Affection {a Monika x Yuri fanfiction}

Is this happening? - Chapter 14

Yuri POV

I sat down on my desk and pulled out a small sheet of paper. I grabbed a pen from my pencil case and started to write avoiding any grammar mistakes. It will take some time to get used to the club shutting down so for now I will just pretend as though I'm writing a poem for the club. Monika hasn't been doing very well lately knowing her club has completely disappeared. It was our only safe place and now It's gone. Everyone in the club understands how we all feel. Sayori has gone back to her depression phase again, Natsuki barely leaves her house and for us... well... 

That demon is still scraping scars on my hands so It's hard to save up more bandages. So in order to clear myself from all of this stress. I must perish!

Monika POV

I dragged myself out of my bed and checked the time. It's 1 AM good thing It's Friday so I don't have to think much about being late since tomorrow is Saturday. I put my casual clothes on fold my pajamas. I haven't really exited the house in a while ever since the club had been shut down. I think it would be best if I just go outside and breathe some fresh air for once. I go downstairs and put on my outdoors shoes, I put on my jacket that my mom had given me a long time ago and unlocked the front door. As I opened the door I could feel the fresh aroma of the outside world meet me once again. I step foot out of the house and close the door behind me. I sat down on the bench near the main street and pulled out my pack of cigarettes. I lit oneon fire and started smoking it. 

Even though I'm considered an adult I'm not old enough to be outside this late at night, but no one seems to be outside so as long as I don't get caught I guess I should be fine. I see that most of the lights in the houses have been completely turned off. I would've expected someone to be partying on a Friday night. That's odd...

I throw out my cigarette in the trash can and stand up from the wooden bench. I guess I should go back in. It's getting quite colder anyway. I unlock my house again and walk in taking off all my outdoors clothes. I think I should go check up on Yuri. She is my girlfriend after all. 

I walk up stairs and walk towards her room. I knock on her door three times. "Hello, Yuri. I understand that we all haven't been doing very well lately together, but I really think we should get back to our daily moods..." No answer. I knock again. Still no answer. I gently open the door trying not to make much noise. As soon as I go inside of the room my heart stops. I stay completely still trying not to mutter a single word. It was Yuri. She had stabbed herself.

I run up to her and hold her cold dead body in my hands. Tears falling from my eyes. The blood spilling from her stomach soaks in my shirt. I can see a knife on the floor as well witch was most likely used to stab herself. I let go of her body and go up to her desk. It was a sheet of paper that she usually used to write her poems and the exact same pen she used to write with during school. I read the text.

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Dear Monika, Sayori, Natsuki and MC

I know things have been tough for you, but i completely understand that. The club has been completely shut and will be from now on used as a regular classroom with any instances of club activity completely removed. I understand how you all feel.

I know that It's too soon for me to die, but it must be done. Things in my life are absolutely shattered and corrupted that everything I ever enjoyed and loved has been destroyed. I just want to go back. My suffering is never endless and I can't simply just become a new person and fix myself. Therefor I shall say goodbye to the world and be free from the pain.

-Love Yuri

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It's a suicide note. I never though that this would've happened, but here I am...

Crying all alone with the dead body of my girlfriend next to me. Yuri, why did you do it? You were the love of my life as well as the person who truly showed me the true light of the world. Why here? Why now? I pull out my cellphone as soon as possible and call for an ambulance.

next morning

I was watching as the ambulance drove off with Yuri's body. They said she won't be able to live any more so she will be in need of a funeral. I check the time. It's already 7 AM and tears are still rolling down my cheeks. I open our group chat and see that Natsuki had renamed it from "Literature club" to "Friend group". It makes sense as our club is no longer here I start texting them.

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Monika: Hello, everyone.

Natsuki: It's like 7 AM and It's even Saturday what do you need?

Monika: I know that this is a lot to take in, but Yuri has unfortunately passed away.

Natsuki: WHAT? 

Natsuki: YOU ARE JOKING RIGHT

Monika: No, she committed suicide today. 

Sayori: Really?

Monika: Yes, so I am here to invite you...

Monika: You can come if you like....

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I lay down on my bed. I have nothing to look forward to now that the love of my life has died... I don't even know how to react. I think me having a lack of emotion is a cause of trauma. I remember once talking to a therapist, she told me that certain trauma can lead to lack of emotion. I didn't think this would happen to me, but... I might come off as careless to my friends for not showing too many feelings in the funeral. I hug my pillow and let my tears soak into it. I don't feel like doing anything particular today...

The next day

Funeral day

I put on my white school school button up shirt and put a black blazer on top of it. I put on some pants as well as my socks. I go downstairs and put on my shoes as I open the door. Did I forget to lock it? Doesn't matter. All that matters is that I make it in time. I close the door behind me and lock it putting the keys in my pocket. I start heading towards the place where the funeral will take place in.

As I reach the area I open the big door. Inside I could see some people that were close to Yuri, but her parents nowhere to be found. After looking around I see Natsuki and Sayori sitting next to each other. Seeing them crying makes me tear up. I sit next to them without muttering a single word. Sayori tilts her head to see me. Her bangs were slightly out of place and her hair was a bit messy covering her face. "Oh... It's you... You're just in time..." Sayori wipes her tears with her sleeves and looks forward. "Seems like it really is true... Yuri really did die..." Natsuki quietly mutters however her voice still echo's. I can hear the sounds of crying echo across the room.

I stand and go up towards Yuri's coffin. The lid of the coffin was transparent so I could see her. Yuri's long and purple hair was messy and her eyes were sealed shut and she did not let out a single breath. My tear drops hit the coffin as I wipe my tears away. Natsuki and Sayori come up to me and comfort me. "It's okay..."

"We should leave..." I say without a single expression. "But..." Natsuki taps my shoulder. "This is too much for me to take in... But I know exactly what to do now!" I walk out of the funeral area as I hold both Natsuki's and Sayori's hand. "W-Where are we going-" Sayori was dragging along slowly. "You'll see!"

I approach the main centre of the city near the river. It's a long way down... "Are you seriously gonna...?" Natsuki grips on to my hand tightly. "Yes, but It's the only way..." I slowly walk closer to the river. "No, Monika! Don't do it! We need you. You are the only person who is keeping both of us mentally stable! You were the one who started the literature club!"  I slowly look down. "I know... but... It must be done!" I grip on to my pants. The girls kept begging me to not do it.

"It's a long way down... And I don't care!"

I jump down with the other girls almost falling as well. I hit the water making a big splash. As I slowly fall deeper I let the water enter my lungs. As I slowly black out I see faint glimpses of Yuri slowly getting closer and closer. Until I completely black out I get awakened by the feeling of Yuri's lips on mine.

"I love you, Monika..." Yuri whispers in my ear.

"I love you too...."