When The Gold Is Gone ✔ ~ trixya

Chapter 14: After Enduring The Tangled Time

"You are not Alexej at all... you're Katya."

Katya stood there paralyzed under Trixie's questioning gaze. She had waited for this moment her entire life, known that one day the truth would be out. But dread also filled her as she realized that her foolish actions may have just lead to the end of her engagement, the end of the union of their Kingdoms. For so many years that was what she had wanted, and yet it had also been what she had feared most of all.

"Answer me." Trixie said, but her voice was no longer harsh, instead there was a hopeful look in her eyes.

"Yes... I am... I'm Katya." She finally admitted. 

"I thought... I thought you were dead... Why? Why did you let me believe that? How could you let me think you were dead for all these years?" 

"My father and mother... they made me become my brother... Alexej and I, we were playing that day... and he... It was my fault. He was scared, and yet I pushed for him to jump... It was all my fault." Katya said, soft tears falling down her cheeks.

"Oh Katya... No, it was not. You were just children. It was not your fault, Katya." Trixie assured her. "Can I see you? Please, can I see the real you?"

Katya nodded, and with shaking hands she took her handkerchief from her pocket and wet it with water from the leather canteen strapped to her horse. She gently started to wipe the layers of makeup off, slowly revealing her true features. Katya winced as she started to remove her false beard, wiping under where it had sat to remove all residue of the adhesive that had held it so close to her skin.

Her heart nearly stopped when a soft hand came up to caress her cheek, tracing the lines of her face with warmth and care. Katya looked up, her blue eyes meeting Trixie's honey-brown irises. There was no hatred in her eyes, only worry and something that the Resvyan girl could only describe as an emotion similar to love.

"Hello Katya... I have missed you deeply... You are so beautiful, it should never have been hidden from the world." Trixie whispered kindly.

"I never meant to fool you, Trixie. At first I was too young to think about the consequences of taking Alexej's place, and I felt so guilty for his death that I was ready to agree to anything. But over the years it made me bitter, and then I started blaming you for it too. It was foolish but you seemed like the very symbol of why I was forced to keep up the act. Then I started realizing that you would find out on our wedding night either way, and so I tried to convince mother and father to cancel the engagement. But they wouldn't listen, and so I started rebelling further. I never meant to hurt you, not really, but somehow you became a target of it anyways." 

"Then... what changed? Why did you start flirting with me?" 

"Well, I know it is against your laws and it may cause you to hate me.... but I fell in love with you. I tried to deny it, tried to convince myself that it was not so, but I couldn't. I craved you once you left, dreamed of how you would have grown, how your features might have changed. I went to that brothel when I was of age to be seen as a man by society, but I ended up using it as a way to try to forget about you. It never worked though, instead it was you I saw beneath me every time. And then you returned, more beautiful than I could have ever imagined, and I lost to my heart entirely. I kept reminding myself that it would be better to keep you at a distance, but I could not stay away. I am sorry... I'm sure you find me disgusting..." Katya said, brazing herself for the other girl to shame her for loving a woman.

"Why would I ever find you disgusting? Or hate you?" Trixie questioned.

"It is forbidden by the laws of your country-"

"Yes, and I did not write those laws, nor do I agree with them. I do have one question though, you mentioned falling in love with me. Did you truly mean it?"

"I did, but I know we can not be together. I could not give you the life you deserve, I could never grant you children. Not that you would ever want me of course." Katya said, voicing out all her deepest worries, all the thoughts that had haunted her for years.

"And whoever told you that? I do not care about children, I never truly wanted any to begin with. You know, I thought there was something feminine about you when I saw you again after all those years, and truthfully, I dreamed that the man I was seeing was you. To me, the you who is in front of me now is the most attractive person I have ever seen. And at the end of the day, the person I fell for was still you. It was your wit, your charm, your eyes, and your lips that bewitched me." Trixie said lovingly.

Katya could hardly even believe it. Here the woman she loved was telling her that she loved her back, not as the man she had tried so hard to be, but as the woman she truly was.
How could fate be so kind?

"I do not deserve you, I have been so cruel. All I have done is cause you pain." Katya whispered.

"You have been in pain all these years, surely you have paid for any cruel actions in tenfold. We can handle any difficulties, we can work through all the pain as long as we're together, just as we always should have been. So please, just let me love you, and love me just the same." 

There was a pause. A completely silence, the waves beneath the cliffs even seeming muted as Trixie awaited Katya's answer. And then suddenly the Resvyan leaned in and captured the other's lips in a passionate kiss. They pulled each other closer, hands grasping both clothing and hair as if they needed to be as close as humanly possible in order to feel complete. Katya's heart was beating faster than ever and she soon ran out of breath, pulling back to finally grant Trixie a full answer.

"I would love nothing more."