The Alpha's Witch

Chapter Ten: I'm sorry

Chapter ten: ~Lina

I waited for Killian to speak. To bring up his past but he seemed lost in his own mind set. In a way I felt sorry for him, he seemed so scarred by it, but I needed to know. I couldn't pretend like it didn't bother me. The way he's treat me. I needed to know this. Everyone needs to speak their past at some point. I needed to know his now.

"Well then...I guess I should start at the beginning." Killian mutters his eyes hazy from thinking about his past no doubt," He doesn't turn to look at me. Not once. He stares off at the wall.

"I never knew my father, he apparently died before I was born. I didn't care, He was never there, so nothing about him really mattered. I didn't miss him. My mum then moved on, found a second chance mate if you will and they married. I was treated well, my step father never treated me any different than he would his own son.

"I was happy I guess, I never went without. My mother ruled like a Luna should, she was brilliant. My step father a good Alpha. I was taught all the traits of being an Alpha, raised by him and trained. I wanted to call him dad, he was the type of person anyone could hope for in a fatherly figure. I couldn't call him dad though. He wasn't my real dad after all.

"When I was seven my mother fell pregnant, I had a younger sibling. They meant everything to me, my family. When I was ten we were asked to help in the purging of the witches. My step father went to help a neighbouring pack. He left and when he returned he was wounded. Alive but wounded...None of us detected the witch that had followed him.

"She attacked...many of the pack members died. Then I was thrown into a room with my parents and younger sibling. I was held down and watched as this...witch tore my family apart limb from limb leaving me the only one alive. They killed them painfully. Then left me...but not before marking my skin with the mark of their clan. There was so much blood.

"So much damn blood. I wanted to die...curl up and join my family...but the witches did something. I can't die...I just can't. I tried...I tried so many fucking times to die. Each time I did their brand would burn and I would be as healthy as ever. They wanted me alive but for what I didn't know. I've tried hunting down their clan but I could never find it. My aunt was the only family survivor. I was raised by her for the rest of my life.

"Instead I have went about purging the witches...ridding them of the pain they have caused our race. We need to win this war, I need to avenge my parents....The witches need to pay for what they have done. To me...to everyone. I cannot let it go unpunished. I can't. I want this curse lifted to."

His eyes hold so much pain and I feel a tear slip down my cheek. He had been through so much...seen some horrific deaths...I didn't know anything really about any of this. The thought of him wanting to kill himself as well....it killed me to think of how much he was hurting. He got up and began pacing, his eyes darknening. His wolf was close to the surface and I had to tread lightly.

"I'm sorry." I say quietly knowing he can hear me full well.

"Don't." He all but growls before walking to the door. I quickly run after him grabbing his arm.

"Killian..." I begin.

"Don't fucking touch me witch. Right now, I cannot be near you, All I can smell is your witch genes and it is driving my wolf insane. I need to be alone...away from you." He growls and storms out leaving me alone once again. I feel tears prick my eyes as I watch him dissappear from sight. It seems that whenever we make real progress and take a step forward we take two backwards again. I fall to my knees and curl up.

I'm being rejected because of my genes once again. I'm always being blamed for things I have no control over. Life was cruel and unfair. Even to Killian...I think about how he wanted to die and kinda feel like that myself. I want to get away from everything...dissappear into a world of my own. I sit up suddenly and rush out the room and into the room I know as the office.

Killian wasn't here suprise suprise...I roll my eyes and dry them before looking through the drawers and book cases.

"Looking for something?"

"Tate can I ask you something?" I say not even bothering to look at him as I continue my search,

"Shoot."

"Do you have any books on witch magic?"

"............"

"Please Tate...it's important. If I'm going to help the wolves fight in the war I need to learn ho to properly harness my powers."

"...We have a few....there are not a lot....but a few. Part of our rare collections." He replies and I finally stop to look at him.

"Take me to them." He sighs and nods his head.

"Yes Luna."

Tate leads me down some corridoors I don't remeber ever going down and into the underground dungeons? They remind me if dungeons but they may be something else.

"Where are we?" I ask breaking the uncomfortable silence that has fallen over us.

"The underground caves." Tate says..."We don't have much further to go."

"Okay." I say before picking up the courage to ask. "Do you know where Killian is?"

"....He um....he's out....I'm sorry Melina but he doesn't want to see you any time soon." Tate says.

"I figured as much." I mutter but I don't let it bother me too much. I have a plan right now and I am determined to see it through. Tate leads us into a storage room that holds precisely five books. All of which look ancient. Their leather bound pages faded and worn. I go over and look at them, reading their titles and give a quick read of their content before I pick two of them and walk back to Tate.

"I'm taking these with me." I say and leave without looking back. I don't stay in Killians room that night. I sit in a spare room with a selection of clothes and sit reading through the books. I know what I'm looking for and I know what I want to do...Putting it into practice is where things will get tricky though.

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The next morning I feel groggy, sleep hadn't been easy and I felt tired. I had stayed up late reading and researching for my plan. As I make my way into the kitchen I see Killian standing there talking to Graham and Tate. He freezes when I walk into the room and turns. He seems distant as he looks at me and I just look away and sit at the table and begin talking with a pack member. As I do so I notice Killian storm out and sigh.

After breakfast I corner Tate.

"I need your help." I say.

"Um....oookkkaaayyy.....it depends."

"What if I said it could help us possibly win this war?" I ask and he looks at me with wide eyes full of confusion and worry. "You can't tell Killian though...please." I will literally beg him if I have to in order to keep what I want to do a secret.

"Will I get hurt?" He asks and I chuckle.

"Maybe...but if we get some evil prisoners for me to test on...then I think we will be okay."

"This sounds dangerous." He mutters.

"It can be...which is why I want to practice on the rogues you captured the other day. My guess is the witches have hired them, so whilst I ..er...experiment we can maybe get information at the same time."

"I don't know Melina, this is sounding very risky."

"I know but Tate this will be worth it if I can get the end result sorted. I promise Tate. I wouldn't do anything to endanger this pack....I want to prove myself to everyone."

"You know you don't need to." He mutters.

"I want to Tate. It's part of my job to look after this pack as their Luna...I will do this." He smirks before bowing his head in respect.

"Well then Luna." He says "I will gladly help you."