Love For Too Many

Chapter 9

Talking about it never occurred. You had woken up early and left his room. You didn't have any where to go but you had plenty of time before breakfast. You made your way from the dungeons, up to the court yard embracing the winter winds that had picked up.

Severus was still asleep on the couch, worry had pulled him into a sleep full of nightmares. He couldn't escape the thoughts he had of you even in deep slumber.

He was on your mind too. As your footsteps crunched on the leaves scattered around the ground his reaction to your scars haunted you. And they continued haunting you for weeks.

It had been a month of the same routine. Wake up, get ready, eat, help Severus, eat, grade paper, get Wendy, eat, sleep. You barely looked him much less spoke to him. Only when he started up a conversation in front of students did you reply.

Minerva had noticed your distance from Severus especially when Wendy had been brought home. Looking for Dane and Wendy had taken longer than anyone had originally thought. Dane and Wendy had been spotted but they never left the house. Finally Dane left for food and was captured and sent to Azkaban. Wendy scared at her fathers capture cried the whole way back to your arms. She joined you in your newly formed quarters and has been recovering since. She spends the day with a new daycare provider and constant check ins from teachers until you picked her up after work for the rest of the night.

You had become very protective over her after the situation and didn't like lots of people near her. So every chance you got you were with Wendy or taking Wendy out of the castle to play in the leaves.

You didn't trust many people but you still wanted Wendy to grow up with a good life.

"Mom?" Wendy asked in her adorably sweet voice.

"Yes bug?"

"Can we play?" She pointed out the window to a giant pile of leaves.

"It's very cold out." A monotone voice said from behind you.

"Sure bug, let's put on your coat." It was Saturday and the chilly wind had greatly picked up and snow had already fallen once. But the snow had melted quickly after and any left over leaves had fallen.

With Wendy situated in her coat you headed out to the pile of leaves completely ignoring the cold man glaring at you from behind. He was always worried Wendy or you would get a cold.

Bug played happily in the leaves throwing them about and handing you piles to "keep safe." Severus had stalked off to brood somewhere else. And you were sitting happily on the ground perfectly content to watch Wendy for the rest of your existence.

He sat in one of the green armchairs you had brought to the office. Thoughts of your scarred body flashed through his head angering him. What he would do to hurt Dane was unfathomable. He wasn't sure why he felt like this and he couldn't help thinking of your shared kiss. You obviously had a bad past and Severus didn't want to screw that up, but he felt drawn to you in a way he hadn't felt in a very long time. After Lily passed he had many girlfriends one he almost married. But he always broke it off because it was ammunition for the dark lord.

Severus had pledged his loyalty to Voldemort and Dumbledore many years ago not knowing the amount of pain it would cause him and his love life. But just looking at you made him want to smile. Looking at Wendy made him feel responsible like it was his duty to make sure she was never hurt again for it would hurt her mother.

He regretted ever making her show her scars only because she wouldn't talk to him now. It pained her to think of all the trauma she had been through. Sitting with Wendy was a constant reminder of what she endured for such a tiny life. But it was worth it. Wendy is her sun and moon. Her happiness and her life. The reason she wakes up and the reason she sleeps at night. Wendy was what it took her to realize you had purpose to live outside of his walls.

You knew that now. You knew you had purpose and that it wasn't all Wendy but Wendy was what it took to wake you up. Dane left scars too deep for fixing physically and emotionally. But Wendy was the glue that held you together and the potion that constantly worked to fix those scars.

That's what Severus wanted to be. He wanted to be your glue and your life. But he was off limits to your tormented brain.