'COURT??'
I moved around Marcus and went and sat down next to Carmen, her black silky hair gently brushing my cheek as she kissed my forehead. I turned to look at Marcus, his wife Mya and my mum, all of their faces blank.
'Why would you even mention that word man?' said Marcus rubbing his temples,
'So what, I should just let her up and leave?' I said throwing my hands up in the air, 'nah that's not happening'
'But you didn't have to take it that far Reece' contributed Mya shaking her head a little,
'She shouldn't have kept them away from me'
'It sounds like she's been through a lot' my mum commented, as she examined her nails, letting out a huge sigh before looking at me, her eyebrows furrowed.
'So have I'. The room went quiet, nobody knowing what to say.
'Baby' Carmens voice chimed in as she gently squeezed my arm, 'your mum's right, she has been through a lot, and I know you have to, but you've had Marcus, your mum, your friends and me to help you'
'She had Kadeem'
'But from what you've told us it's clear he didn't have her best interest' she replied giving me a soft smile, 'there's a difference between having someone physically there for you and having someone who is mentally and emotionally there for you'
'I don't care' I replied, brushing all their concerns away. Marcus rolled his eyes whilst Mya looked at me with a pitying look.
'Can you guys leave us'? Marcus, Mya and Carmen all nodded their heads and left the room, Carmen brushing her hand over my forearm before leaving just me and my mum in the room alone. I sat there watching her as she stood up, straightening out her work trousers, making her way to the fridge and taking out two cartons of orange juice before walking back towards me and placing one of them down in front of me.
'Mum'
'Sh' she said, sitting down opposite me at the dining table. I shut my mouth and watched her as she pierced open the carton and took a sip. Feeling awkward I copied and drank my own juice as we both sat in silence.
'Fix it Reece' she said after a further 5 minutes of silence went past, 'fix it and fix it soon'
'Why are none of you seeing it from my point of view?' I asked exasperated,
'It's not about your point or her point, it's about doing the right thing. Court is not the right thing' she replied staring at me. I relaxed my shoulders and slumped back into the dining chair, running my hand down my face. I felt all the energy to argue leave my body making me feel tired.
'I don't want her to take them back. I don't even know them' I eventually admitted looking at my hands before looking up to see my mum watching me. She reached over and placed her hand over mine and gave it a small squeeze before getting up.
'Maybe you should get to know them before you start screaming court. I can't tell you what to do Reece, you're grown, but don't make mistakes that you wont be able to change'. Walking out the kitchen my mum left me to my own thoughts. It had been a couple days since I saw Bianca and I had put off telling everyone what happened because I knew this would be their reaction. It pissed me off that they were more understanding towards Bianca than I was - I couldn't see past the fact that I had two children who were almost 6 that I knew nothing about; and there now here. I wanted kids but I never wanted them young, I never wanted to be that guy that carelessly got a girl pregnant; I wanted stability, loyalty and love, a solid foundation with me and my woman before I bought in children. I had been thinking about children ever since I moved in with Carmen a couple months ago. We'd been together for a while, one of my work buddies introduced me to her at his going away party a couple years back, and we clicked instantly. I didn't think I'd fall this hard for Carmen - I never imagined I'd love any girl the way I love her, but it happened and I didn't regret it. There were times I thought about Bianca, but then they were often wiped or turned into something negative; I had built up so much resentment for her leaving me over the years that even now thinking about her made my skin itch. Getting up, I took two steps over to the kitchen window and leaned on it, my forehead being caressed by the cold touch of the glass as I let out huge puffs of irritation, biting down gently on my bottom lip. It took a while but I knew I had to sort something out. I didn't care for what Bianca had to say about anything at the moment, but I knew I wanted to create some sort of bond with my children. I refused to become the man that my dad was to me and Marcus. Turning around I leaned on the window, my back pressed against the glass as I took my phone out of my pocket, scrolling to the unsaved number that Jade had given me after her wedding rehearsal. Staring at it for a while I decided to send a text telling her I'd be around sometime next week to talk, deciding it would be best if I didn't speak to her. It didn't take long till she replied with a simple 'K', making me lock my phone out of irritation before stuffing it back into my pocket. Twenty five or not, the 'K' response still pissed me off, and something told me she remembered this.
