As If We Never Said Goodbye (JENLISA)

Why are we trying so hard?

Lisa held the metal bar with both hands as she pushed the cart across the concrete floor. The wheels creaked from the weight of the suitcases, the afternoon sun shining through the white clouds and reflecting off the yellow of the cabs lined up beside the curb. It was just as she remembered it. The smells, the sounds, everything was exactly as she had left it a week ago. It was what she imagined when she closed her eyes on the boat two nights before, and what she wasn't  prepared to see again.

She pushed the cart aside and removed both bags with a low snort. Jennie looked at the girl at the same moment, smiling brightly. As she smiled back, Lisa tried to breathe through her nervousness, to push it away as they waited for a cab. But it had no effect. They had spent the whole evening talking about everything but landing in New York, which was nothing new. They were both thinking. They both knew it was coming. And still they said nothing. Lisa imagined that this was the reason she was so nervous. Everything was still so uncertain between them.

How hard it is to just ask 'are we going to be okay? It's a simple question.

But every time Lisa thought about speaking, she heard Jennie's words from when they were in Hoi An, saying time after time that she didn't know. So the blonde pushed the thought away and continued to play with the girl's fingers as they rested on the armrest. She let the simple gesture consume her until it was all she saw. All she wanted to see. Just her and Jennie, for a few hours.

As she ran her fingers through Jennie's, the brunette looked up with a lazy smile, her eyes going from her lips ajar to the two of their hands. She was so lost in it, her face telling Lisa that she didn't want to land either. And looking at the girl now, she seemed as calm as they were on the plane, but her eyes said otherwise.

Lisa could see the real Jennie behind them, the one she saw when they danced together two nights before, but at this moment they looked apprehensive, as if she was preparing for something. The blonde tried not to think about the reasons behind it, even though she could guess almost all of them. Jennie touched her gently, causing her to wake up at the same moment that a car horn was heard in front of them. They walked forward slowly, the driver opening his own door and going to the trunk. The bald man gestured for them to get their luggage as he turned to the front seat. Lisa placed her suitcase into the large space with little effort. She turned to find Jennie beside her, holding her own suitcase with both hands.

"Here, I'll put it in." Lisa offered with a smile.

"Jennie."

The two girls turned with the familiar voice, Lisa's heart sinking. She let her heavy luggage fall to the asphalt as the owner of the voice ran up to them with a big smile. The blonde did her best to act nonchalant, but it was as if that weight was back in her chest.

She looked at Jennie briefly as Jongin approached, the girl's eyes searching her face shyly. Lisa was surprised to find not shock in the brown eyes, but recognition. It was as if she knew the man would be there. And it shouldn't hurt the blonde so much. He had a right to be there, and Lisa shouldn't have expected anything different.

"Hi." Jennie let out as he approached, biting the corner of her lip.

"I got your message." He said, swinging the cell phone in his hand, slightly out of breath. "But I'm not sure if you got my reply.

Lisa's stomach clenched at his words. She turned to Jennie, looking for an answer, but her gaze was on Jongin, who was standing awkwardly on the sidewalk beside them. He put his cell phone in his pocket, raising an eyebrow at the girls.

"And judging by the look on your face, I don't think you got it." Jongin laughed nervously after a moment, looking at Lisa as she spoke.

"No, I got it."