Twenty-One

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Y/N: If you don't kiss your cat on their tiny soft little fotehead then what the fck are you even doing?
Thyme: Yelling at them for trying to eat plastic.

*̊˙˚˙⑅*❀❀*⑅。・:*。・:*

MJ: I wish I had a super tight-knit group of friends that I fought crime with.
Thyme: I wish I had a super tight-knit group of friends that I committed crimes with.
Kavin: I wish I had a super tight group of criminals that I knitted with.
Y/N: I wish I had a group of friends.
Ren: I wish I could knit.

*̊˙˚˙⑅*❀❀*⑅。・:*。・:*

Thyme, seeing a banana on the car seat: What the FCK??
Thyme, buckling the banana up: Fcking buckle UP, it's the LAW!

*̊˙˚˙⑅*❀❀*⑅。・:*。・:*

Kaning: Define "dream".
Gorya: Dream - the first thing people abandon when they learn how the world works.
Y/N: That's too dark!

*̊˙˚˙⑅*❀❀*⑅。・:*。・:*

Y/N: Ugh, there's always that weak btch in the group who isn't down with murder.
Y/N: *glares at Ren*
Ren Well, sorry I have morals!

*̊˙˚˙⑅*❀❀*⑅。・:*。・:*

Gorya: Imagine if someone handed you a box full of all the things you lost throughout your life.
Y/N: It would be nice to have my sense of purpose back...
Ren: Oh wow, my childhood innocence! Thank you for finding this.
MJ: My will to live! I haven't seen this in years.
Thyme: I knew I lost that potential somewhere.
Kavin: Mental stability, my old friend!
Gorya: Jeez, could you guys lighten up a little?

*̊˙˚˙⑅*❀❀*⑅。・:*。・:*

Kavin, whispering in Y/N's ear: Would you like fries with that...?
Y/N, biting their lip: Oh yeah, baby.
Kavin, touching Y/N's inner thigh:Would you like to... Super size that...
Ren, poking his head through the door: We're out of toilet paper.
Y/N: ...What?
Thyme, poking his head through the window: He said he's out of toilet paper.
Kavin: What the fck. Can we get some privacy in here?
MJ, poking his head through the ceiling vent: No.
Gorya: I swear, everyone in this household is high.

*̊˙˚˙⑅*❀❀*⑅。・:*。・:*

Y/N: Kavin's refusing to wear his glasses!
Kavin: Y/N, look, I wore the glasses for a day. My eyes are much better now. Watch.
Kavin: *points to Ren* Ren.
Kavin: *points to Thyme* Thyme.
Kavin: *points to MJ* Sasquatch.

*̊˙˚˙⑅*❀❀*⑅。・:*。・:*

Y/N: If you took a shot for every time you made a bad decision, how drunk would you be?
Ren: Maybe a bit tipsy?
MJ: Drunk.
Kavin: Wasted.
Thyme: Dead.

*̊˙˚˙⑅*❀❀*⑅。・:*。・:*

Y/N: You read my diary?
MJ: At first I did not know it was your diary. I thought it was a very sad handwritten book.

*̊˙˚˙⑅*❀❀*⑅。・:*。・:*

Thyme: Tia's gonna kill me.
Ren: No, she'll probably make me do it.

*̊˙˚˙⑅*❀❀*⑅。・:*。・:*

Y/N Guys, I didn't memorize my lines!
MJ: Just use your lack of common sense! Everyone knows the characters in plays are dumb as fck!
*During the play*
Gorya: Hey! You finally made it! Did you get the donuts?
Y/N: W-what're donuts?

*̊˙˚˙⑅*❀❀*⑅。・:*。・:*

Thyme: A party is a celebration of a life, bringing people together to let the guest of honor know how much they're loved. Ren has done so much for us. This is our chance to do something for him.
Kavin: By forcing him to have fun at a party that he doesn't want to be at?
Thyme: I knew you'd understand.

*̊˙˚˙⑅*❀❀*⑅。・:*。・:*

Kaning: That sounds like a terrible plan.
Y/N: Oh, we've had worse.

*̊˙˚˙⑅*❀❀*⑅。・:*。・:*

Kavin: What time is it?
MJ: I don't know, pass me that saxaphone and we'll find out
MJ: *BLASTS the saxaphone*
Thyme: WHO THE FCK IS PLAYING THE SAXAPHONE AT TWO IN THE FCKING MORNING
MJ: It's 2 am.

*̊˙˚˙⑅*❀❀*⑅。・:*。・:*

Gorya: What's it like being tall?
Kaning: Is it nice?
Gorya: Can you reach comfortably for the cupboards?
Ren: We live in constant fear of the short ones who, in my experience, will climb 4 chairs, 2 boxes, a small coffee table and 6 oddly placed stools to get what they want.
Y/N: It was one time!

*̊˙˚˙⑅*❀❀*⑅。・:*。・:*

Y/N: Kavin, I'm afraid.
Kavin: Just stay close to Thyme.
Y/N: That's why I'm afraid.

*̊˙˚˙⑅*❀❀*⑅。・:*。・:*

Thyme: My condolences to anyone who knew me two years ago.
Y/N: My condolences to anyone who still knows me now.

*̊˙˚˙⑅*❀❀*⑅。・:*。・:*

Y/N: Rules of fashion! 1. You think it's pretty? 2. Wear it.
MJ: Okay, but I don't know how I'm gonna wear you.
Kavin: Oh, you smooth fck.
Ren: You obviously haven't read silence of the lambs.

*̊˙˚˙⑅*❀❀*⑅。・:*。・:*

Gorya: Question. When they shot Bambi's mother, did you find that a sad moment...at all?
Thyme: I'm sure she's mounted on a nice wall in a fine home somewhere.
| A/N: He lied, he did cry |

*̊˙˚˙⑅*❀❀*⑅。・:*。・:*

Kaning: Listen, we're done, we're over! Okay?
Tesla: Whatever btch, you ain't never gonna find no one like me.
Kaning: Yeah, that's the point shthead!

*̊˙˚˙⑅*❀❀*⑅。・:*。・:*

MJ: I am 39 cheetos tall.
Ren: Why... are you measuring your height in cheetos?
MJ: Because we're out of doritos.

*̊˙˚˙⑅*❀❀*⑅。・:*。・:*

Y/N: Onion rings are vegetable donuts.
Gorya, used to Y/N being dumb: Sure...
Y/N: Your stomach thinks all potatoes are mashed.
Gorya: Okay?
Y/N: Lasagna is spaghetti flavored cake.
Gorya:
Y/N: Lobsters are mermaid scorpions.
Gorya: Please stop-
Thyme, interested: No, no, Y/N, keep going.

*̊˙˚˙⑅*❀❀*⑅。・:*。・:*

MJ: I think I should be allowed on ghost hunter tv shows.
Kavin: I think that would be dangerous for the ghosts.

*̊˙˚˙⑅*❀❀*⑅。・:*。・:*

Y/N: Where are your parents?
Thyme: What are parents?
Y/N: That's just about the saddest thing I ever heard get said.

*̊˙˚˙⑅*❀❀*⑅。・:*。・:*

Zoom: Your internet connection is unstable.
Gorya: You should see my life.

*̊˙˚˙⑅*❀❀*⑅。・:*。・:*

Kavin: I have a mommy kink.
Y/N: So... I'm supposed to act like your mom?
Kavin: Yes!
Y/N: Why are all these dmn dishes in the sink?

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