The Solitude of an Emperor [TO BE UNPUBLISHED]

4: Grand Burial to Celebrate

After a long wait for this time to come, Amara has finally got the chance to go to the Imperial palace after forcing her father to go along with him. All nobles were called to the palace for a meeting and she tagged along to go to the Imperial palace's library. She does not want to meet Esteban yet and she is not ready to face him.

She was left with her personal maid after her father went to the main palace. Feeling cold, she could only look at the palace where she grew up. She could only look at the same palace she built five years ago. Seeing it in this view and in another body, she could convince herself to accept the fact that she is no longer the Emperor and that she cannot serve the people like before.

"My lady?" Her personal maid, Silla, noticed her lady staring at the main palace and got worried because she looked really sad. Lately, she can see that her lady is like a lifeless doll that had sorrowful eyes.

"Silla," Amara said, "Tell, does this place look cheerfully colourful?"

Silla got confused upon another random question from her lady. She had been struggling on how she could answer her difficult questions that had deep meanings. She looked at the palace and stared at it. By the structure of it, it is beautiful and magnificent, however, as she looked around and saw the few knights just standing to guard and was barely looking active, she felt a strange feeling of doom.

Somehow, Silla ended up speaking words she did not mean, "It's awful." Upon unintentionally uttering it, she covered her mouth and looked around if ever someone heard her. "Please forgive me, my lady!" Silla immediately apologised.

"Right?" Amara sneered a little with the honest opinion. She started walking. "You do not have to worry about your opinion being heard." She made her way to the Imperial library. "The trees and the walls have no ears unless ignorant people will make up creative stories," she continued.

Silla got silenced upon hearing what her lady said. She got troubled with every statement Amana says. It is either colloquial or connotatively formal. It is worrying her, as a maid sent by the Crown Prince. Lady Amara simply had her memories forgotten after the incident happened during the Crown Prince's birthday banquet. She seems to have really lost memories as she did not even realize that she is not her real personal maid. She doesn't even know that her personal maid was executed after failing to protect her.

It was the birthday banquet of the Crown Prince and as usual, as his fiancé, Lady Amara should stand out. However, at that time, Lady Amara was looking pale even after wearing makeup. It is because she was not feeling well that time and she is feeling really tired and wanted to sleep. Doing her duty as the Crown Prince's first dance, Lady Amara got both mentally and physically pressed.

When Lady Amara decided to take a break after the banquet, she decided to go to the balcony and found the Crown Prince holding a woman in his arms. She was so shocked that she could not speak and just found herself running from the banquet hall, feeling betrayed. Unfortunately, she fell on the grand staircase that caused her head to bleed. She was immediately brought to treatment and she did not wake up within a month.

The Crown Prince was bothered thinking of what would happen if Lady Amara tells his father, the Emperor, about what she saw. He knows that it will affect his position if rumours get spread out. There he took the blame to Lady Amara's personal maid and executed her for failing to protect the lady. He then hired Silla as her new personal maid. However, when Lady Amara woke up, everything was fine and she did not know anything about what happened.

Silla made a report to the Crown Prince about her lady's condition after waking up and it was a relief to the Crown Prince. But now that Silla is serving Lady Amara for more than a month, she could not believe that such a good and intelligent woman was being controlled by the Crown Prince. She also could not believe the Crown Prince to be playing with this lady's heart when she is clearly a better woman than the woman he was cheating with.

Silla took a secret glance to her lady who's walking ahead of her. 'Should I tell her about the Crown Prince?' She is not particularly siding one of them, she is just doing this to get money for her siblings. If she tells her lady about it, what would happen to her? What would the Crown Prince do to her? Can Lady Amara protect her from the Crown Prince?

"You can tell me what it is, Silla." Amara suddenly stopped and Silla's eyes went wide and got nervous that her lady could actually tell if she was looking at her from the back. How the hell did she know that she is looking at her from the back? And how did she even know that she is thinking of telling her something?

Lady Amara turned back to look at Silla who's now sweating. When Silla looked at her lady's eyes, she got intimidated that she could tell that if she opens her mouth, she is going to tell everything.

"It's... It's nothing, my lady." Her fingers trembled and she bit her lower lips out of nervousness.

"You tend to bite your lips when you tell a lie, Silla."

Silla flinched and realised what she just did. She was caught.

"Is it about the Crown Prince cheating on me?"

Silla's eyes went wide as her heart almost jumped out her chest. Her whole body trembled upon meeting her lady's intimidating eyes and it felt like her soul went out of her body. She knew about it all along?

"You do not have to worry, Silla." Amara tapped her head before continuing to walk.

Silla could only follow her while looking down, feeling like she is with a powerful person. She does not know but just by hearing her lady say she does not need to worry, she already changed her mind and sided with Lady Amara. From the first day she served Lady Amara, she could already tell that she will become a powerful woman in the future. And now, she is certain that she will serve this lady for the rest of her life.

Amara immediately looked for books relating to the Imperial family when they arrived at the library. She then looked for the books relating to the former Emperor and what surprised her is that she only found very little details about her death.

'Emperor Darya died in her sleep due to an unknown illness that was later discovered to be sleep paralysis. Duke Esteban, her male consort, mourned for her death. He held a grand burial to commemorate her death and her achievements as one of the greatest Emperors...'

She closed the book and put it back on. She then immediately walked out of the library to breathe as she felt suffocated to everything she just read. As she walked to the hallway while Silla was following her, she felt like her mind was going to blow up because of too much thinking.

Grand burial? Her husband, Duke Esteban knows that she doesn't like to have a grand burial during her death. And it is a custom in the Imperial family that there shall be no grand burial to be held during a royalty's death. Her husband, her only husband, knows that!

Amara ended up going to the garden and silently cried there. Her chest felt like it was being crumpled and it felt hard to breathe. Silla could only watch her lady and wondered what she had read that made her cry like this. She wanted to comfort her but she is also feeling guilty of deceiving her. She is thinking if she even deserves to comfort her.

After a few minutes, Amara finally stopped crying. Silla offered her a handkerchief. She took it and wiped her tears. There they were engulfed with silence until she finally spoke.

"I am not Lady Amara, Silla."

Silla got confused by what her lady said. Amara turned back to face her.

"Lady Amara met her death a month ago."

***
END OF CHAPTER FOUR
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