my journal there, it scared me.

And Carmine, too.

He refused to move. His legs conveniently found a muddied puddle, each hoove digging into the earth to keep still. I had to let him go or else I would've fallen. While I wasn't in my best attire, I there wasn't a need to be drenched in water and dirt.

Turning to face him, I huffed, hands at my side. I questioned his loyalty; a royal horse does everything its leader commands. And up until now, Carmine had been ever attentive. Had I done something wrong? I looked into his eyes and tried to figure out what it is I'd done.

He blinks, huffed, and grunted, all in one motion.

I could only sigh. "All right, Carmine." My hands were on my hips. "What have I done to you? Or haven't done? Hm?"

Carmine turned his head, showing me just one of his dark eyes. He slowly blinked as he let out a slow breath. And yet, still, I didn't understand him. Frowning, I reached for the satchel handing on his side. From it, I pulled out a leather pouch filled with water and a bowl. When I presented the items to him, he huffed and closed his eyes.

"Carmine." Kneeling before him, I placed the bowl on a dry patch of land. The top of the pouch twisted easily in my hand. "Are you thirsty? Is that it? We have been riding for a while and I hadn't really given you the time to prepare for tonight's ride. That is my fault, I know."

Carmine may have opened one eye to glance down at the bowl, but he didn't move towards it. He wouldn't drink. Still crouched, I poured water into it. "Please, drink up, Carmine. It'll help you."

Nothing. No movement. Only grunts and deep, heavy sighs came from my horse.

I growled as I stood, quickly closing the pouch before I gripped it at my side. Moonlight crept in from the treetops, and as if we needed it, cast a light directly over us, which was perfect. I wanted Carmine to see every detail of irritation on my face.

"I don't understand you, Carmine. What is it? Whatever it is that's bothering you, you need to somehow tell me now, because this—" With the hand gripping the pouch, I used it to point behind me, at the wall so close, yet so far. "—I can see the Gate! All we need to do is approach it, search the walls for mama's journal. That is it, that is all."

Carmine's hooves dug deeper in the mud. He lowered his head and closed his eyes.

"Are you apologizing?" I crossed my arms. "Or are you standing firm on your decision not to follow me?"

With his head still lowered, he pulled one leg out of the mud. I thought he'd approach me, willingly come in my direction, but no. He didn't. His leg moved back. Another followed.

I scoffed and squeezed my eyes shut. "You're not coming with me, then? Are you saying I should go alone?"

Another leg. And another leg. Carmine huffed as he shook his head.

"Well, aren't you cruel?" Leaning forward, I poured the rest of the water into the bowl and nudged it closer to the mud. "At least I will leave you with water to ensure you're well because I am nice!" Grumbling, I took a step back and narrowed my eyes. "Unlike some... horses."

*

There was a howling in the wind. Loud. Possibly dangerous. When I was a child, I was taught to fear it, but having stepped this close to the Gate today, I knew there was nothing to fear from the sound. It could have simply been a bird. A large bird.

As I pushed myself to walk alone through the dead ends of the forest, I told myself there was nothing to fear from a flying animal. I knew the eagles close to Homestead weren't large enough to hurt a human; being closer to the Gate wouldn't make them any bigger.

Once the trees overhead cleared and I was able to see the night sky, and saw nothing, I laughed. Nervously. "See," I told myself as I looked back ahead at the Gate and its shimmering lights, "there's nothing there."

Nothing there. Nothing to make a noise. It's a ghost more than likely.

Another howl echoed in the air and a chill ran up my spine. I quickly turned back, hoping to see Carmine's silhouette; hoping just the thought of his presence could give me some calm, some peace. But no, I couldn't make out the outline of my horse. All I saw was death and decay.

I laughed again as I turned back, hastening my steps. "Ah, wonderful, wonderful, wonderful," I muttered. "Just wonderful."

The Gate was different at night. It was brighter than it was in the daylight. The stones with electricity hummed louder, the flickering lights reacting quicker. Perhaps the moon made it change, or the hour. It wasn't as hot as it'd been in the day. As I approached the wall, I found I wasn't uncomfortable.

At least, I wasn't until I reached the area I'd climbed to sit at the very top. The very same spot where I sat above all to look over the edge, to see the shadow rushing in my direction.

"Wonderful..." There was nothing on the ground. Just the same rocks and small pieces of rubble littered the border of the wall.

For a moment, I paced. I searched up and down, even looked at the top of the wall to see if my bag had caught on a crack along the edge. But there was nothing there. Nothing but shadows, lines, and shimmering lights.

Taking in a deep breath, I let myself drop to my knees. My head quickly followed into the palms of my hands. "This isn't wonderful at all."

*

[Thank you for reading! <3]