reasons to go, reasons to stay ➸ camren

chapter thirty two ➸ assessing the damage

Lauren quit her job.

She knew it was an insane decision, but she couldn't leave Camila by herself in the apartment. It wasn't a matter of not trusting her, it was a matter of making sure Camila wasn't alone and afraid at night. Camila's comfort was more important to Lauren than the money her job would have brought in.

The next few days passed by slowly. Camila picked up on sign language quicker than Lauren had expected her too. She still had her goofy games of charades with Rowan, though. Lauren had woken up the other morning to the sound of both of them giggling excessively, because Camila had put a lampshade on her head in the spur of the moment and was trying to get Rowan to realize that she needed to turn on the oven light inside the stove if she wanted to see the cookies they were baking.

Lauren didn't mind that Camila didn't talk. The sound of her laugh was enough to fill the house and make it feel like home again. Everything was brighter when Camila was around.

Most of the clothes they'd bought together were still in the same bags they'd been in when they bought them home. Lauren had walked in on Camila quietly digging through her closet multiple times, stealing one of Lauren's hoodies and disappearing back into her bedroom. Luckily, Camila didn't know that Lauren had seen her. But by the redness of her cheeks whenever Lauren raised an eyebrow at the familiar-looking sweatshirt on Camila's torso, both girls were well aware that the other knew what was going on.

Lauren didn't mind, though. So she started leaving her hoodies hung on the end of her bed so Camila could find them easier. She thought it was adorable.

Lauren would drop off Rowan at school, and then take Camila to work immediately after. She'd make some sort of excuse for her to hang around the bookstore longer than she should, but Camila never questioned her.

Lauren would have to leave eventually, whether it was to run errands or return home. But she'd always return to Camila's work with just enough time so they could pick out a new book together and then pick Rowan up from school.

Camila had just wandered into Lauren's room one night, hugging the black hoodie she had on of Lauren's to her torso and holding a tattered copy of Gone with the Wind, looking at Lauren hopefully.

"Huh?" Lauren asked, picking up the book gently and tracing her fingers across the worn cover.

Camila bit her lip, thinking for a moment before sitting down on the edge of Lauren's bed and nodding at the book shyly.

Lauren set down her cup of coffee and took hold of the book in both hands. "I don't understand...?" she said softly.

Camila crawled up on the bed so she was sitting next to Lauren and gently took the book back out of her hands. Flipping to the first page, she set the book back in Lauren's lap and tapped the first word.

"Scarlett?" Lauren asked, looking down and reading the first word. Camila nodded with a soft smile and traced her finger across the entire sentence.

"Scarlett O'Hara was not beautiful, but men seldom realized it when caught by her charm as the Tarleton twins were..." Lauren read slowly, turning to Camila and raising an eyebrow. Camila clasped her hands together and motioned for Lauren to go on.

"You want me to read to you?" Lauren realized, a soft smile creeping on her face.

Camila nodded shyly.

Lauren simply smiled and nodded before she turned her attention back to the book in her hands. "In her face were too sharply blended the delicate features of her mother, a Coast aristocrat of French descent, and the heavy ones of her florid Irish father. But it was an arresting face, pointed of chin, square of jaw. Her eyes were pale green without a touch of hazel, starred with bristly black lashes and slightly tilted at the ends,"  she paused her reading when Camila tapped her shoulder and pointed to Lauren's eyes.