But Someone Loved Me

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Chapter 11.
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[Now Playing: Feel Better by Penelope Scott]
~~~

[POV: SAPNAP]

Sapnap groaned as he lifted his head, noticing it had been laying on Punz's shoulder. He didn't really mind, cuddling could be platonic anyways and it wasn't like he was going to have any relationship until he got over Karl. Just thinking that was so weird, he grimaced, 'Get over Karl' he repeated in his mind.

He let a soft sigh escape his lips,
"You okay?" He heard Purpled whisper-yell from the other side of Punz, having decided to sit with them too.
"Hmm? Yeah." Sapnap yawned as he rubbed his eyes, looking over at Punz to see he was still fast asleep and Purpled propped up against the corner of the couch.

When Purpled tried to fall asleep on Punz's shoulder they had ended up having to lean down, considering that they were both equal in height which made it awkward to try to do. And by the eyebags under Purpled's eyes it definitely wasn't comfortable either.

"Did you get any sleep?" He asked, to which Purpled responded with a huffy laugh,
"Not a wink, I had one of those things where your half awake or half asleep and you can dream and shit for like hours and not be able to move. But your still aware of your surroundings and would be able to wake up if you wanted- y'know?" Purpled said, frowning as they realized they'd started rambling about his sleep.

"Yeah, hasn't happened to me in a while though fortunately." Sapnap shrugged, Purpled nodding before looking back down at his phone.
"Still have no idea what it actually is, I can't google 'half awake half asleep dream disorder' and expect an actual answer." Purpled snorted, their tone of voice sounding slightly bitter.

Editing Otter here, I have discovered this may (may im not 100% certain) be REM or hypnagogic/hypnopompic hallucinations which is funny because I think I probably have them too, so trauma/disorder dumping on the characters continues ig??

"I'm so sorry dude, that sounds really horrible.." Sapnap's voice drifted off, "Maybe google it still though? You never know." Sapnap said, nodding at the phone in Purpled's hand.

"Yeah, imma head to my own bed and see if I can actually sleep without that happening for once though." Purpled stretched before leaving to head to his room, without waiting for a reply from Sapnap, who shrugged and leaned his head back onto Punz's shoulder. Punz shifting slightly in his sleep before going still again, Sapnap adjusting to it as well.

His eyes squeezing shut as he remembered one moment he and Karl had together before he confessed, both young lovesick idiots who were too blind to realize their feelings for one another.

~~~

Karl laughed as Sapnap wrapped his arms around his torso and swung him into the couch.
"Now you have to play Mario-Kart with me!" Sapnap grinned evilly as he held Karl in place.

"Fineee, but you get the snacks?" Karl said as he stood up to get the controllers, Sapnap nodding in agreement and walking to the kitchen to get snacks, shuffling around in the cupboards before finding a bag of Chez-Mix, one of his and Karl's favorites.

Heading to the fridge and grabbing out two monsters for them, returning to the living room to see Karl already my waiting for him on the couch.

"Catch," Sapnap yelled as he threw the bag, Karl fumbling slightly before catching it, a snort of laughter coming from Sapnap as he sidled up to Karl on the couch. Handing him his controller, Karl leaning into Sapnap's chest with a soft sigh of content. Occasionally sipping from their drinks or eating handfuls of Chex Mix, or exchanging banter as they played the game.

Sapnap was on cloud nine, it was only him and Karl in the entire world at that time, to his brain at least, just the two of them... together forever.

They were the moon and the sun, made for one another, but never truly together. Perhaps their solar eclipse was that year they were together.. Beautiful like fireworks but they didn't last long, only the smoke remains, longing for the beauty it once was.

Heh, he remembered around time where he and Karl went mid-night skating, it was pitch black out with only the street lamps to light their way. It always seemed the times where they were together with nobody else in sight was Sapnap's favorite, maybe he just wanted to be selfish and keep Karl all to himself... and he did, for a while at least.

Only the occasion car passing by to disturb their peace, which they didn't really mind, too busy enjoying each other's presence. When they finally went home, Sapnap had snuck into Karl's room so they could cuddle together, them already having started dating that night, only weeks after the night they played video games while they cuddled.
There was no words tot describe it, except perfect....

"Who are you?" An voice echoed around, Sapnap whipping around to see Karl, his brown fluffy hair, brown eyes that had always been so sweet and welcoming, but now was cold and confused.

"Karl? What?" Sapnap stuttered, his voice high and painful.
"It's me? Sapnap- don't you remember?" Sapnap asked, tears beginning to well up in his eyes, taking a step forward Karl and reaching towards him before Karl pulled away.

Sapnap frowning, hesitating before dropping his outstretched arm to his side.
"I'm sorry, I don't remember you... Were you one of my friends?" Karl asked his gaze tinted with confusion.

Sapnap inhaled shakily, yeah, friends, he thought bitterly.
"Y-yeah, we were really close..."

Karl tilted his head,
"Well, you must've not been that important to me then if I forgot you huh?" His voice was uncharacteristically cold, gaze even becoming darker.

"Wha-?" Sapnap stuttered, fear and sadness washing over him in ferocious waves, not even waves, more like a tsunami of emotions.

"I guess we weren't very close, perhaps I was just using you or I didn't truly care, because it would make sense for me to otherwise remember you." Karl snapped an explanation, beginning to maniacally laugh as Sapnap backed away in short steps, trying to calm his breathing.

"I- No! You loved me!" Sapnap squeezed his eyes shut as he tried to stop the tears rolling down his cheeks.
"Hah! Oh to be young and in a one-sided love." Karl snorted, his tone scarily monotone.

"You- you did! Someone fucking loved me?... right?" Sapnap whispered, mostly to himself. The room around him becoming nothing but a black blur, Sapnap falling to the ground and curling up in on himself.

"You fucking dumbass. To think someone would actually love you? You really must be stupid to believe I would ever care about you." Karl's voice echoed around the black room, Sapnap's body convulsing in sobs as Karl repeated it over and over again.

"I don't care about you."

"I never did."

~~~

"Sapnap-?! You okay? Wake up please..."


(1205 words)

Whose is that? TUNE IN TOMORROW TO FIND OUT!

HYDRATE AND HAPPY HOLIDAYS YOU LITTLE SHITS /lh
Also sorry this seemed like a short chapter q-q

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