My heart's a hieroglyph, it talks in tongues. Ten thousand voices fill my broken lungs. But through the white waves, I still hear it call.
So, take a deep breath, let's disappear. No-one will miss us so why are we still here? And in the black hole, you will see it all.
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*Stephanie's Point Of View.*
"I heard you're going to Ireland, Dublin to be exact, well so am I! I don't know, maybe I'll see you there babe. ;P"
That was the text I received from Dylan this morning and it was now 1:30 in the afternoon, so far today it has been playing at the back of my mind constantly bugging me and reminding me of his sick and twisted way.
Right now, me and the guys of Bring Me The Horizon were currently sitting in the airport waiting to start boarding the plane which was set to land to pick us up in about 30 minutes.
"So, you excited to go to Ireland for the first time?" Jordan asks me snapping me from my thoughts.
"What? Erm... Yeah... yeah I'm kind of excited to go to Ireland." I stutter slightly which then results in Lee giving me a questioning look.
"Steph, what's up." Oli asks me throwing his arm over my shoulders.
"Huh? Oh erm, nothing... I'm erm... I guess I'm just worried about the flying considering I haven't been on a plane in years." I lie hoping he believes it- I mean they've believed a lot of my other lies so hopefully they believe this one too.
"Steph you'll be fine love." Nicholls smiles at me.
Will I? Will I actually be fine? After everything Dylan has done to me. He's messed me up both Mentally and Physically... I feel I may never be fine again.
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"What are you thinking about Steph?" Lee asks me.
Now we were on the plane heading to Ireland. I was currently sat in between Lee and Oli (my brother now having fallen asleep) and then Jordan, Vegan and Nicholls were sat a couple of rows behind us.
"Nothing." I lie leaning my head on Lee's shoulder not really thinking about it as anything, he's my best friend so it means nothing anyway.
"I know that's a lie Steph." He states wrapping his arm around my shoulders which makes me sigh. "Please, just tell me, I feel you've been keeping a lot from us."
"It's complicated, plus I can't tell you, please just drop it, Lee." I sigh before burying my face into his shoulder.
"Okay." He sighs before gently kissing the top of my head. "Did Oli tell you about the last time we were in Dublin?"
"What when Oli and Nicholls went out and ended up getting really drunk and then when they got back Oli thought it would be funny to pour freezing cold water over Nicholls?" I ask laughing slightly at my idiotic brother and our friend.
"Yeah, God, I don't know what got into him." Lee laughs along with me, to be fair it really wasn't as funny as we made it out to be but to us it just was hilarious.
"Alcohol is what got into him." I then say sarcastically making Lee laugh more while I calmed down from my laughing fit.
"We're messes, aren't we." Lee then says after having calmed down- his arm still around my shoulders as my head lays on his shoulder.
"Yeah..." I trail off. Dylan, he messed me up.
"Hey, hey, hey, whatever you're thinking about just stop it please. Look how happy you were 10 seconds ago." Lee rushes as he pulls me closer to him (as if we could get any closer, we were sitting on a bloody plane next to each other) as he wraps me into a bear hug.
Just then I hear heavy breathing coming from next to me- Oli. Although I'm used to Oli waking up like this as it's part of his sleep paralysis I still worry about my brother.
"You okay Oli?" I ask him after I know he's fully awake.
"Yeah I'm fine." he says casually shrugging as if he didn't just wake up breathing as if he'd run a marathon.
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Once the plane had landed and we had gone through boarder control before grabbing our bags we went outside to meet the tour bus we had hired out for the short tour in Ireland.
While in Ireland the band was performing tour shows in Dublin and only one show in Belfast. After the tour in the UK and Ireland is complete, we're going home for a week before setting out to the rest of Europe. Honestly, I don't know if I want to go to Europe with the band. I mean yes, I do enjoy being on tour with the guys but it's so stressful having to make sure that they don't find out about Dylan.
Anyway, right now I was sitting alone in the bunk area rereading the texts I had received from Dylan. I still don't know how he got my phone number and the fact that it's so easy for him to find me scares the shit out of me. Honestly, I wish I never went to that club on my birthday. Oli and Tom tried talking me out of it but I wouldn't listen to them and now I'm stuck like this. I should have listened to my brothers.
letting out a frustrated groan I throw my phone to the bottom of my bunk before I place my head in my hands breathing out a sigh. Lifting my head out of my hands I then roll my sleeve revealing my scar covered arm as well as the cuts I had made 5 days ago which were still healing.
As I trace the lines and marks that lie scattered on my arm I feel my bed dip from next to me as an arm instantly wraps itself around my shoulders. I don't even need to look to see who it is.
Lee.
"Why do you do it Steph?" He asks me as he takes hold of my hand in his slightly larger one before gently rolling down my sleeve to cover my ruined arm.
"The pain is relaxing. It's almost as if the physical pain takes away the mental pain. Plus, it's something that I can control, I feel like I don't have control over other things." I explain still not looking up at Lee.
"Steph, you may think it gets rid of the pain, but it doesn't. It gives the pain to someone else. After finding out, it hurt all of us. Tom, Oli, the other guys of the band. When I found out and when I had to help you clean the cuts it killed me, Stephanie. Having to listen to you hissing in pain from me cleaning the cuts made my heart break. You're my best friend and to know that I was causing you pain by cleaning the cuts made me feel terrible." Lee explains as his voice crack indicating that he had started crying.
"Lee. I'm so sorry. I didn't, I didn't realise you felt that way towards it." I whisper finally looking up to see his red puffy eyes and tear-stained cheeks.
Going to say something, Lee stops himself and instead pulls me into a tight hug to which I instantly hug him back.
" I love you Stephanie, so much, please don't forget that." Lee mumbles as his grip on me tightens almost as if he was scared he was going to lose me.
'I love you.' Hearing Lee say that made butterflies erupt in my stomach.
Do I like Lee?
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Scared To Get Close (Lee Malia/ BMTH)
FanfictionMeet Stephanie Sykes, little sister of Tom Sykes and their famous brother Oliver Sykes from Bring Me the Horizon. Stephanie was always close to her two brothers, that is until something happened at a club on Stephanie's 18th birthday. After that s...
