Life had never been simpler for Sidharth, but it hadn't been complex. Except for a few bouts life had given him, the problems that Sidharth had often come face to face with, were created by people or his own mismanagement. He had lost his dad early on ,after a chronic illness.That had shaken him ,kind of brought him to senses.His dad was his personal superhero,how could he die?Sidharth was so used to his dad being admitted in hospital and then getting well; that Sidharth had not expected him to die ,when he did. His dad died of COPD.
Sidharth was youngest in family, loved by all.His parents got him educated in best possible way, his parenting was a careful one ,they would not even scold Sidharth in front of anyone;let alone make him feel humiliation for a second.
He had two elder sisters with whom he would play and fight all day.Preeti was eldest ,like a second mother to him,a friendlier one.Even ,after his dad's death ,Sidharth was loved deeply ,his family understood grief and helped each other and Sidharth over come it.
Shehnaaz on the other hand ,came from a modern ,educated, upper middle class ; but a feudal family.In feudal families, you don't do as you wish ,you do as you are told. SHE was the elder daughter,her parents too ,whatever little presence they had ,was in Samya ,her sister's life .So grief or not ,no body had taught her ,the correct way of dealing with emotions.The surplus of emotions that she would feel ,were bottled up ,kept in a store room,until one day the store room couldn't hold any more and starting shaking...it would spill everyday ever-since, looking to break the banks and inundate everything that came its way.
"Take 5 ,seen 254..",
The shot was given and the day came to an end.It was the end to long course of outdoor shoots. Now they would be back to their studio work.
Shehnaaz had been sleeping for an hour or so,when she woke up.Getting up ,she felt a slight headache, she had exhausted herself crying .She stepped out of bed and walked outside the room.Following the trail of sounds coming ,she reached the kitchen ,Rita ji had been making herself some tea.
"Uth Gaye? Sar dukh raha h?" ,she questioned sana.
"Ha dehydration headache I guess....lemon h kya aapke paas?" ,Shehnaaz spoke.
Rita pointed her to the fridge ,Shehnaaz took lemons out ."aapke liye bhi bna du...neembu pani?" Shenaaz asked.
"Ha bna de...thoda aur...fridge me rakh dungi ...sidharth k liye!"
Grapping the lemons ,Shehnaaz squeezed them into the water. Taking a measured amount of sugar and salt she added into it.
"Kind off works like ORS ,hostel me bna te the", Shehnaaz spoke.
The ladies walked to the sitting area, taking a couch .
"Thank you aunty!"
"Aunty ko toh thank you bolna padega....but agr maa jaisa maanti h toh nahi ...".,rita spoke extending her hand over Shehnaaz's head.
"Kaise hua tha?", she questioned.
Shehnaaz looked at her, Rita's eyes did not have pity or sympathy. They had something else Shehnaaz had not expected, courage and strength, that she would bestow upon Shehnaaz. Her eyes held admiration for Shehnaaz and understanding too? Did she understand Shehnaaz?
"Accident hua tha ...3 mahine hue the shaadi ko...", tears filled her eyes as she spoke.
She looked towards the ceiling, asking heavens above not to let her crumble again.Rita ji held her hand, pressed it tightly. "Himmat ....jaise aaj tak rakhi h na waise hi ...himmat rakhni h....likha hua toh hoke rehta h..lagta nahi h lekin kismet bhot taqatwar hoti h....khud ko blame mat karna....na uski maut k liye na apbe zinda reh Jane k liye..tu zinda h kyuki tera kaam abhi yaha poora nahi hua...uska ho gya hoga...woh chla gya h beta...tu apna khyaal rakh"
Shehnaaz nodded keeping ,her head in the older woman's lap.
"Ma woh meri car le k gya.tha...kyu ki maine zidd ki uski car lene ki?"
"Bacche tune zidd ki tih kya ..bahana hota h....kehte h death k angels jab kisi ko lene aate h...toh idr pe koi na koi bahana rachta h... phir log death k angels ko blame nahi karte!"
"Pyaar karti thi us se?"
"PTA nahi maa...hum log classmates the school me ,phir jab sab ne kaha shadi karlo...toh maine bhi maan liya...na karne ka koi karan nhi tha...."
"Par apna tha na bacche ...toh apno k jaane ka dard toh hota h na?"
"Ma aapko pta h ...mere phone me uski ayr meri koi pic bhi nahi...jab creamtion k baad ...un log ne mujh se uska pic maanga...obituary k liye...tab meko realize hua mere paas uski koi pic hi nahi thi....woh mera pati tha....but ..." ,Shehnaaz didn't know what to say.
"Hum log ne saath me ek month bhi nhi spend kra ....mai kabhi bhi kisi k liye acchi nahi hoti?" Shehnaaz spoke looking at the ceiling.
"Bacche rishte toh dil se hote h ....saath me phere lene se hum waade karte h ...par unko poora dil karta h....aur dil ko rishte bnane me time lagta h...tih tum us rishte me buri nahi thi...sab kuch bas bhot jaldi ho gya."
Shehnaaz hadn't noticed that she had called Rita as ma.But rita ji had.She knew about Shehnaaz's mother, therefore knew that this little girl ,whose head lay in her lap, had elevated Rita's status. She felt overwhelmed with love for Shehnaaz.
"Adith nikalte hue ...groceries pick karni h ....supermarket pe rukna." ,sidharth told his driver and personal assistant and a close confidant.
Reaching back home, he looked for Shehnaaz but found her no where.
"Mom sana kidr h?"
"Apne room me gyi h...",she was going to add further; when sidharth spoke ,"kya samajhti h khud ko bola tha na isko...idr hi rehne ko....aur mom aap kyu Jane dia usko?"
"Bas ..abhi gyi h woh ...ghr pe baat karni thi usko....tu ja ...take a bath...fir mil lena us se!".
Taking a quick shower ,he grabbed two mugs of coffee and stood knocking at Shehnaaz door.
This was a new Sidharth, he was behaving different with Shehnaaz. Rita knew this.Her son looked at Shehnaaz in a strange way,akin ti something like when he looked at her.She was an experienced woman ,and could tell by the face of it that something was happening undercurrents, if this was what it looked like,her son was going in for a soul transforming phase and she was scared of it , both for Shehnaaz and Sidharth and all of them.
"Aaja andar ", Shehnaaz spoke.
"Teko bola tha na mai...udr hi rehne ka ...idr kahe ko aai tu phir?", he spoke in hindi understandable to Mumbai.
"Ghr pe baat karnj thi".,she spoke taking the coffee mug from his hand as she gestured him to the balcony.
"Abhi kaisi h?"
"Better."
"Darr gya tha mai..."
She smiled.
"Baby tu Jab khud k baare me bura boli na subah....mann kia there zabaan kaat du!" ,both of them used it ,humor as a defence .
"You know...meko maloom hai tu koi angel nahi h ....but tu acchi h....teko mere me bhi accah dikhta h...toh tu kaise buri hogi?" ,she questioned and challenged her at the same time.
She was amazed and bewildered. He was an amazing human being ,who had witnessed a dramatic scene unfold in front of his eyes,yet he had raised no questions, but only stood there in support.
She closed the space saying,"meko aap me accha dikhata h kyu ki...." she reached exactly where his heart was and panted a kiss,"kyuki aap ho acche...yaha se",pointing to his heart.
