PULLING TEETH {Billie Joe Armstrong)

🖤 Eight 🖤

Courtney's p.o.v

I opened my eyes and rolled onto my left side. I closed my eyes again, not wanting to wake up. But my mind registered that I was not in a familiar place, so I opened my eyes once more.

For a second, I thought I was in a hotel. But then I remembered a few details from the night before, and I realized I was at Billie's house. In his bed.

I rolled onto my back and lifted up the blanket, seeing that I wasn't completely naked, but close.

I got out of bed and went into the bathroom. I lifted the toilet lid and threw up my guts. I was so drunk the night before, and I felt so awful that morning.

I washed my hands and looked in the mirror. I looked like I'd been to hell and back.

"Oh fuck." I said, drying my hands on the hand towels, still staring at my reflection. I realized that Billie had seen my arms. He'd seen a lot of me.

I didn't want to leave the bathroom, for fear of having to talk about last night with Billie. I didn't remember much, but I did remember driving with Baz, the both of us drunk, knocking on Billie's door, and crying into his shoulder about something.

I couldn't stay in the bathroom forever, though. I opened the door ans slowly stepped out.

Billie was still asleep, so I laid down beside him, trying to be as quiet as I could. I covered myself with the blanket and just stared at Billie.

He shifted a bit, turning onto his back. He opened his green eyes and realized that I was beside him.

"Oh, hey." he said.

"What happened last night?" I asked.

"Oh," Billie said, stretching out. "Well, you said my bass was ugly.".

I smiled and made eye contact with Billie. "Sorry." I giggled. I sighed and looked up at the ceiling.

"Courtney." Billie said, his tone now serious. I turned my head to look at him.

"Yes, Billie?".

"Do you really want to kill yourself?".

I bit my lip and closed my eyes, trying to keep myself from crying. I did want to kill myself to end my misery. To not have to deal with my parents, or my heroin addiction, or all the bullies at school.

I buried my face into the pillow and burst into tears.

"It's alright, babe. Let it all out." Billie said.

I turned onto my back again and wiped my eyes.

"I just… I have… I don't wanna deal with life anymore." I said.

Billie wrapped his arm around me and stared right into my eyes. I noticed then how beautiful his green eyes were, and I was honestly a bit intimidated by them.

"Aww, babe, I understand." he replied.

"At school…" I trailed off, breaking eye contact with him.

"What happened at school?".

"Well, in the locker room, some girls… they saw the cuts on my arms. Then they told a whole bunch of people. And I was told I should kill myself and that I wouldn't be missed." I said. A tear rolled down my cheek at the memory.

Billie gently wiped away the tear with his thumb. "Aww, honey, that's awful." he said quietly, leaning in closer. I was attracted to him and I wanted him.

No, I didn't only want him. I was beginning to need him.

"And my parents… they've told me they don't love me.".

"Fuck." Billie whispered. "Oh, fuck, that's terrible.".

"I know.".

"I'm so sorry, babe.".

"No, Billie, don't be, it's not your-".

I was cut off by Billie's lips pressed against mine. I wrapped my arms around his neck and kissed him harder as he got right on top of me. His groin rubbed against mine and I could feel his erection.

I wanted more, but he stopped kissing me.

I stared into his green eyes, so many thoughts running through my head. 

"Billie…" I started. But I couldn't finish my sentence as he got up and went into the bathroom. I heard the shower turn on.

"What the fuck?" I said to myself. I stood up and grabbed my clothes off the floor. As soon as I put them on, I made my way downstairs.

As I slipped on my shoes, I wondered if I should stay or not.

But I chose to go.