Ain't No Mountain High Enough

"When Doves Cry"

I went through a bit of a crisis on my walk with Mr. Santos, but he didn't seem to notice my internal panic. I just couldn't imagine sitting there in that wheelchair for the rest of my life. I couldn't imagine being paralyzed forever.

Mr. Santos kept talking. "Anyway," he said. He paused to take a breath. "What I'm trying to say is that you shouldn't limit yourself just because you're paralized. Lord willing, you'll have a long time yet to live. You should do something with it."

I nodded, though I wasn't really listening anymore. Was I too young for a mid-life crisis? Now I just really wanted to go back home, but I didn't want to look rude.

Luckily, a car pulled up, and I quickly recognized it to be mine. The window rolled down and Keto was staring at me with wide eyes. "What are you doing out here?" He asked it like I was committing a horrible crime by being outside.

I narrowed my eyes. "Uh, obviously I'm having a conversation here," I said. There it was again. I could feel my internal volcano about to erupt. It seemed like everything set it off back in those days.

Keto sighed. "Well, let me come with you."

Mr Santos only smiled again, waving his free hand at Keto. "Oh, don't underestimate him, Mr. Osvaldo. He's managing just fine on his own."

I gave Keto a firm look to confirm what Mr. Santos said, and he didn't look happy about it, but he eventually rolled the window down and drove to the parking lot. He must have been coming home from school...which meant I could ask him about the late car payment.

I bid farewell to Mr. Santos now that I had a valid reason for leaving, then made my way back to the apartment. Before I even reached the door, I could hear Keto and Veronica duking it out in the living room. I peeked through the window and spotted Keto waving the bill around and pointing at Veronica like this whole thing was her fault. I mean, maybe it was. They failed to explain everything to me, so who knew.

I went inside, and the arguing instantly turned to silence. Veronica had ditched her headset, and the game was paused. Both her and Keto were staring at me now. Well, this was awkward.

"Why didn't you tell me you were leaving?!" Veronica suddenly shouted.

My internal volcano was rumbling. "Because I can do things by myself!" I pointed at Keto. "You have some explaining to do!"

Keto glared at Veronica, then huffed in frustration and disappeared into the kitchen with the bill in hand.

"Now he's mad at me," Veronica complained as she plopped back down in the bean bag. She put her headset back on and unpaused the game, but she had lost the enthusiasm she had been playing with before I left.

I left her to pout and chased Keto down. I was surprised to find him just standing there in the middle of the kitchen, apparently waiting for me. I expected him to try and avoid whatever conversation was about to take place.

"Okay, okay," he said upon seeing my crossed arms and interrogating glare. He rubbed the back of his neck. "We...didn't have enough for the car payment this month..."

"We've never had that problem before," I said. I tried not to sound so angry, but it couldn't be helped at this point.

Keto shifted around, his eyes darting around the room but never actually landing on me. "Well...things have just been a little tighter I guess, with...with you not working anymore."

The sound of the air conditioning kicking on filled the brief silence that followed. Well, what did I expect? Of course things would be tight without me to chip in. We had all decided to move in together after a lot of planning and the assurance that the three of us together could afford everything. Keto had gotten a job at GameStop, Veronica was already working at Chick-Fil-A (and she sometimes got paid to do other people's homework, and sometimes that could pay very well). Before the accident, I had been working at a warehouse. It required me to be able to lift heavy things and stuff, but obviously I couldn't do everything I had been doing before now. I barely gave quitting a second thought. I hadn't considered what it might do to us financially.

"We still had some medical bills to pay off," Keto continued. "Well...we still do, actually." He shrugged. "Don't blame yourself though, you couldn't help it."

"Why didn't you say something before?"

Again, he wouldn't look at me. In fact, this time he didn't even answer. And honestly, I didn't want him to. I just knew what he would say. Was it that he and Veronica didn't want me working? So what, would I just be a burden now?

I took a deep breath and closed my eyes. When Keto still didn't reply, I decided to just leave. I went to my room and up to my desk. It was covered in old homework and textbooks and whatnot that I still haven't cleaned up. I hadn't really cleaned my room since the accident.

I turned on my desktop, but I stared at the forest scene that appeared while I tried to figure out what exactly I wanted to do on it. I hadn't turned it on in weeks. Man, what was I doing with myself?

I got on Google and started looking for jobs.

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Listen to "When Doves Cry" by Prince!

Peace ✌ ~ A.J.