Camilo Angst Oneshots

The notes

Tw: mentions is su1c1d3, panic/anxiety attack (still don't understand which ones which), and mentions of sh

Takes place after the movie

Camilo pov
I sit down on my bed. We just finished another dinner and I finished all of my chores. I can barely breathe. Abuela just yelled at me! Why would she do that?? Well, I know why. She told me I was as useless as my gift.. Am I that useless?

My brain keeps thinking about ending it all. Maybe then she'll care? Maybe if I end it, all this pain will go away. Tears start rolling down my cheeks as I grasp my chest. I can barely breathe.

"B-breathe in..breathe-" I can barely finish the word before coughing and sobing again. I just continue crying. Maybe if I just write the notes? Some notes, thats all.

I grab my papers and a pencil. I look at it before deciding to do Tía Julieta and my cousins first

Dear Tía Julieta,
Im sorry for doing this to you! You are the best aunt anyone could ever ask for. I just can't deal with this pain any longer... Don't blame yourself for this. This isn't your fault! Abuela was just too much..I love you.. Goodbye

-Camilo Madrigal

I look at the paper proudly before moving onto the next one.

Dear Isabella,
Hey Isa, you have been an amazing cousin, don't you forget that. You were the person I came out to. With my sexuality and gender. You were so excepting, and I will never forget that. To bad others can't be as nice as you.. Never forget that I love you. This will never be your fault. Goodbye prima..

-Camilo Madrigal

I move on again.

Dear Luisa,
You are so strong, I've always looked up to you as an older sister. Of course Delores will be number one in that category, but you are still amazing. I love you so much. I just can't deal with this anymore. I can't uandle being under this pressure of work like you can. Stay strong, this isn't your fault. Ask for help if it's needed prima, goodbye

-Camilo Madrigal

Looking at the paper with a sad smile, I move onto my twin. My cousin. My primita.

Dear Mirabel,
Hi Mira.. Remember when we were little kids? When we would both try and sneak snacks from the kitchen. We called ourselves, "The Madrigal Twins," too bad those times had to end.. This isn't your fault.. I always have been jealous of you for having no gift.. You don't have to deal with any identity issues and worrying about what you look like. I love you though, I always have primita. Goodbye

-Camilo Madrigal

I look at the paper, skiming it iver for any misspelling. Before moving onto my Tíos and dad

Dear tío Agustin,
I know we aren't that close, even if we live in the same house, but you always have been awesome. You are amazing. This isn't your fault. I love you tío. Goodbye..

-Camilo

While writing that note I start feeling like actually doing it. No one would really care, right?

Dear tío Bruno,
I grew up most of my life without you. Im sorry for painting such a bad picture of you into Mirabels mind. I remember being such amazing friends with you when I was younger. When you left I was heart broken. I thought everyone would leave me! I waited fir you to come back for years. I eventually started forgetting features of your face, and hair, and hieght. I went to my mamà and village for help. They all told me what I told Mirabel. "Rats, he loved rats. It was disgusting and scary." "He disappeared randomly! We don't talk about him. Never!" "He see's your dreams! Thats how he knew exactly what to sat to scar us!!" Im so sorry for believing it all. You have always been the best tío (along with tío Agustin too though). This isn't yoyr fault! Don't let others make you think that it is!! I love you tío. (take notice in tío, they are not getting shipped. That is disgusting. If your looking for that disgusting stuff look somewhere else bc that is illegal and incest.) Goodbye..

-Camilo Madrigal

I grab the next paper, thinking about my papa.

Dear papa,
Im so sorry for doing this to you papa. You are the best dad anyone could ask for! You have been there for me, Delores, Antonio, and mom through all of our worsts. I could never put my thankfulness into words that fit how thankful I am. Just know that this isn't your fault. I love you papa. Keep mom from freaking out, please. Goodbye..

-Camilo Madrigal

I look over it again. Now knowing that I should do it. Now grabbing the next paper, I think over when I will do it.

Dear mamà,
You are the best mamí anyone could gave asked for. You always tried to keep me happy, and I did the same for you in return. Im sorry that im not helping you right now. I wish I were there to help you now.. You are so awesome. Don't ever forget that. This is not your fault. I love you, goodbye

-Camilo Madrigal

I know that I need to do it tomorrow night. I'm going to give them a 24 hour chance.

Dear Delores,
I bet your going to be the one to find me. Your most likely going to hear it and walk in, only to find me. Im sorry if thats what happened. Im sorry that you have to hear and see that. I wish I would be there to comfort you, but im not. I hope you understand that this is not your fault. I love you hermana.. Goodbye.

-Camilo Madrigal

I smile sadly once again and grab my next paper.

Dear Antonio,
Hey Hermanito. You probably are to young to understand whats going on. You are the best little brother ever. I will be away for a ling time, okay? Im sorry that im disappearing like tío Bruno did with me. I will always be there with you no matter what. Even when not there physically, I will be there mentally. I love you Tonio.. Goodbye

-Camilo Madrigal

Now its time for the fateful last family member. I take a deep breath and hold it for a second before letting it go. Grasping the pencil and paper, I write mythoughts to Abuela. After many tries, I get the perfect note for her

Dear Abuela,
You and I haven't been close, especially recently. You have been pretty annoyed and I overheard what you said. I get it, I am pretty useless. You won't have to deal with me anymore though.. Goodbye Abuela.

-Camilo Madrigal

I look over all of the notes again before put down the pencil and going to my bed to sleep. I am pretty tired from all the crying. Maybe tomorrow they will change. Even though its unlikely..

I let the darkness of sleep consume me

......................................................
Longest one I've made so far-
Thank you all for all of the support ✨✨
Shoutouts!
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And special thanks too
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~Bye~

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