LET ME LOVE YOU

Chapter 37 - Euphoria

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Hafeez

Bliss.

That's the only word that comes close to describing my mood and life in general.

I've been alive for 30 years yet I didn't know that this type of feeling existed, because I never got the opportunity to actually experience it.

If someone told me a while back that I, AbudulHafeez Talba, would be this whipped and smitten over a girl in such a short amount of time, I would laugh and suggest that the person gets himself admitted to a psychiatric facility because I would just assume that some of or all the nots in their head were loose. But somehow, as unbelievable as it sounds, it was actually happening.

Aya.

My Aya.

That dangerous girl, That bewitching beauty has captured me like a prisoner, and even if I were given the key and a free road to escape from that jail, I would gladly decline.

Only once in your life, I truly believe, you find someone who can completely turn your world around, and I'm 100% sure that I've found that person In Aya. Just hearing her name makes my lungs inflate with a crazy rush of euphoria, and seeing her face makes me finally understand what it actually means and feels like to be happy.

I can tell her things that I've never shared with another soul and she will absorb everything I say and will actually want to hear more. I can share hopes for the future, dreams that might never come true, goals that were never achieved and the many disappointments life has thrown at me. When something wonderful happens, I can't wait to tell her about it, because I know she will share in my excitement. She won't ever be embarrassed to cry with me when I'm hurting or laugh with me when I make a fool of myself, which I do quite a lot. There is never any pressure or bad vibes when she's around, only a quiet calmness. With her, I can actually be myself and not worry about what she will think of me because she has accepted and appreciated me for who I am, and she tries her best, her absolutely best to avoid hurting my feelings.

Memories of my childhood suddenly came back so clearly and vividly, it felt just like being my 10 years old seeks again. Colours seem brighter and more brilliant, Laughter became a part of my daily life where it used to be  infrequent or at some point, didn't even exist at all. A phone call or two with her during the day helps to get me through a long day's work and that heart wrenching moment when a heavy deal refuses to go as planned. there's literally not even a need for continuous conversations because I'm more than content with just having her nearby. Things that never interested me before, like watching all those sappy romantic movies and learning about the endless shades of the color red, suddenly became fascinating because I know they are important to her. I think of her on every occasion and in everything I do, and the Simplest things like a bright blue sky, gentle wind or even a storm cloud on the horizon brings her to my mind.

Last night, when she gave me herself, it drifted me to a whole new world. While I was looking into her eyes, I suddenly started to realize things about myself that were unspoken for years, like fragments of my inner life that I deeply repressed. It's hard to distinguish if those things were buried inside me because dealing with them was such a dirty work, or if I decided that leaving them unnamed meant that it was not possible to define them precisely enough so that they would keep their true meaning, but it's not my fault, because, all this life that I've known so far was just a dream about living. And for the first time, The only thing that has kept me in touch with reality is her.