"Parsoo raat nu aaya si" she told her masi as shehnaaz kept her head in her masi's lap. The woman nodded not knowing what to say . Her dad and mama talked to each other not knowing exactly what to say to shehnaaz.
The cremation had been done next day in the afternoon. Thereafter a few of crowd had returned back and many had stayed for the family, and even more were to visit in coming 10 days that were the mourning period.
A woman brought her a cup of tea with some rusks, its been a day since anyone has eaten. Shehnaaz took the tea from her hands asking for a blanket .
"Pichle panj saalan ch kinne log chale gye na..pehla mom fir naana naani...hun harinder.Eh kadi khatam hoye ga mere naal ?"(last 5 yrs so many ppl left ..mom ,grandma, grandpa now harinder ...will this ever stop for me?" Shehnaaz asked looking at whatever part of her family was there.
"Pta mamu usko nahi aana tha mummyji ne force kar k bulaya...woh product ready kar k bombay shift hota shayad ." She told about her dead husband who worked as a ML scientist in some Faang company.He had a bright future , a prosperous one ,only if he hadn't died in the accident or maybe never married her , she thought.
Harinder and she were classmates in school ,educated in one of the elitist convents in town .They were friendly to each other ,never friends though.Years later when harinders mother had asked for shehnaaz's hand in marriage, the families and the couple had happily agreed owing to years of relations between the families.Shehnaaz was a veterinary medicine post graduate working with the government of punjab, therefore had stayed back in punjab ,while harinder continued his work in Gurgaon.
"Roti ban gyi aa...aakr kha lo saare " a man called.Shehnaaz walked along with her masi , dad ,mama and his wife.
"2 meehne hoye si", "ae ude naal kyu ni gyi si", "bandi ni si ki aehna di", "27 saal di aa bechari" "pehla maa hun khasam"....("its been only 3 months","why didn't she go with him"," did they not get along well","she's just 27","first her mother now husband"...)..... she he heard countless words as she took a few morsels of rice from her plate.
Her masi looked at her , knowing this would be a norm now.Her dad held shehnaaz's hand and tightened his grip over is ,maybe assuring her or himself.
"Its going to be very tough beta , you have to hang on ,and hold on as long as you can" ,her maami told.
"Wahi toh kar rahi hu saalon se ...khatam hi ni hota...aur kitna?"
''Mera bhadur baccha ...tu waheguru te bharosa rakh ..oh aape honsla bakshu ga..." ,her dad said kissing her forhead.
"Samya ki flight hai kal ki ...mamu aap kisi ko bol k usko Airport se pickup karwadoge?",she asked.
Was she not behaving correctly for a widowed woman, sure she had shed some silent tears but an outburst of emotions , it didn't come.She wondered if she loved harinder at all, even as a friend?
Harinder was a good person ,he did have some ego issues and a some temper problems, but barring that he was a great company...throughly chivalrous, funny ,very witty and extremely handsome with hazel olive big eyes.He had a habit of teasing her, they had their share of fights in school.,but never once had they even had an argument since they were engaged. He had treated her well,given her a place in his home...if not loved her he had for sure befriended her and respected her.
Shehnaaz smiled as she thought of him ,slowly drifting to sleep.
Hey !
Thanks for reading.
I write for happiness .
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