I told my friend about what you did to me. she didn't know, i didn't tell anyone until so many months later. i didn't tell anyone about how numb you made me feel. she knew you from high school, and she had no idea that you did that to me. you made me feel so cold and so alone. it was like you did what you did and my body hurt, and my tears wouldn't stop. i cried into my pillow while you did that to me. i cried in the bathroom after you were done. and i stayed in there for awhile. i didn't say anything to you. then i came to bed and cried even more. when i woke up you had texted me and apologized, and i cried again. it's a trauma response to forget—but i can't forget this. i cant forget the sick feeling in my stomach and chest. i cant forget crying in bed for weeks, crying every time i was alone, crying in the car on the way to work because it was the only spot that felt safe. i was so alone. i told no one. i didn't talk to my mom for days. or anyone. all i could think is "why would he do that"
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Things I'm Thinking About
PuisiThis started as a note in my phone but I wanted to share it for others to read as well. These are the thoughts that I have gone through after getting out of an unhealthy relationship, rejoining the dating scene, and rediscovering myself. It's so cle...
