Oneshots 👹

Dee Dee's bi flag (🍁)

Dee Dee Allen was walking downtown on a normal day. It was cloudy outside and raining but she was still out there bc she was a #girlboss. She stopped short when she spotted Nigel Bottom running through the rain, his umbrella almost carrying him away with the wind.

"WHAT ATE YOU DOING," screamed Dee Dee. "This is my walk. Why are you on it?!?"

Nigel didn't answer her infuriated question. He was too busy slipping through the puddles as the wind got stronger. Dee Dee marched over and pulled him down by his leg.

"I'm sorry Dee Dee 🥺," said his uwu self. "I was trying to go to the store bc Nick and Bea needed ice cream and we don't have any. Don't get mad."

"Why are you flying away? Ur not Mary Poppins. Stop doing that."

"Okay," said Nigel, but his umbrella started carrying him away again. He stared down at her helplessly as he floated higher and higher into the rainy sky.

"NIGEL NO," she yelled as he became a tiny dot. "WHAT ABOUT YOUR ICE CREAM?"

Little did she know that up in the sky Nigel was letting go of his umbrella. She stared up into the sky, watching the dot that was Nigel grow bigger and bigger, closer and closer. Nigel was screaming the whole time. Dee Dee started screaming too. Nigel flailed his arms and legs and almost flattened Dee Dee when he landed. They toppled over into a puddle.

After they got up and Dee Dee mourned the sparkly dress she had just gotten soaked, Nigel said, "can we go to Gucci?"

"No we can not go to Gucci. I have to go home and get a new dress because you wannabe Mary Poppins ruined mine!"

"Im sorry," replied Nigel. "You can get a new dress at Gucci."

"Fine," grumbled Dee Dee and they went to Gucci. She looked for a new dress and finally started to enjoy herself after Nigel disappeared. He came back trailing a pan flag behind him. She turned and looked at him. "What is that."

"It's a Gucci pan flag," said Nigel. "Bc I'm pansexual."

"Oh are you?" asked Dee Dee. "I love the LGBTQ"

"Ok. Do u want to get one?"

"Oh actually Nigel, I don't think they sell pride flags for Tony winners," she laughed. "It would kind of be straying from the point yk?"

He raised an eyebrow. "But I saw ur movie," he reminded her. "Are u not bi?"

"Haha I played a bi character on Broadway actually—"

"Oh sorry,"

"I didn't say no, Nigel," Dee Dee said, giving him a death glare. "Do they have more Gucci flags? I can get an ace one for my bf."

"Ok sure."

So they went to the pride flag section of Gucci and looked at the selection. She got a Gucci bi flag and one for Tom Hawkins. Then they left. It was still raining.

"Oh no," complained Dee Dee. "Now my new dress is going to get wet just like the old one. I hate today!"

"Don't worry," Nigel assured her. "It won't get too soaked unless you get knocked into another puddle—"

Before he could finish his scarily predictive sentence, the umbrella from earlier blew wildly around the streets in the wind and whacked Dee Dee off her feet, into the nearest puddle. Nigel screamed again.

"LOOK WHAT YOU DID, NIGEL! NOW MY NEW DRESS AND MY GUCCI BI FLAG ARE RUINED!"

"I'm sorry," sobbed Nigel. He grabbed onto the umbrella and let it carry him away. Dee Dee stormed to the bus station and rode home with the Godspell kids. When she got to the place where she lived with Tom Hawkins, she threw down the two wet pride flags and went to change into a different sparkly dress.

"Hi Dee Dee," said Tom Hawkins, coming in. "What did you get downtown?"

"I went to Gucci with Nigel and got 2 pride flags and then he ruined both of them," fumed Dee Dee. "And they were Gucci."

"Oh no," replied Tom Hawkins. "I'm sorry that happened."

"I just need to be alone." Dee Dee vanished.

She appeared at Nick and Bea's place. They were wondering where Nigel was and hungry for ice cream. They both screamed when Dee Dee faded into the room.

"Ik you guys are fans but don't get excited," she said. "I'm here bc of your brother Nigel."

"Where did you come from?!?" cried Nick.

"Nigel is a monster. He ruined my walk, he ruined my dress, he ruined my other dress, and he ruined my Gucci pride flag!"

"Did he get ice cream?" Bea asked. "We wanted ice cream."

Dee Dee didn't know the answer to her question so she ignored it. "You need to kick him out asap. He's reckless and irresponsible and he's flying around right now like Mary Poppins w his umbrella."

Nick gasped and stood up. "He's doing what??"

"Nigel can't fly!" Bea exclaimed. They both ran out into the rain and Dee Dee followed him. They all looked up and saw Nigel with his umbrella circling the house like a vulture. He let go when he spotted them and crashed through the roof. Bea and Nick screamed in terror.

"I got ice cream," called Nigel from inside.

The other two ran in to see him but Dee Dee stayed outside, still upset about her dress getting ruined outside Gucci. She vanished from the street and went back home, where Tom Hawkins was getting smth for dessert.

"Oh hi Dee Dee," said Tom Hawkins. "Do you want some ice cream?"

Dee Dee slowly turned around to look at him. "Ice cream?"

"Delicious and nutritious," replied Tom Hawkins.

Without another word, Dee Dee grabbed an umbrella from next to their door, opened the window, and jumped out, the wind carrying her far, far away, to Gucci.