Love At First Flight (Hernandez #1)

16

TW: Overthinking/Sensitive Words

Mainit na simoy ng hangin ang bumalot sa'kin pagkababa ko ng eroplano. Hindi parin nagbabago ang Pilipinas, mainit parin ang simoy ng hangin.

I suddenly lose my smile when I remembered all those pains we've felt. Lianna will have her first chemotherapy here in the Philippines.

She has Leukemia...stage 1.

Bakit sobrang bigat naman ng parusa ang ibinigay niya? Hindi ako nagkulang sa kapatid ko, hindi ako nag alanganin na ibigay lahat ng gusto niya...nang ikakasaya niya.

Why suddenly she need to suffer in this kind of pain? Does she deserve this?

This life of us is frustrating.

Every happiness of us...has consequences.

"Love... Let's go home." Napatingin ako kay Paulo na hinawakan ang kamay ko. I smiled, looking away.

Minahal mo ako sa panahong durog na durog ako, mamahalin mo parin kaya ako kapag biglang nagbago ang desisyon ko?

Why love has so many reasons? Why...life is full of consequences?

Wala na kaming magagawa, if genie do exist, I'll wish my sister's fast recovery and long...life. Wala na akong hihilingin pa, kung hindi ang pagiging maayos ng mga kapatid ko.

Kung alam ko lang na...every happiness have consequences, sana hindi nalang akong naging masaya. Sana hinayaan ko nalang ang sarili kong maging malungkot at miserable. If this is the consequences I got from being happy, please. Take all my happiness away.

Ayokong nararanasan ng kapatid ko ang hirap, mas gusto kong ako nalang, ako nalang ang nagdudusa.

"Do you want some fresh air?" Paulo asked, holding my hand.

He tighten his grip while driving. Love, why life is so cruel?

"Can I? Love? I don't want her to suffer...." Namumuo nanaman ang mga luha sa mata ko.

He sighed, while my tears are slowly falling.

"Ano ang gagawin ko? Ano ang dapat kong gawin? Why...why I can't breathe? Why...why can't we have the happiness we deserve?" Tanong ko sa sarili habang pinupunasan ang luhang umaagos sa aking pisngi.

Hinigpitan niya ang hawak sa aking kamay.

"Love..love... You won't do anything, your sister will make it. Don't fucking think negative thoughts! Ano kaba, Lavigne? You're worsening the situation. Please, baby. Calm down, okay? Breathe in... breathe out." Sinunod ko ang gusto niya, kumalma ako.

Kalma, Lavigne. Paulo is right, mas lalo nating pinapalala ang sitwasyon. She'll be fine.