nebraskan lights | skammy (finished)

03 | sam

When I got home I was met with a curious glance from my room mates, Matthew and Carter, and I smiled.

"Well?" Matt asked, "how was today lil singer?"

"Lil singer?" I questioned him with a laugh, grabbing a water bottle from the fridge and just shrugged, "met a nice boy today."

I have known Matt and Carter before I moved to LA, they were both the reason I chose to come out and give my singing career a try. Matt and Carter were easily both of my best friends, no scratch that, my only friends right now. They have lived in LA for about a year, both chasing their careers of acting and making people happy.

Knowing them for about a year, they both knew about something personal and deep about me. My sexuality that I hid and denied for so long. I was bisexual, but mostly I was attracted to males.

Matt and Carter both said they understood and I am so happy to have them both in my life and this crazy journey I'm going through right now.

"Well," Carter raised an eyebrow, setting down his phone, "any details about this oh so dreamy guy I am so in looooove!!!"

I blushed, "n-no, I-I"

"Kidding," Carter reassured me with a smile, "sorry I made you nervous."

"You're fine," my eyes connected with the floor and smiled my shy smile, dimples poking out nervously, "he said his name was Nate. Nate Maloley. He had the prettiest eyes, and his teeth were straight and stunning. He had tattoos, and oh my god, he can rap for God's sake."

I saw Matthew's jaw clench at the tatted up boy's name and he let out a small sigh, "Sam... you can't like him."

"W-What why?" I asked, feeling the panic seep through my veins, "oh my god why?! Does he have some sort of girlfriend? Oh my god, has he been to jail? Has he murdered someone!?"

I felt the panic attack coming on as I gasped wildly for breath, and Carter began to try and calm me down.

"Do you need your medicine?" he asked sternly, giving Matt a hard glare, "are you okay? Medicine? Ambulance? Anything?"

I shook my head no and calmed myself down with deep breaths and counting. I settled down eventually and glanced at Matt, "what's wrong with him?"

"Nothing is wrong with him.." Matt trailed off, "he's just a little.... reckless."

"What do you mean?" I furrowed my eyebrows, why is he acting so weird?

"Okay, Sam, he's not a good influence on you. He does drugs, drinks, has sex with anything that has a pulse, and god, you're so you. You're so cute and innocent and you do not need to be messing around with Nate Maloley."

I was shocked to say the least. But why is Matt telling me who I am or am not to "mess around with"? I just shook my head at him.

"What do you even mean, I'm so me?" I met his eyes.

"Sam, you're so pure like a white lamb. You have never touched alcohol or drugs of any kind, and you sure as hell don't curse like he does!"

"I curse," I defend myself.

"In songs. When it's needed. When they force you to."

"But I curse," I laughed at him, "why are you so opposed to me and Nate?"

"He's going to wreck you.... just please, stay away from him."

"We work in the same studio, how am I even going to accomplish that?"

Carter jumped in the conversation at this point after being silent for a long time, "he's right, Sam."

I looked at him with lifted eyebrows. He's really siding with Matt on this? How dangerous can a person be? Plus, he was really nice when I met him and didn't seem dangerous. He seemed perfectly fine, and hot. He was hot.

"Sam! Are you even listening to me?" Matt demanded, getting angry. "Stay away from him."

"Yeah, I heard you," I blushed in embarrassment and dropped my head, "do you guys know about Jack and Jack?"

Matt's eyes lit up like fireworks, "yes! Where they there today?"

"No, yesterday," I said, smiling, "they were really nice but I talked with, I think his name was Gilinsky, the most."

"Ahhh, good ole Gilinsky." Carter piped in, nodding, "nice guy."

"Yeah," I agreed, sighing with relief as I found common ground with people they seem to know and like. "Anyways, did you guys see the big Ferris Wheel downtown? Wanna go right now?"

"Yeah let's go!" Matt grabbed his phone off the charger and slid it into his pocket, making sure he had his wallet and the keys to the apartment.

"Ugh, why me??" Carter groaned, running his fingers through his hair as he slipped on some shoes.

* *

The walk downtown took ten minutes tops and our conversations filled the empty side streets as we took shortcuts to get there quicker. The warm LA air stuck to my skin and it felt nice.

While Carter and Matt did most of the talking, they never stop, I swear, I let myself think. Think about everything that was happening right now. My life, Nate, my music, all my fans, everything and anything that came to my mind. I realized that I was happy for the first time in a long time.

I saw the Ferris Wheel's flashing lights and it snapped me out of my thoughts as I reached for Matt and Carter's arms to drag them, or speed them up, to get their faster.

Then out of the corner of my eye I spotted familiar brown hair and stopped dragging the two boys and looked for a second.

He turned around and made eye contact with me.

"Hey, Sam!"

"Gilinsky!" I screamed, leaping over to him. "Where's Johnson?"

"He's on the search for a funnel cake," Jack laughed, "god, I love that kid. What are you guys doing here?"

"Sam saw the Ferris Wheel and freaked out and said we had to come," Carter laughed along with Jack.

I felt slightly embarrassed, still standing close to Matt's side, my fingers clenched around his wrist.

Johnson came back, empty-handed with a pout on his face, "they didn't even have any funnel cakes! What the fuck? What kind of fair doesn't have funnel cakes?"

Gilinsky laughed at the younger boy's antics, and slipped his fingers into the shorter boy's, and Johnson laid his head on G's shoulder.

I felt my heart burst, oh my god, what the hell, they're so cute. Gilinsky didn't tell me they were dating!

"Want to come on the Ferris Wheel with us?" Matt asked, finally putting my fingers in his so I could hold his hand.

Matt found out the first day I got here, when I panic or am nervous holding someone's hand always calms me down. It's usually him always placing my hand in his, but he knows it calms me down and is more than happy to do it. I feel really special to have Matt in my life.

Matt deserves the world, but the world doesn't deserve Matt.

As my eyes connected with the LA stars, all I was wondering about was a certain boy with tatted up skin and a smile that could align all the stars in the sky.

* *

author's note

omg hi guys!! sorry for such a delay on the update!! i went to taylor's oddrhyme show and omf zac is so nice and i have so much fun thanks to him. anyway hope u all are having the most wonderful day!

see u soon! w/all the love in the world, m xx