New Mom Life Blog!

How to have joy and optimism when you are disappointed

Hello readers,

I am writing this post with tears sticking to my face. If you are wondering I am okay. I am just dealing with a disappointment on my end. And I find a good way to cope with that is to write. So here is the story of what happened this morning.

So some of you may know and others are hearing about this for the first time but Dan and I are in the process of trying to find a house. We have been living in an apartment for far to long. It will do for now but if we ever want to have more kids ( keep in mind it wont be for a long time, possible ever depending on what God has to say) we just need something bigger is all. We have been working with our life group leader Brooke- who is a realtor- on finding our dream home. We even have the loan all set up and ready to go. All we have to do is find a house.

At first our budget was on the cheaper side and we struggled to find anything. Out of everything the surrounding areas three houses fit our budget. And they were mediocre at best. Once we increased our budget more options came in our way. We have scheduled tours to see houses starting next week. 

There was one house in particular I loved just by looking at pictures. It was a little ranch style house. Five bedrooms, at least two bathrooms, a basement, a yard, and a garage, and a little tool shed in the back. I felt like it was perfect for us. Plus, it was under our original budget which is rare for a house like that. 

I was so excited to see that house. Even though we are seeing four to five different houses in the next two weeks that was the one I was looking forward to the most.  I dont know why but my heart was gravitating towards that house and I never even seen it in person. I dont know if it was because I liked the style or if it has all the room I could picture us using or what. But something kept saying this is it.  Granted, I would of waited until we saw the other ones before making a final decision but I just felt like that would of been it.

And then I get an email from our relator this morning. Two of the houses we were going to look at are under contract. Can you guess which one? Yes, the ranch style one I was so estatic about. That was why I was crying. I called my husband and told him the news.

Dan said he was sorry but then he reminded me of something important. 

" Keep in mind we are just starting out. We have only been at this for a week. I know its hard but we will find something. Who knows we might find something we like even better."

I know hes right. But it was just so hard in that moment not to cry. I knew deep down that if we were meant to be in that house we would be. But it is not in Gods plans for us.

Proverbs 24: 3- 4 says this: By wisdom a house is built, and through understanding it is established;  through knowledge its rooms are filled with rare and beautiful treasures.

I want to find a home. A place where my family can serve the Lord. A place where it is welcoming and we can have people over. I want it to be a place of love and decorate it with beautiful treasures and memories. And I think that verse speaks as to why the house I was looking at is not ours. Even though it has everything I wanted room wise it might not be what I need. Plus, it would of been the first house we looked at. If I would of fell in love with it I probably would of been biased and not given the others a chance. I would of had my eyes set on the first house and nothing else. Its difficult not to do. I would of been clouded with "lust" for this house that I probably wouldn't have been wise. And even though it sucks that two of the properties are under contract I will be okay.

Why? Because those houses were meant for someone else. Not us. We haven not found our house yet. Who knows when we honestly will? It might be soon it might be in a few years. But I do know that one day we will get a house. And if we use God's wisdom in finding that place it will be everything we dreamed of and much more. God is good and in control of this.  I just have to be patient and have grace. I would appreciate prayers as Dan and I go on this journey. I know how difficult it can be now. For those of you going through the same thing hang in there. We can do it.