Shattered

Dead

I dont even take my car back home, the keys are still in my pockets. I sit on the park bench.

My mind is swirling like the clouds of a thunderstorm . Everything happened so fast, all at once.

I have so many questions. Like how could they do this, when did it start happening? Why didnt they sit me down and talk to me instead of humiliating me infront of important people.

But one question that's stomping like an elephant in my brain is what now?

I walk back to the greenhouse. Majority of the cars that were parked outside are now gone. A few people are sitting around chatting while eating some dinner.

I open the car and sit inside. A wave of nostalgia hits me. This car, it has too many memories. I cant do it. It smells like her.

As in about to start the car, there's a knock on the window. I turn my head toward the sound.

I see eyes I never wanted to see at this point. Blue orbs shine through the dimmed window. My heart freezes.

I roll the window down.

"Hey Champ." She says, her eyes are bloodshot. The small smile on her face shows that she is trying to lighten the moment.

When I dont reply,  she opens her mouth to speak then she closes it.

I cant hate Charlotte, she didnt do anything. She didnt persuade Elizabeth to cheat on me.

"Mom and I need a ride. She left with him." I can tell that she is trying to use euphemism. In order to not hurt me.

I nod, afraid to hear my own voice . She leaves and calls her mother. I wait patiently.  Afraid to see her mother because of the resemblance they both have.

The door at the back of my car opens and their scents fill my car.

I start the car, the only thing on my mind is getting home.  I need to sleep or have a strong drink. Both would do me good.

Mrs Hart gets on a call. All I can hear is her voice right now.

"Where the hell are you?" She asks.

This is the first time I hear her being crude.

"Get the hell back here and fix your goddamned mistake." She whisper yells.

"Elizabeth Felicia Hart. I swear on your father's grave..." she starts.

"Dont you hang up on me... she hung up on me." She marvels.

I restrain from comforting her, this time I choose me. I put myself first and I need to feel this pain.

We walk up to the apartment. I open up for them and both of them walk straight to the couch and plop silently.

I walk up stairs. Everything is just so overwhelming.  I rush into the cleaner closet and fetch a plastic bag. I throw all the pictures she and I have together.

Including one where it was myself, her, Usher and his ex girlfriend Mandy. That annoys me the most because they had been sitting next to each other.

Then into the closer I charge and I pack all the clothes she has. I throw them in the plastic bags and I rush downstairs with the five bags in hand. I throw them and they fall just near the couch. The one with photos shatteres. I hear the glass breaking, but I could barely care.

The two ladies downstairs stare up at me, shock on Mrs Hart's face and fear on Charlotte's.  I dont say anything, I pack away everything that's hers and I throw it down stairs.

Soon there is a knock on the door, the person enters. Just as I throw the last plastic  which is filled with all her favourite lamps. It shatteres when it touches the ground.

Usher and Elizabeth stand there shocked.

"Good." I say in the calmest voice. I nearly fly down the stairs.

The two have guilt written all over their faces.

"Take all your stuff." I instruct. She bends down to pick up the bags.

"Take the stuff you bought with your money." I glare at her.

"Come on man, you're bigger than that." Usher now speaks. And it's as if my last nerve and self control snap simultaneously. 

"Where you the bigger man? Huh! Where you a man at all? How could you do that to me Ush?" I ask him. All the while yelling the women around me are all quiet.

Mrs Hart and Charlotte are in tears. Elizabeth is pale.

"Get your shit and leave my house. I dont ever want to see niether of your disgusting faces ever again. Do you understand?" Iask. They stare at me wide eyed.

As if they had expected me to sit down and speak to them. My eyes darken, I can feel the anger boiling inside me. Threatening to spill on this woman and man.

" I said do you understand me!?" I yell. They carry the bags and leave.

Charlotte and Mrs Hart are holding each other in each others arms and weeping.

And just like that, they're gone. I sit on the barstool. Charlotte and Mrs Hart are staring blankly at the television.  And in an abrupt movement Charlotte stands.

Her eyes are swollen. She sits right next to me and grabs the glass of whiskey that had been infront of me. She gulps it and looks at me.

"I understand that my sister has hurt you. I really do. And I wouldnt be mad at all if you decided to abandon my mother and I. I just... I was really hoping that I could finish high school  and study law. I just... I never..." she cried.

I pulled her into my hands and caressed her head. Unlike Elizabeth,  her hair smells like coconut.  She weeps.

Her mother joins the hug, they both cry in my arms.

"Please have mercy on us." She begs.

"Its not your mistake, its Elizabeth's and just as she had made the mistake on her own. She will suffer the consequences on her own." I say to them.

It takes them moments for them to relax. They both look at me with great appreciation.

"This isn't how I raised her." Mrs Hart says to herself. But its audable enough for me to hear.

Soon I have to take the two back to their apartment. Going back to my bed, it feels lonely.

I ask myself how I survived all along without her, before I met her that is.

The house feels so cold, not to talk of the bed. I'm sleepless, and usually when I am, she would talk to me.

About random things like her day. Or her childhood. She'd let me in her small world and I'd enjoy every minute of it. And we'd both fall asleep with smiles on our faces.

And now? That's gone. I dont have that anymore.