Therapy

Part 15

Trigger Warning: Talking about Suicide attempt/depression/anxiety

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They both slept some that night, Carina waking up from a nightmare around midnight, and her movement woke Maya. The blonde helped her girlfriend fall back to sleep before spending the next three hours just staring at the ceiling. She was exhausted and feeling so guilty and just wanted to stop hurting everyone she loved.

Finally, Maya rolled over and took another one of her sleeping pills, desperate to get some more rest. When she woke up next, Carina was not in bed. Maya debated getting up, but decided she wasn't ready yet. It was only 7 am so she had a little time before she needed to get up. About twenty minutes later, the bedroom door opened and Carina came in.

"Good morning Bella," Carina said, smiling at her.

"Hey," Maya said, rubbing her eyes.

"You need a shower," Carina said, offering a hand to Maya.

The blonde sat up, taking a deep breath before she stood up.

"Do you want me to join you?" Carina asked, brushing a piece of hair off Maya's face.

Maya thought for a minute before nodding, "But just for a shower."

"Of course," Carina nodded as they both went into the bathroom.

After the shower, Carina dressed for work while Maya dressed in a pair of sweats and a t-shirt. Carina brought Maya a smoothie she had made her before disappearing again. She came back in a few minutes later.

"I have to go now Bella," Carina said, sitting down on the bed, "I'm working 24 hours so Jo will be here this morning, Teddy will be here for a few hours this afternoon, and Andy is coming to spend the night."

Maya nodded, hating that she was being watched around the clock, but knowing better than to argue about it because this was the only way Carina could keep her sanity.

"Have a good day at work," Maya said, sitting up and kissing Carina.

"I hope therapy goes well," Carina said, "Text or call me after if you need to?"

"I will," Maya said, nodding, "And I'm here if you need me."

"I'll see you later," Carina said, getting up.

Carina headed out as Jo walked into the bedroom.

"Hi Maya," the general surgeon said, "Can I sit?"

Maya nodded a little, snuggling under the blankets.

"You know I went through something like this last year?" Jo said, sitting down, "It sucked. All I wanted was for all of it to stop, and there were days when it felt like it never would, like I would be stuck in my bed, drowning in my head, forever."

"How did you get out?" Maya asked quietly.

"I trusted the people who wanted to help me," Jo said honestly, "And some days, I still just want to stay in bed, and some days, I do. I don't think it ever really goes away, but it does get better."

Maya nodded, not really knowing what else to say.

"What time is your appointment?" Jo asked.

"Ten," Maya said, "But we need to leave here at like 9:30."

"Alright," Jo said, "What do you want to do until then?"

Maya just shrugged, burying herself into the blankets. Jo sighed, deciding to work on charts. The time flew by, and soon enough, it was time to go to Maya's therapy. Jo drove them there, Maya silent the whole time.