Months ago: a few days after the party
Me:
BRO
Husband:
I'm not your bro
Me:
Okay bUt BRO!!
Husband:
I'm blocking you if you say that again
Me:
R00d :(
Husband:
Yeah okay
Tell me why you called me bro
Me:
YEAH OMG BR-
A
YEAH BRA LISTEN TO ME
Husband:
Bye
Me:
Nuuu hold up :(((
Bro is my instinct to call someone when I have some great news to share
So LISTEN
Husband:
Sparing one time, alright
What is itttt
Me:
IM LEAVING THAT JACKASS JYP :DDD
Husband:
When were you two together?
Me:
HA HA HA WOW GREAT JOKE I PASSED OUT LAUGHING COMEDY IS DEAD WITHOUT YOU
Husband:
Now why are you learning from me???
What's wrong w you???
Me:
I'm the Jonas virus from All Of Us Are Dead
I learn and evolve
Husband:
You literally just called yourself a zombie virus
Me:
...okay let's not think about that
Force of habit
Husband:
Why are you like this
Me:
LET'S TALK ABOUT MY GREAT NEWS!!!
IM OVER WITH JYP FR NOW
I CALL IT QUITS
CAN'T PUT UP W HIM ANYMORE
Husband:
YEAH but why?
Me:
He put me out of my debut group bec I weighed 3 kgs extra
Like???
What's wrong w you broskii???
Get checked???
Husband:
I think he's scared of me
You could've just asked me to scare him off
Changed the contact name to 'Thug life'!
Thug life:
Did you change my contact or smth?
Me:
GASP-
HOW DO YOU KNOW
Thug life:
You went offline for three exact minutes
What else could you be doing?
Me:
Awww you're counting the minutes now
Thug life:
Go away
Me:
Hehehe
You're so soft for me
Thug life:
Yeah yeah whatever
Me:
If I had known that Wattpad tsunderes existed irl, I'd have read them a bit more to see how to annoy you
Thug life:
What did you change my name to?
Me:
Oooh straight to the point, I see
You don't need to know
Thug life:
Istg Yiren
If it's smth tacky, I'm coming over with a pistol
Me:
Ayo...
Come over
Thug life:
.......
This isn't what I was expecting
Me:
Let's meet uppppp
Thug life:
Look who can't live without me
Me:
Yeah yeah whatever
Thug life:
Stop copying me
Me:
I'm not copying you
Thug life:
Yea you are
Me:
No
Thug life:
Yeah
Me:
No
Thug life:
I'll see for myself when I come over
Me:
Oooh sexc
Thug life:
About time you realized
Me:
...
Gonna forward you my address
Thug life:
YAH WTF
DON'T HAVE THOSE THOUGHTS
Me:
Eh
Just come over
(a/n: ಡ ͜ ʖ ಡ
I have exams, and look what I'm doing instead of studying Doctor Faustus
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Minho's Main Hoe » lee know
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