reasons to go, reasons to stay ➸ camren

chapter thirty six ➸ lifeforms

Camila stared out at the water as the gentle breeze flicked her hair around behind her. Lauren watched the girl from across the table, in love with how intently she appeared to be studying the scenery.

"It's so p-pretty," Camila smiled before turning back to Lauren. "Just l-like you."

Lauren giggled and reached across the table to take both of Camila's hands in hers. She laced their fingers together, meeting the small girl's eyes and running her thumb over the back of her palm.

"Are you happy?" Lauren asked abruptly. Camila raised an eyebrow.

"I mean, like... are you happy here? With me and Ro...?"

Camila nodded quickly, giving Lauren a look of disbelief. "Of c-course!" she laughed. She saw how widely Lauren was smiling and bit her lip to stop herself from smiling like an idiot.

"A-are you?" Camila asked.

"Of course!" Lauren mimicked her, and both girls laughed. Moments later, the waiter came out to bring them the food they'd ordered. Lauren thanked him and looked down at her plate.

"It sm-s-smells like h-heaven," Camila giggled. She'd ordered chicken parmigiana, one of her personal favorites from any restaurant. This plate looked even better than usual, though.

"Ally loves this place," Lauren laughed, unrolling her napkin and placing it on her lap. "That's why she sent us here."

Camila looked up at Lauren before taking her first bite. Humming dramatically, she swallowed and giggled. "Well s-sh-she had a v-valid reason t-t-to love it," Camila nodded. "It's g-good."

Lauren laughed and cut off a piece of her filet mignon. She popped it into her mouth and copied Camila's overdramatic act of satisfaction.

Camila giggled and cut another piece of her food, twirling her fork around in her hands.

"L-laur?" Camila asked when they were almost through dinner. Lauren looked up and nodded, telling Camila to continue.

"I'm s-sc-s-scared."

"Why?" Lauren asked, setting her fork down and placing her hand on top of Camila's. Camila tensed slightly and bit her lip.

"I-I just... I don't w-want to h-h-hurt you, or sc-s-screw up Rowan's l-life." she said quietly. Her gaze dropped down to the table. "I'm s-scared th-that's gonna happen a-again."

Lauren quickly shook her head. "Camila, you being back in Rowan's life is only doing good for her. Trust me, she doesn't have to ask questions about you anymore, she has the real thing. I know she's thankful for that."

Camila smiled softly.

"C'mon," Lauren said softly, paying for their dinner and standing up to take Camila's hand. "I have something to show you."

——

Their hands never left one another's during the car ride.

"Wh-w-why did you k-keep the house?" Camila asked as they neared their destination. She'd figured out where they were going during the duration of the day. She heard Lauren hold her breath for a moment, and the green-eyed girl exhaled slowly after a few seconds of silence.

"I just thought... if you ever decided to come back, that's where you'd go," Lauren said softly. She glanced over at Camila, who was already looking at her. Turning her attention back to the road, she shrugged. "I guess if I sold the house, it'd be like completely giving up on any hope of you coming back."

"But wh-w-why? You th-t-thought I ch-c-cheated..." Camila bit her lip.

"I... It just didn't seem like something you would do, Mila. It happened so suddenly... I just... I couldn't come to terms with the fact that you 'cheated', but what was I supposed to do, y'know? You just... left," she took a deep breath. "And I'm not mad at you, I don't resent you for what you did. You didn't have a choice, like Ally said. But I had no way of contacting you... so I just had to wait. And that's what I'd been doing... waiting."