𝐓𝐨𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐝𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐒𝐤𝐲: 𝐏𝐨𝐞𝐭𝐢𝐜 𝐓𝐚𝐥𝐞𝐬

Dreams pt.3

#Dream :

I see myself having an exam of economics. And a certain ma'am was there and i saw that dreamgirl/ stranger girl of my school was sitting in the last bench ig. And idr much but something happened like i kept my bag over her bag when she was away from there and due to that we had quite a quarell and she said a lot of rude harsh things to me. And then we both were angry after school ended we went out and i was going to take an autorickshaw to my home from school as usual. But then i saw her sitting beside me on it. Although we were being a bit cringey- but eventually i tried to apologise to her for my mistake and whatever argument we had and fortunately she too accepted her mistake and we both started talking normally. Whew. While talking on the way, i realised a lot about her quickly idkyhow. Earlier i had an opinion about her being selfish and bad, but now i felt she's not really so bad as she seemed earlier and she's pretty kind person just like me. She was so cheerful and cute uwu hshshsh but her smile had the same hidden depths as mine, her happiness seemed to be hiding a darkness no one knew about. I was so lost and mesmerized in her that i forgot my home had already passed behind, i got to know her home is on a certain road along the station. But when the vehicle stopped at it's destination and we bid farewell, she instead of going to her home, turned and walked towards the railway station. I was confused a bit and wondering when i saw her face it seemed pretty sad and idk i felt she was depressed so in worry, i didn't go home instead i secretly stalked her and followed her. And soon she turned behind and caught me-

After that soon the dream ended-

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Again i saw a dream few months later, this time there was some war kinda condition going on and i saw in tv about hindu and muslims fighting each other and lots of killings happening, and i was again worried about my dreamgirl

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In another dream of that day ig, i saw myself had called her to meet me somewhere, it was an empty street somewhere and pretty late that time and i saw my phone some messages came from Rima (an online friend of my school thru some anime-fandom whatsapp group back then) she texted me "I'm sorry" and she wasn't replying me anything i was so anxious what happened and waited for long alone there but neither any reply came nor that dreamgirl i didn't knew why i saw Rima in this dream of her tho-

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Reality:

Bg facts: I used to be excessively bullied by ppl in my school life coz i was very innocent and "normal" person. Ppl were very abnormal and used to make fun of me especially in envy Lol and many hated me for nothing. If u read my melancholy x euphoria book u will know about all that more ig some thoughts on life and bonds etc, given there. Mostly I've just had fake friends and either they abandoned me for others or i left em coz they couldn't understand or respect my feelings or friendship.

So there was a group once i was in my class 11-12. Otakus united and there i met a girl named Rima who used to be very nice person towards me, the only girl whom i could trust and open up to. Before that, i never had anyone whom i could share any personal thoughts with freely.

Rima used to be close with me once aand we used to talk a lot and Eventually with time i got to know Urjo is her bff!! Nickname of that stranger girl whom i suspected to be my dreamgirl. I used to talk with Rima about some of my old dreams, i told her how my dreams used to come true and even i saw disasters etc things some days before they happened. She told me that maybe i get premonitions (foreseeing future thru dreams)

So finally a part of that dream was true, Rima was related with this girl really. As both were bffs.

And also, i got to know soon after the second dream mentioned above, it did came true too! Those CAA and NRC stuffs protests were happening and lots of Hindu vs Muslim conflicts were happening in india (thanku congress and rahul ka bacha for spreading stigma and creating wars between religions, when caa was done for minorities of other country Hiindu sikh etc, ppl here be like its wrong. Wow man even hindus in our nation dont understand the condition of hindu/sikhs/Christian in other muslim dominated country like pakistan XD) - i was so anxious about all these things happening shit indians killing each other for protecting "minorities of india" who didn't had anything to do with case idky ppl involve unnecessary things in cases and relevance with my premonitions.

Meanwhile, as you read the poems in my books in the first 2-3 parts, i used to be

So later on i decided to somehow seek this girl urjo to tell her everything about these dreams and all.

(Old personal notes below related to these)

Lemme tell you,
That dream i told of her rmr? That school wali dream and going to railway station at top of this part?

A part of it came true... When we had one practical eco exam..

My section was to sit with Commerce.
But maam changed plan and we had to sit with Section Arts.

I entered the class. The same maam in dream was there in same kinda place. The room was same, the people were the same. That stranger girl, urjo, was sitting in the same last bench as in dream....

And i sat in one different row later, 3rd bench... A cute looking bag caught my attention ahead of me. But no one sat in the bench i felt a great urge to touch that bag.. but i was afraid so i didn't...
A guy Arihant beside me was play with Aditya. And he took Aditya's pencil and hid it in that cute bag infront idk whose. And it reminded me of that dream i saw where i quarrelled with her.. and so i quickly told him to get the pencil out. He wasn't willing but i forced him to do so then whew he got the pencil out. All the time i was thinking about two things. One was Urjobon last bench. And one was that cute bag infront of me...

I was heads down on the bench resting as ma'am was very busy in some purpose so for almost an hour we had to wait there and everyone was chit chatting. Then i saw that Urjaasi came to the next row's one bench and sat there. (Not the row of benches in which i was)
Then i fell asleep lol XD
I woke up with some girl laughing or giggling infront of my bench... and the vocie went away. I kept my eyes closed as i was very sleepy. Just when suddenly one guy of my section, Ishan hit my back with a bonk to wake me up. He told everyone in this section told to go to a different room so they went only i am sleeping here wow XD

But i was lost and sleepy...

And then i realised that Urjo was just talking to her friends in back bench or the other bench. That bag infront of my bench was hers only.

Meanwhile, during mid 2019, Rima suddenly started ignoring me for no reason and this hurted me as she was ignoring only me didnt talk with me anymore, while she was talking to other friends normally, i got to know off, and i asked her about it after 3 days of ignorance and she replied she was busy. I knew it, fakers. After some time , btw i used to be an environment simp and posted something about that Amazon wildfires and ppl ignoring it etc rants in my wsp status, to which rima rudely replied something and judged my personal rants which hurt my sentiments a lot and we had a bit of argument and i blocked her for a while coz she brought unnecessary things in the convo like claiming my mentality bad etc etc, all this hurted me a lot, and she blocked me too. I unblocked her in a while and even tho we both had faults mostly she, still i apologized to her fb acc and asked her to understand but she never replied me for long. She ignored my msg for more than 1-2 months in ego ig and when i texted her that I'm crushing on her bff she replied me and somehow we started talking a bit again, tho no more like earlier very rarely.

Now basically back then no one used to be my friend, and ppl used to ignore me as i was very simple and not so stylish or extroverted, and i was really alone but with time i started recalling those old dreams, introspecting things, became so philosophical and soon i was realising that I'm really being in love with that girl i used to see in my dream and had a suspicion whether if its urjo or not. I wasn't sure but still considered her to be the person. The fact how reality was being connected to my dreams was really spooky in some ways. And eventually even being a loner automatically i started being happier with time in this love with my dreamgirl. I used to think I'm just crushing or something and not love but the more i tried to resist the more i was lost in this feeling. This feeling of newfound love brought me a lot of happiness and bliss even when i wasn't getting a chance to talk with her. I had some hopes tho, thinking maybe someday she will be at least my friend i would be so happy. I even started sketching after years, coz of side effects of this first love XD i was more of self lover than ever before and even when she never talked with me, my feelings were realy very pure about her without any needs. I wanted to be with her so much, But those sad endings in dreams and some things made me very hopeless. As i was just a stranger to her. If i will tell all this, will she even believe me?

[ To be continued in next part ]