Melancholic Tears Of Tear (PGS #3)

Chapter 31

"There he is, Rae... Your father, Raphael Miller."

The man opened his eyes and turned his head to face us. When our eyes met, all the cool that I have with me, was gradually being covered by a strong feeling. My palms started to get sweaty, and I felt a fluttery nervous feeling in my stomach. It was dread, anger, and anxiety combined.

While I kept a poker face, his eyes held surprise, astonishment, and longing. He slowly rose up from his seat while staring at me in disbelief.

"Go ahead, Rae," Tita Lena muttered, giving me a nod and warm smile. "I'll leave you two first, so that you can talk. I'll call you for lunch, okay?"

Wala na akong nagawa kung hindi tumango sa kaniya, at nang tuluyan na siyang umalis, wala na akong ibang nagawa kundi lingunin ang Tatay ko nang sambitin niya ang pangalan ko.

"Rae Essence," he called.

It was the first time hearing my father's voice, and it held a tone of longing as he called my name.

Walang imik na lumapit ako sa mesa at tumayo sa upuang katapat ng sa kaniya.

"Please, have a seat... Uhm, what do you want? Do you want some refreshments? A cake—"

"Tito David said you're my father," I said as I took a sit, cutting him off.

I didn't know why my voice sounded so cold but it just came out naturally. But clearly, I wasn't here for some snacks.

He was taken aback at what I said or maybe because of the way I said it. He almost looked like he was hurt by it. But then he managed to give me a weak smile and a multiple nods, after taking his seat.

"You are my daughter."

Staring straight at his eyes right now, it was like staring at my own eyes in the mirror. Tito David and Tita Lena were right, I got my eyes from him. They were the same shade of hazel, and the same shape of almond as mine. He has a proud nose, chiseled jawline, pale lips, and grey stubble covered both sides of his face and chin. But now that I saw my father's face for the first time, something was telling me that I've already met someone who looked like a younger version of him.

Even though I have no doubts too, that he's my father, I just had to challenge him, or perhaps I didn't want to make things easier for him.

"How can you be so sure of that? They keep telling me that my Mom ran away. She didn't even tell you that she was pregnant with me. She also did not tell me about you, not even once. What if it's because you're not my father?"

He smiled like he was amused by my question but there was pain and a glint of guilt in his eyes as he tried to look away.

"I'm sorry, it's all my fault... I told her while we're in the beginning of dating that I couldn't afford to have a child yet."

Para naman akong nakaramdam ng biglang pagbaon ng isang matulis na patalim sa 'king dibdib. I fisted my hand under the table to constrain my emotions. I scoffed like it was something funny and looked away before the disappointment and pain became evident in my eyes.

"So I was unwanted in the first place. My mother was just protecting me all along."

Pinigilan ko ang sarili na maluha nang muling magbalik sa alaala ko ang mga hikbi ni Nanay habang nagpapanggap akong tulog. It hurt me knowing the truth, but I knew it hurt her a million times.

"No, please, listen," he begged, "if only I knew she was pregnant that time... If only she told me, I would be the happiest man alive! I love your Mom so much that I was ready to drop everything to live a simple life with her! But then she left without a word... She just left me like she was a dream who pushed me back to reality."