TLWM: The Hate Experience

\V/ The Old Black Heart

   Now, "Raven's ex-husband" may sound scary, and sure they had a tumultuous ending with Raven screwing him out of fatherhood and all. But Nazim Amari wasn't actually a grudgeful kind of cat.

     Nazim was what they always called a "character". Yes, he was arrogant, charming and impenetrable. But also, in a literal sense his physical qualities made it look like he was yanked out of a Hanna-Barbera cartoon and slapped onto planet Earth. It was that chiseled jawline, sharp as a butcher knife, and those gray-slate eyes, round and oversized. Even if your intention was to glance, they'd swallow you whole before you ever had the chance to look away. He wasn't hideous nor strikingly good-looking, but with his GQ sense of fashion and irresistible charisma, women fell for him easily. Raven did at the age of six, then only knowing how to describe him to her mother as "strange-beautiful".

Nazim was always in the same grade as Raven but they actually first met in a Haitian woman's home. Esther was their babysitter who sat them from elementary to middle school. Even when Raven moved out of Brooklyn for a little while, she was talking to him on the phone every night. She hated for them to be apart.

Heavily bonded, all those around them were sure they were destined for marriage, though the two friends thought otherwise. But it would be their parents who'd convince Nazim Raven was "the one" and push them down the aisle.

In the end, Raven and Nazim broke each other and both claimed some blame. But it was no argument that Raven's betrayal-meter more than doubled Nazim's. He could've hated her for the rest of his life but again, he wasn't that type of cat. Blow by blow, he never acted out of "character". As his clavicle tattoo suggested, bury it in your heart and walk on with your memories.

Now, Raven stood indecisively between the hallway and Blue Jay Meeting Room in front of her greatest fear. Once, that was facing Prince, which she always anticipated but she surely never thought she'd have to see Nazim again. Just like that, she was reminded of her old black heart.

"Try not to offend me," he said in his usual steady tone. "I'm here doing you a favor right now."

Favor or entrapment, Raven couldn't stand being on the offense again. She turned and ran off.

Making a hasty way towards the elevator, heels silenced by the fancy carpet, she noticed Nazim tailing her shadow. "I'm officially offended," he said. "Stop being a pussy and talk to me."

Raven kept jamming her finger in the elevator button as if it'd make it fly down faster. Please get me the fuck out of here.

"Raven?"

She stood with her eyes closed, as if trying to wish herself awake.

"Ravenanna..."

But this wasn't a dream and it was impossible to ignore the nostalgic nickname thrown out there. Raven opened her sights to the floor, then peeked over at his shoes. Classic Nazim. Loafers, jeans, button up and cool ass jacket.

He leaned on the wall space beside the elevator. "Would it help if I said I don't hate you completely?"

Raven was pulled into his gaze with one innocent look. Just a dip felt so cold and invasive, like he was reading her thoughts.

"Yes, I know I look good." Perhaps, he was. "You wanna get a room or you wanna talk?"

Raven snapped out of it, rolling her eyes. "Neither." The elevator arrived at her rescue right on time. The doors flew open and she had to take a step back as a couple moved out. A smile and nod and then she ran in to take their place.