Therapy

Part 4

Trigger Warning for this chapter and pretty much every single chapter from here on out: Anxiety and Depression 

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"Did you sleep?" Dr. Lewis asked as she walked into Maya's office, smiling as the captain handed her a cup of coffee.

"Kinda," Maya said, nodding as they sat down, "I mean, more than I did last week, but still not great, but I think the meditation is helping at least a little bit."

"Are you feeling better than you did last week?" Dr. Lewis asked.

Maya shrugged, "I think so. I did what you said and wrote down what made me anxious when I was trying to sleep and it was really helpful."

"Good," Dr. Lewis said, "Is there anything on that list you want to talk about?"

Maya shrugged, looking down at her notebook.

"I talked to Jack," Maya said, "And I wrote a letter to Carina. I wanted to talk to her, but we've barely seen each other in the past few days because of our schedules. We are going to be home together tomorrow though so I'll talk to her then. I need to talk to Andy, but Sullivan got admitted to the hospital again for some post-op complication and something came up with her mom and I don't want to bother her right now."

"How did it go?" Dr. Lewis asked, "Talking to Jack."

"It went well," Maya said, thinking back on her conversations with her friends, "Better than I anticipated."

She started with telling Dr. Lewis about her conversation with Jack.

"Gibson," Maya said, calling to one of her Leuitenants as he was walking out.

"Yes Captain," Jack said, walking into the office, his bag slung over his shoulder.

"Are you busy right now?" Maya asked, taking a deep breath.

"Not with anything that can't wait," Gibson said, shaking his head, "What's up?"

"Can you close the door?" Maya said before stopping him, "And can you open the blinds?"

Jack nodded, doing as he was instructed before turning to face his captain.

"Can you sit?" Maya asked, not really making eye contact with him.

"Is something going on?" Jack asked, "Am I getting transferred or something because..."

"I'm sorry," Maya spilled out, cutting him off.

"What?" Jack said, looking confused.

"I'm sorry," Maya said again, "I'm sorry for how I have treated you for the past few months. I'm sorry I broke up with you to get Captain and I'm sorry I acted like you meant nothing to me and I'm sorry I used you for sex when I was pissed off and hurting a few weeks ago. I'm sorry I threw you going to therapy in your face. I'm sorry I let you and Rigo go out in the field together and that you have had to deal with that, and I'm sorry I have been such a shitty friend, captain, and person to you lately. I'm sorry I broke your trust and our friendship or whatever it was before we started hooking up. I just... I'm just sorry."

"Who are you and what have you done with my friend Maya?" Jack said, laughing a little before looking at her and seeing the tears she was trying to keep out of her eyes, "Hey. Thank you. It really means a lot that you said all that. I'm sorry too, for being so hard on you when you got Captain and for letting you have sex with me. I knew it was wrong and that you had Carina, but I didn't try to stop you."