Until November

Chapter 20

Ben 

A quick handshake and thanks to the other guys and Jocelyn and I are alone, despite the whispers and indelicate glances in our direction. She faces me, her cheeks bright with shame while her father fights his relegation and desperately tries to open the locked door. I couldn't care less about him while he bangs on the window. I toss him an annoyed look and stand in front of the window. He can stare at my ass. I fold my arms over my chest. The force of my gaze directed at her.

"Thank you," she says without meeting my gaze.

"Jocelyn." She ignores my voice. "Jocelyn." I'm less patient this time. "Look at me," I command with every ounce of sincerity I can muster, but my voice is not wavering, not giving her a chance to ignore me. I can almost feel the shame burning off her heart. She's so proud. So beautiful.

She does, she brings her eyes to mine, all that fight in her from a few days ago is full of humiliation for nothing that is her fault. "I need to get him home."

"Where's Noelle?"

She's about to dish a retort that I would even ask, but she curbs whatever comment she was going to make. "Leona's watching her."

"I'm coming with you." It's a start. It's a step.

Her eyes get big. "What? No. Absolutely not."

Instinct knocks at my gut. My resolve is firm. "He's too big for you to handle on your own." I point my thumb over my shoulder. "How do you plan to get him out of the car?"

"He'll wake up when I get to his house. He always does." I hate that she says this so blasé, like this is something someone gets used to.

I swipe the keys out of her hand. "You're not going alone. Not this time."

"What about your game? Your practice? Your world?" She flings her arm out and I look at everyone watching us with an incredible green grass perfectly mowed course in the background, but my gaze lands on her. Jocelyn's outrageous thick hair curving at the tops of her chest, her eyes that tell me so much about what she's feeling. All I want to do is see her naked beneath me while I see in her eyes what she could feel for me. If she watches me while I bring her to the edge... I burn that thought, too afraid I lost my chance, and wanting her all the more because of it.

"This has nothing to do with us. I'll ask Andre or Dylan for your father's address and I'll take him there myself. You can stay here and play my round."

Her face softens into a brief, but stoic sulk. Wordlessly, she reaches for the door handle and gets inside. "Andre and Dylan are complete sellouts. They would tell you."

We get in the car and she only speaks to me to give me directions. Rich's visit is like a giant choppy river between us. This isn't the ideal moment to bring up any of that. I just got her to breathe the same air as me. I steer the car through the winding roads, the houses become further apart, and we're in-and-out of forested areas with leaves falling as I drive. "Why doesn't your brother help?"

Her reaction is nothing but coldness. "Alisha and Mike live further away. They both have demanding jobs and three daughters."

"That's a lot of females in one house."

"You can't even manage one and a half." She finally looks at me, no smile is given.

"I—"

"Let's just get my Dad home." Jocelyn closes her eyes. I want to understand why she's left to deal with her dad. My family was so opposite. A pang hits me. I've been thinking of them so much lately.

"Where's your mom?"

"Not sure. She left when I was young." She looks over her shoulder at the sleeping lumberjack. "Hard to believe, but there was a time he was so good to Mike and me. After we moved out, he started drinking. Sometimes I think he held it all in until he could let loose. He's done rehab, it's never stuck. When you first offered me the money, it was for my house. Now I think I would use it to send him to a higher quality facility. Maybe more long term, too. Not that I want your money anymore."