Cloaked in Green

Chp.8: Erthil & Estel

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This is getting ridiculous.

Like honestly!

Why do I keep losing my composure like this? Huh? Never have I let my emotions be in such a disarray before. I can't even look at him without losing myself. It doesn't make sense to me. How can a mere glance from this dwarf prince cause such an avalanche of feelings and warmth to flow inside me.

Oh. The Warmth.

How can I possibly describe it in a way that doesn't make me sound so...urgh. It's such an overwhelming feeling that just spreads from the deepest parts of your being. It's an experience that could and does rival any other feeling of warmth that I have ever felt.

That warmth that you get by resting by a fireplace?

Nope.

The warmth that spreads inside you after drinking a hot beverage on a cold night?

Nah.

The warmth that comes with the Spring sun soaking in your skin?

Not even close.

It's such an impossible feeling that I can't possibly describe to anyone else that hasn't already experienced it themselves. Which honestly, only adds to the madness and ridiculousness of this whole situation. How on earth am I supposed to try and figure this mess out? If I can't even explain what it is I am feeling.

Then again...it could just be gas that I am feeling, for all I know. Walking along the path, I mind clicked back on as I swiftly moved my way through the grumbling dwarfs to where Gandalf was walking in the front.

"That could have gone a little bit more smoothly." He mumbled quietly as he acknowledged me. Glancing up at him, I raised an eyebrow

"What?" I mumbled back. "The revelation to everyone that my mother is dead or you purposely ignoring Thorin's direct orders."

Grumbling Gandalf sent a small glare at me, huffing. "There was no other possible escape route that we could've taken. Plus he was being nothing but stubborn."

"You and I both know the reasons why the Dwarves of Erebor distaste the Elves and vice-versa." I reasoned, nudging his side with my elbow. "Plus isn't stubbornness a dwarf trait? They probably can't help it anymore then you are with your meddling."

"I don't meddle-" Catching the exasperated look on my face, his mouth quickly snapped shut before rephrasing. "In areas that could not help benefit the outcome of this quest."

I let out a small scoff at his statement, I moved to walk ahead of him as we started across the Bridge of Rivendell. Taking a long, deep breath as the smell of the Bruinen River below, fluttered up to us. Busking in the smell of my former home, I felt myself drift off, completely zoning out the rest of the way up. Reminiscing of a time and place where trouble was few and far between. A time where all I had to worry about taking care of my older brother and mother and I wasn't any more important than the fruit that falls from the trees.

Now as I followed behind Gandalf walking onto the platform leading to the stairs of the north entrance. This was when I noticed how tense the rest of the dwarven company was. They all had at least one weapon (in Fili's case, three) gripped tightly in one of their hands as they all took in the surrounding scenery. As if expecting an army of orcs to jump out and attack them.

I sighed, disappointed in myself for not fighting harder against Gandalf for doing this. When I saw where we were heading I should have just said something or done something. It probably would have been easier to just take the hidden path around the valley. Only having Thorin, Balin and Bilbo come in with Gandalf and me to talk with Elrond about the map, while the others rested a little easier away from all the elven stuff. Though I know none of them would probably agree to that. Most likely saying something along the lines of "I'm a dwarf I need no human lass to pity me."