Bittersweet Love | Cedric Diggory

Chapter Ten: Infuriating

This bet I had agreed to do changed everything for me.

Malfoy is a completely different person compared to what I thought of her at first impressions. If someone were to tell me this time last year about the situation I am currently in I would've laughed in their face most likely.

Although I still love annoying her quite often, however my snide remarks and funny retorts are the only things I can manage to say without acting like an idiot because of the way she makes me feel whenever I am around her.

Earlier this morning, me and Malfoy got our now marked essays back from Snape in which we were incredibly pleased when we saw we had received an Outstanding on it. I must admit, most of the credit should go to Malfoy as she is the one who made most of the effort with it.

After potions, I attempted to walk Malfoy to her next lesson, which resulted in her becoming incredibly irritated by me which was quite amusing on my side.

"Has anyone ever told you that you are the most irritating person on Earth?" Malfoy asked, attempting to quicken her pace and outwalk me.

I, however, caught up with her easily. A hint of a smirk forming as I replied: "Has anyone ever told you that you are the most beautiful person on Earth?"

"You have. In fact, you declare it every single day without fail."

"I am consistent," I shrugged.

"You're infuriating." She retorted.

"Would an infuriating person walk you to class?"

I watched as she couldn't help but smile at my remark, though it quickly disappeared when I spoke again; "Be careful, you almost look happy in my company."

"I despise you."

"You love me," I grinned. Her cheeks turned the slightest shade of pink as she didn't say anything to my response. 

The bitter breeze ruffled my hair as Malfoy and I sat, shoulder to shoulder at the astronomy tower. The stars were blinking, and the pale moon was shimmering in the clear sky. Small bits of snow still cascaded down, leaving excess flakes on the edge of the tower.

"What's your biggest fear? Besides from your father." I asked randomly; desperate to know more about her.

She shrugged, staring ahead of her. "Don't have any."

I rolled my eyes, "Everyone is afraid of something."

"Well not having my father as an option doesn't give me anything to choose from," Malfoy chuckled.

"I won't judge you."

Slowly, she turned her head and looked at me. "I'm afraid of love, it sounds pathetic but I am."

A crease formed between my eyebrows as I wondered why she was afraid of something such as love. "Why are you afraid of it?" I spoke after a few moments of silence.

"There's lots of reasons," she says. "I mean obviously there's heartbreak involved. Love and heartbreak kind of go hand in hand. There's also the fact that I don't want to depend on anyone, because the only person you can really rely on is yourself."

"That still doesn't explain it," I said whilst sighing.

"Well," she says, "Maybe I'm afraid to love people because I don't believe anyone could ever really love me."

'I do' I so desperately wanted to say but the words couldn't come out of my mouth. 

I couldn't help but become distracted as she entered the great hall.

It was irritating really, her contagious smile and light laughter consuming my heart and mind completely. But what made it worse is that I wanted to hear her laugh, hoping to witness the upturn of her mouth.

And though I'd like to believe that my soul isn't entirely lost within you, I know that it is.

I cannot even spend minutes without your presence for I fear that I am too lonely without it. I yearn for the conversations that sit idly in the thickness of silence when we are both too fearful to speak first.

I bite my tongue often because the truth is what will set us free and that is what I am most afraid of. Even if I must watch you love another being that is not me due to my untimely love for you, I will do just that as long as I live.

I would rather be trapped entirely with you than free without. 

_

A/N: sorry it's a short chapter but I am exhausted from today, I promise the next chapter will be longer. <3