Born to be Yours (SS #1)

19

My busy days become my draining days. Each schedule I've had has weakened both my physical and mental health. When I go home, my body immediately falls asleep and I easily fall asleep. Sometimes I didn't eat my dinner and sometimes my stomach was empty. 

Modeling is such a heavy job, and you need a lot of energy to do your best. 

Kapag umuuwi ako sa condo. Si Ate Taryn laging seryoso ang mga tingin sakin pero kapag nakaidlip na ako sa kama dahil pagod at walang kain ay magagalit siya sa akin.

I can tell that she really cares about me and that she's worried so much. She's a silent but generous sister to me. 

It's Saturday right now. My body is slowly returning to normal progress. Those weekends are so tough and the struggle is hard. Katatapos ko lang magpunta sa meeting namin.

I did the right thing, and I know that I didn't regret it. I'll listen to what my heart wants.

Napangiti ako kasabay noon ay ang pagtunog ng phone ko. Zion's calling to me. He always does it and I have not seen him lately. We both got busier, but he never failed to call me at night. 

"Hey! How's your day? " He asked immediately. Lagi siyang nagtatanong kung ano ganap sa araw ko ngayong araw.

He's my choice and my chosen one.

"I'm fine, and my body is calm right now. How about you?" Sumubo ako ng Ice cream habang nakatitig sa phone ko.

He called me through videocall. He always wanted to see my face. 

"Actually, if I don't see you, I am always at the gym. Tinapos ko lang ang routine ko" Inayos niya ang messy hair niya.

Nailunok ko nalang ang malamig na Ice Cream. Is that his way of telling me he didn't see me these days? 

"W-We always have a video call. You always see me."

"This setup is not good. I wanted you personally and the whole you that I wanted to see. Can I come there? " He said directly.

Habang tumatagal ay mas lalo siyang nagiging totoo at pinapakita niya talaga ang ugali niya.

He's a controller, and when he wants, he gets in our way.

Umiling ako sa gusto niyang mangyari. Masyado akong busy ngayon.

"Hindi pwede, Zion. It's hard for me to skip one of our investors and companies. Don't worry about the right time if we are both free. We'll see each other soon." Kumbinsi ko sa kanya.

"Bakit ba masyadong maikli ang oras? It felt like years." Ani niya.

Natawa ako sa sinabi niya. Napatingin ako sa orasan at nakitang 10:03PM na. Kailangan ko ng maligo para mabuhay diwa ko.

"I'm going now. Don't let me occupy your mind. You'll fall even more." Saad ko. Parang sa sarili ko ata ito sabihin.

"Sia, I fall harder every time we talk or even see each other like this. Why are you like this? Tell me."

"You should ask that of yourself, Zion. I just did what I am capable of and I'm showing you the real me."

"Can you immediately say yes when I say the word "marry me?"

"W-What? You jerk, stop telling me that. Ikaw ang magbibigay sakin ng sakit. Baka nakakalimutan mo Zion Zandejas, You are courting me right now, but you immediately want me to be your wife, and now you want to marry me. Too fast" Pasigaw kong sabi. Lagi akong nagugulat sa mga lumalabas sa bibig niya.

"The result was unexpected. Can't help it, baby."

"Sobrang bilis mo"

"Kung mabilis ako baka ngayon nakaapat na tayo" Nakangisi niyang sabi. Halos mahulog ko ang phone ko dahil sa sinabi niya.

This is Zion the Great. He is really great with his words. He doesn't stop saying it. I think I can talk to Ate Senna about this. I really need a word from her.

Nagpaalam na agad ako sa kanya dahil baka makalimutan ko kung ano ang gagawin ko. Naligo na agad ako kahit pagod ako. Late na naman akong nakauwi. Nagpupunas ako ng buhok kasabay ng pagbukas ng pinto ko.

Si Ate Taryn.

"May kailangan ka Ate?" Tanong ko agad. She never entered my room. Kaya nakakapagtaka.

Katahimikan ang namayani sa aming dalawa kaya nagpatuloy ako sa paglalakad pero natigil din ng dahil sa sinabi niya.

"Stay away from him" She said.

Is she talking about Zion? Why? Napaharap agad ako kay Ate Taryn.

"Why? Kilala mo ba siya simula palang?" Gusto kong marinig kung ano man ang sasabihin ni Ate Taryn.

Is there a reason why she would like me to stay away from Zion?

Nakatingin lang sakin si Ate. Wala siyang salitang nabigkas man lang. Naiinis ako kasi kung ano man ang gusto niyang sabihin sakin ay hindi niya man lang magawa.

"Why are you always like that? Tell me why I should stay away from him. Ayoko nang mag-isip ng mag-isip dahil pagod na ako Ate kakaisip kung bakit ka naging ganito. Your changes stink and I really hate them, especially you." Inis kong sabi. Walang reaksyon ang mukha niya.

I felt like she was not my sister anymore. She's unknown to me and a stranger.

"Ano papasok ka lang ba dito para sabihin iyon? Why? Don't you want me to be happy? Or do you want me to stay miserable the moment you've left us?" Napasigaw na ako. Gustong gusto kong malaman ang totoo.

I saw how she bit her lower lip. Pinipigilan niya ang sarili. Why can't she just tell me why I should stay away from Zion? I'm clueless right now.

Nakita kong binuka niya ang bibig niya. I was hoping that she would tell me everything, even the day she left us. 

"He's going to break your heart. The sooner I tell you, the better. Don't listen to your heart. Freesia--"

This is the first time she called me by my name after she left.

"And you want me to listen to you either? I respect you so much to the point that even my happiness slowly leaves me. Ngayon nalang ulit ako naging masaya. Bakit kailangang umuwi ka pa at maging hadlang sa lahat?" Mahina kong saad.

I feel bad blaming her, but I have the right because I'm the one who she left with broken pieces. 

If she doesn't want to tell me, then I'll accept what heartbreak will come to me. First of all, I wanted to feel love and the outcome would satisfy the meaning of love. 

"Pagod ako ngayon. Kailangan ko ng magpahinga" Mahina kong sabi sa kanya. Hindi ko na siya tinignan pa basta nalang akong naglakad papunta sa kwarto.

Ngunit nagulat ako nang may naramdaman akong yakap galing sa likuran ko. Namuo ang mga luha sa mga mata ko sa sobrang higpit ng yakap ng Ate ko.

That's the kind of hug that I've been missing and want to feel again. I have been longing for this. To embrace me with love. 

"I'm not the one who has to tell you, but I'll protect you. I hope you don't fall too hard." She whispered to me.

Naguguluhan ako pero tumango nalang ako. Niyakap ko ang mga braso ni Ate Taryn na nakapulupot sa leeg ko. She's taller than me. I felt a kiss in the back of my hair. I think she's slowly coming back to us.