Ain't No Mountain High Enough

"All Out of Love"

After I explained everything, Arjun heaved a sigh. "You really did blow it," he said. I could practically see the rage burning just under his skin, like he was suddenly going to spontaneously combust. "Your ego is going to get you killed one of these days."

I guessed he was right, but I wasn't about to admit that. See? There's my pride talking again.

After the trip to the emergency room, where I got my wrists bandaged up thanks to spraining them, Arjun took me home. I had closed my bank account so the robbers couldn't use my credit card, but that didn't change the fact I had fifty dollars in cash in the wallet. It made me sick. From what it seemed, the police were going to do what they could, but I didn't hold my breath. Good things hadn't happened to me in awhile, and I didn't expect them to start anytime soon.

Valerie never texted me back after I told her I was okay. I could only imagine the rage she was feeling. Whenever Valerie was angry, her glare was like an ice pick, and her very presence made you feel like you would suddenly freeze to death. I was glad I wasn't around her. But...I wanted to apologize. I wanted to make things right between us before she left. I couldn't have this event hanging over me while she was off in Boston.

When we got home and Arjun went back to work, Keto gave me a terribly long lecture. He was angrier than I'd ever seen him. In fact, I wouldn't be surprised if he burst out crying. I just took it. It made some of my guilt go away, since I knew I deserved every bit of it.

Veronica was silent, but I could tell she was upset. Eventually, she put her hand on Keto's shoulder and told him to shut up. He did what she said, but he gave me the most hurt look I've ever seen him pull before he disappeared into his room, leaving me and Veronica to stare at each other.

"Why'd you do it?" Veronica asked, her arms crossed. "You had Valerie worried sick. She was texting us all, but no one knew where you were."

I stared down at my hands. "I know, I know."

Veronica gave me a look when I didn't say anything else, making me sigh.

"We had a fight, okay?" I blurted out. "She told me she's leaving for Boston in January with her boyfriend, and she gave me back that necklace, and it all just piled up, I guess."

"So you blew up at her?" Veronica asked. She dropped her arms to her sides and plopped on the sofa. "You have anger issues."

I almost snapped at her, but that would only prove her point. I did have anger issues. The internal volcano had a name for a reason. For the first time since my last doctor's appointment, the name of that therapist popped in my head. Charlotte Henderson. That was it, right? My hands turned to fists. I still didn't want to go dump my problems on a stranger. I didn't want to be in therapy. I could take care of things myself.

When the silence got too much for Veronica, she raked her fingers through her unruly curls. "You should apologize to Valerie," she said in a monotone voice. "You need to get over her already. She's got a boyfriend, and if she's moving to Boston with him like you said, I say they're on the fast-track to getting married." She leaned forward on the sofa and had a face like she was sternly talking to a child. "Randall, whatever was between you two is over. But I'm sure it has nothing to do with the accident."

My breath caught in my throat at the pain that sprung up in my chest as Veronica talked. It was finally getting driven into my thick skull. I lost Valerie. The truth threatened to drown me. Valerie was the only girl I ever loved. I thought our relationship would go places. But one day, it just started to disappear. Nothing happened between us, but we just stopped acknowledging the feelings we had for each other. Maybe...she fell out of love with me. Maybe it really wasn't the accident that made her decide to date another guy, and Veronica was right. Maybe Valerie just stopped loving me a long time ago and I never even noticed.

"Randall, why don't you get some rest?" Veronica said, drowning out the sound of my heart breaking into tiny little pieces. Her eyes studied me with worry in them. "You'll feel better in the morning, and maybe the police will find those guys and get your wallet back."

I just nodded. I was pretty tired, but I doubted I'd feel better in the morning. I was so done I let Veronica take the handles of my wheelchair and push me to my room. She helped me into bed, and gave me a pair of pajamas, then went off to her own room. I sat there staring at the pajamas — which were actually just an old T-shirt and shorts — trying to figure out if I really wanted to go through the trouble of putting them on, then decided against it. Clothes were clothes, I guess, and my sweatshirt was comfy enough.

Before I laid down and tried to sleep, I sent Valerie another text.

Me: I'm really sorry about tonight. I shouldn't have gone off like that. I know you're having a hard time.

There was nothing for a few minutes, then the three dots appeared to let me know she was responding. It went on for a good five agonizing minutes before it suddenly stopped. But a text never came.

Ten minutes. Twenty.

Half an hour. Then an hour.

She never responded.

I finally gave up and put my phone on the nightstand. If we had the money, I would've gone to fix the screen the next day. At least a cracked screen isn't as bad as a cracked relationship.

I laid in the dark and tried to sleep, but I just kept envisioning the events of the night like a broken record.

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Listen to Air Supply's "All Out of Love"!

Peace ✌️ ~ A.J.